Social services

[Holliejj81213]

I've been in care since around the age of 10 I've been with my partner just over 2years I got caught pregnant last year I was in a children's home at that time and my partner was living with his mum I was 16 when I found out I was pregnant but I'm very mature for my age and I've always wanted a family of my own it wasn't planned but I'm glad it happened my partner got offered a flat a few months after I got pregnant so he did it out it's looked lovely, my son was allocated a social worker before he was even born and a month before I was due to give birth to my son my social worker told me I had to move to Sheffield and live in a mother and baby foster placement I was devastated but I knew I had to do it I have birth to beautiful healthy baby boy on 8/12/13:) when he was around/over 2weeks old I went to Rotherham with him to see my family on 3 occasions and the foster career would usually drop/pick us up it had been arranged that from my birthday 23/12/13 I could go and stay with my family and my son until Boxing Day but on that day the unimaginable happened to me my beautiful little boy was taken from me and put into a separate foster placement my whole world has been destroyed. I have never neglected, abused or harmed my son and I have never let him be subject to any sort of harm the social services excuse to the court was that they felt he was at risk of harm in the future and the judge sided with them, I now live with my partner in his flat we see our son 3 times a week and we are hoping and praying we get him back I know we're only young but we are good parents and love our child unconditionally- If anyone could give us some advice we would be more than grateful

I am sorry I don't have any direct advice about your situation as i havnt experienced or work in that field.

Keep seeing your son.
Keep jumping through the hoops.
Show you are stable and settled.

Did they say you needed to address any issues? Have you done this?

Do they have issues with your DP? I ask as they moved you away from him and which I thought would have been a source of support.

Someone who knows more about SS and may have experience may come along soon.

Totally agree with the above comments, continue the contact you have and make sure you turn up on time every time.

I know it must be awful for you but when you are with your son you will be being assessed by whoever is supervising every second, make sure you give no cause for concern. This means no nipping out for a fag during contact, and spending every second of it with your son.

Are there issues with your family, as you were in care for so long, they will have to have shown the Court why they thought your son was at risk from harm - whatever the reasons you need to deal with them. Many 16 year olds have babies and do not have them removed into care. If you had stayed in the unit would you have been allowed to keep him with you and is it because you pushed to leave there? You may have to make choices between your family/partner and your son, only you can do that and decide which is most important to you. I have residence of my 4 grandchildren because at the time it mattered their mother could not prioritise them above her man and her drug addiction. She bitterly regrets this 5 years on, now that she can look back and see clearly.

I know that at the moment SS budgets are tight and they do not have enough foster carers to go around so for them to have taken this action they must genuinely believe that your son is at risk. It may be time to start being honest with yourself! Don't give up on getting him back if you can jump through their hoops!

I do all I can to prove I'm a good mum and I don't have much contact with my family I made a mistake by leaving the placement I wish I didn't I don't believe I am going to get him back and I just don't know what to do anymore

Have you asked them what you need to do to be able to get him back?

If you were in care because you were at risk in anywy from your family and you have returned then they will apply the same protection to your son.

Ask if you can return to your placement?

Is your partner abusive in anyway? drink, drugs, violent,?

As a mum of two who came close to a similr situation you are in when I was 19 I can tell you the friends you have today and partner are not likely to be the ones you will opt to stay with and have around - people move much more these days for work, housing etc.

`Please take stock of your situation. If there is something you want to share please do and hopefully we can help you.

Are you in contact with any other support organisation for young mums? I hope you dont think Ive been pushy but you can be the best the mum in the world care/interaction/concerned etc but if there are people around you who SS dont believer you can protect your child from then it makes things difficult. So it may not be you but where/who your are with.