Husband has Dispensed with his Solicitor's Services....

[MrsC1969HJ]

I received an e-mail from my STBXH this morning which he had sent to his solicitor and copied me in stating that he was dispensing with their services as he no longer has the funds to pay them. We are in the middle of a very messy and nasty divorce, he had an affair, it's a long story but he has totally screwed me financially, left me on income support and mortgage interest relief. We have one DS, aged 3, and my daughter, his step-child of 14 years.

We are due to start mediation (again) in a couple of weeks time, he is doing all sorts to avoid financial disclosure as is his mistress who he now lives with, a woman who was recently widowed after her public servant husband was killed in an RTA. How will this lack of legal rep impact on me and has he actually made a rod for his own back by doing this? He has been through 5 solicitors thus far.

I initiated the divorce on the grounds of his adultery and have my decree nisi. I will not be applying for the absolute as I am not ready to do so psychologically although I could apply for it this coming Tuesday if I choose to. In his email to his solicitor, my H has stated that he will pay a fee of £100 for the "completion of the divorce". I have no idea what this means, why would his solicitor be dealing with "the completion of the divorce". Obviously, I will give this information to my own solicitor next week but it's bugging me...so any advice would be gratefully received! Thank you in advance :-)

I'd get my solicitor to go for a decree absolute next week and screw his for all his money asnd half of hers. If he refuses to use a solicitor you might win.

Do NOT go for decree absolute until you have finances sorted as you are effectively stopping yourself getting any part of his future earnings/capital. I say this as a family solicitor.

Sorry pauline but that is not good advice.

Do you have your own solicitor?

Pauline6703...I wish it were that simple! Thank you for your post. He is hiding money I think, creating new companies, I have picked up quite a trail. Disclosure will be interesting! She has got him completely dependant on her. It's a right mess. I am not sure quite how he's helped himself but dispensing with legal rep at this stage...very odd!!! :-/

Is she a party to the case? If so did she respond to the original petition. If not I don't think you can force her to make a financial disclosure but I believe you can get your STBex to disclose what he knows of her position.

Not certain of that though. zumby will know better.

It's standard for people to hide money - I don't think I have ever dealt with a case where people don't!

Full disclosure is important otherwise how can the court make a fair and equitable decision? Your solicitor should (and I have to say...it doesn't always happen because while Family Law Solicitors know all about Family Law they often know little about Property or Contract Law which overlaps into finance matters) go through all the information, do a little detective work and be able to find the `holes' in any statement - i.e. if he's been withdrawing £1,000 a month and there is no explanation where it has gone...why?

Finance is not like Child Matters. It's not about wishes and feelings - it's about cold, hard cash. In a lot of ways it's far simpler and more cut and dried.

As for your ex not having a solicitor - it's usually better to have one (or a McKenzie Friend - what I do) - because they tend to help haggle a solution meaning you don't go to trial. That's a full day's hearing with cross examination by barristers and the like and believe me, that isn't nice.

Thanks so much for responses Zumby lostdad and listsandbudgets. The situation is it is an adultery divorce, I didn't name her but have a written admission from her that she started an affair with my husband, he agreed to the adultery. They live together. He registered his business at her business address a few days after leaving. He cut off all finances save maintenance for son, cut off EVERYTHING leaving me to claim income support and tax credits and latterly mortgage interest relief. I have been a SAHM (essentially) for 5 years but also worked for his company and received a monthly salary (admin etc). He sacked me without notice and I received my P45 within a week of him leaving. He has started a new company that he doesn't know I know about. He sold his van to drive her dead husband's car. He is listed as a tenant at the property rather than a co-occupier. She has 3 businesses and would also have received a large sum as her husband was killed last year, he was a public servant. Have checked all this out. I have discovered two additional bank accounts that my husband has that he didn't have when he left and he claims to be "thousands in debt". Wasn't when he left here 6 months ago. He is now claiming he has no work save for an annual maintenance contract worth around £23K and has stopped his regular additional work. He tied himself in knots at the first mediation saying that he took X amount from the business which he gave to me and his "partner" gave him money to live on. Mediator said "you don't make any contribution to the household you live in now" and he said "yes, part of the mortgage and the utilities" and she said "what out of the money your partner gives you"...to which he started stuttering. I don't believe he will tell the truth on Form E. He has said the OW "won't" disclose and said he was moving out as it was temporary accommodation. He is still there. He emailed his legal team on Easter Sunday and told them he could no longer afford to retain them. Oh and he also sent an email to his solicitor a few weeks ago, copying me in, stating "can I default on the mortgage and cancel the direct debit, I don't think its' fair I am paying the mortgage for these people"...these people being me, his wife of 14 years, his 15 year old stepD and our son, aged 3 (currently undergoing assessment for ASD). What a charmer he is! Aside from the emotional hell of this situation, I can't believe he's trying to screw me financially aswell. He is happy for us to lose the family home believing that he will then get custody of son. He is totally deluded. From being a kind, generous man, he has turned into a monster. I know this is not about emotion, but it does count for me. Oh and he has also cancelled the car insurance, minutes before I had to take kids to school, so I couldn't use the car. So if any of you legal bods can advise, I would be grateful!!! I have a solicitor but my brother paying my bills and I try to use her as little as possible, hence mediation.

What difference does it make what his new woman has or earns?

newbieman1978 Disclosure of a partner's finances is now a legal requirement. In my case, my husband has moved into a large house with the OW, has no mortgage or rent, drives a car provided by her and has disposed of assets yet is telling me he has no money and has left us, his family, on state benefits, even stopping paying his own mortgage. Therefore, I imagine the court would consider that his financial situation is actually greatly improved by his current circumstances as he now has a joint income with hugely reduced outgoings and a much improved personal income. Hence disclosure and hopefully the possibility of a fair settlement for my children and I who have been left in dire financial circumstances by these two selfish individuals!