Care of children if the worst happens

[NiceCupOfTeaAndASitDown]

I'm just wondering and can't find anywhere online..if it's possible for parents to appoint people to take a guardianship role in their children's lives if they should die or be unable to look after them -without it being these people who actually take on the responsibility of bringing them up? I mean is it possible to have in your will that you wish your children to be adopted into a loving family if you were to die...but to have the guidance of trusted friends for example who would know the child's best interests in the way of grandparents input etc.

I'm not sure if I'm making much sense, basically I'd like to take a legal step to protect my children if DH or I were to die or become so disabled we couldn't care for them...but we wouldn't want them to go to family and feel it's too big an ask of our friends..especially as we're possibly having more!

nobody I speak to in RL seems to have done anything about a will or has a trusted person in mind...can it be in a will that children should be adopted if the worst should happen? if so would these wishes be followed and how much say would parents have (if any) in the type of family they went to?

obviously I'm hoping the situation should never arise but I want to be prepared so I can trust my children would be safe (family ishoos) and happy just in case...and I'd really like to speak to friends and get something legal drawn up if this is a possibility.

many thanks if you can understand my post and have advice

we have a will that names all relevant family members (siblings of me & dh) as guardians with stipulation that they should sort out a sensible arrangement. we trust them to do that, and can't specify the right arrangement in advance (some siblings abroad / moving etc). There are also named financial guardians, so the children could end up living with person A but with finances overseen by person B.

A lawyer should be able to help you draw up sensible wording, but I think it important not to tie the hands of the people dealing with the situation because you want this document to last at least 5 if not 10 years, and people's lives / needs / abilities to help all change.

We have my best friend named as guardian in our will. Not expecting her to necessarily take in our two but to decide best place for them. Would be very different if now when they are 3and 5 than it would in ten years time etc. Our parents are too old to care for them and our siblings are childless by choice or have 3 (and live hundreds of miles away and don't have much in common with us)

strange you don't know anyone who has this sorted because it is essential to make arrangements. Hopefully it won't happen (obviously you'll die but all being well it will be long after your children are independent) but you must make provision in case it does.

it is indeed possible to set up legally and should be done. As noted, the 'guardian' does not need to be the person who takes them in, but does need lots of help and guidance from you.

not having a will at all is even more irresponsible, because death is a 100% certainty.

thanks all, so it seems like legal guardians are the way to go. I just know that in the event of there being no will that family/grandparents may be considered and that would be a complete no-no for us due to their age and other things. can't believe we haven't got this sorted yet but there always seems to be something else to do/pay for. like pp have said it's best to get sorted even though we all hope it won't be needed. Will have to look into how to write a will now and get some legal stuff sorted, I've no idea what I'm doing thank you all for your replies