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Advice on response to statement for residence

31 replies

gracehedley · 12/05/2014 12:54

My ex h has started court application to get a residence order for our son - he wants sole residence. He has a solicitor and I am representing myself. I have received his statement which is long and detailed (18 pages) and am thinking about putting together my response - is there a preferred way of doing this - ought I to address every point he has raised, or be more brief in my objections? Should I only respond to the points he has made, or can I bring in other relevant factors? Thanks for any advice.

OP posts:
gracehedley · 15/05/2014 14:54

My ex h in his statement has said that I spend too much time on Mumsnet which has led to me not providing an adequate level of care for our son Shock

OP posts:
absoluteidiot · 15/05/2014 14:56

I've been through this particular mill - and the kids' dad was a vexatious litigator who has had maybe 20 court cases in his time, although courts never seem to notice this, so take the dick seriously.

He was harassing me and the coppers advised me to take it to the Family Courts and establish residency, decide about contact etc, before he tried to abduct the kids. Sure enough, he put in a counterclaim (whatever it's called) trying to get residency himself, suddenly wanting to take my kids to live 200 miles away from everything they'd ever known, in his infested one bed flat.

I hated the way he was so obviously litigious (you think 18 pages is bad - this idiot could knock out 100 pages, no trouble), and yet the system took him as seriously as if he'd been sane.

One thing they did at an initial hearing, on clocking how nuts he was, was to appoint a psychiatrist who had to evaluate him (and us, as well). erdict was that he was mentally ill and I wasn't. This was the biggest factor leading up to him (after 18 months) being denied residency and, on top of that, not even allowed direct contact.

One of the earliest warning flags at a very early on hearing (and there were countless hearings before the big day) was the fact he wrote these lengthy rambles.

Use it to suggest he needs a psychiatric evaluation. And hope the doctor sees it your way.

absoluteidiot · 15/05/2014 15:02

My ex had taken our first son to a playgroup once a week, 'to give me a rest' when I was pregnant with No 2. I had a feeling at the time I was being set up as he never did a thing for me, and never had the kids on his own, or spent a penny on them. But I was so desperate for an hour or two off a week, I let him.

Was not surprised when it came to court and the prat had actually got some of the yummy mummies at the playgroup to say I was a shit mother because they never saw me once - and he had done all these groovy activities.

Luckily the judge saw right through it.

He also did something my lawyer called "ambient noise". Turned up to court with a 'gift' for the boys (this man has yet to pay a single penny in maintenance for these kids, 13 years on). Made a big queeny fuss about me giving them it. Lawyer told me after they see it all the time and judges see right through that, too. I took it, but artfully placed it in one of the court bins - right at the top so he'd see it if he walked past.

So much for the ambient music. He's Fathers 4 Justice's biggest fanboy. They give them little scripts to submit and again, my solicitor clocked one of these and told me they also see that all the time and judges don't look kindly on it.

3xcookedchips · 15/05/2014 18:17

I've seen a PowerPoint presentation in landscape with bar charts and quotes from the United Nations, with headings such as Executive Summary...

Spero · 15/05/2014 21:45

Ok chips you win. I can't top that.

And let's hope I never do....

dirtybanana · 16/05/2014 05:18

He must be spending his time on "arsenet" if there is such a thing!

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