Not complying with Judge's directions after hearing..

[mumtobealloveragain]

It's a long story so I'll try and keep it short as have posted here before about this..

Jointly owned property with ex. He moved out when we separated knowing I couldn't afford the mortgage. I asked him to agree to sell but he refused. He refused to buy me out or agree to rent it out. I paid and lived there for as long as I could and eventually moved out and rented somewhere much cheaper. It was empty for around 18mths. I tried to resolve it, my solicitor sent 6 letters all ignored, invited him to mediation, he declined etc. my hands were tied and mortgage arrears mounted. He basically ditched all responsibility for it.

I applied to Court for an order of sale. He immediately moved into the property. We have 50:50 shared residency of our two small children. He could rent elsewhere for the same money and has only lived there 2 months. There's some equity which means we'd both get around 10-15k each so he'd have plenty to sort out a new home.

Initial order of sale hearing was last month. He didn't turn up. Judge heard my details in brief. My main argument is his irresponsibility and lack of long term ability to pay the mortgage & his refusal to communicate for so long. Basically he's a financial liability to me and is using the property to financially control me. He knows I can't get a mortgage with my new (not so new) partner whilst tied to this one and he knows I could do with the money the sale would release. Me also knows it's causing me stress and worry that he will screw up payments and walk away from it again.

Anyway. The Judge order we both file statements and evidence for/against sale. I provided mine to the Court and a copy to him (sent special delivery signed for). The date for him to file his statement and evidence was two weeks ago I've had nothing and the court say they haven't either.

What does this mean? Will it go in my favour that he didn't comply? The next hearing isn't for another 6 weeks can he come along and plead his case without having submitted his statement and evidence first as directed?

His argument is that it is the children's home. It is but one of two home and they've only stayed there a few weeks so far. Would be submit this argument via statement or a Court application of some kind I do with the children's Act to stop the sale? I'm all confused.

Thanks for any advice!

Apologies for awful typos / damn iPhone!

With that little equity & it forming a base for the children I can't see a judge directing for it to be sold. Can he afford to take over the mortgage as that seems the most sensible thing to rule.

Thanks for your reply. No he can't afford to buy me out and doesn't have anyone willing to help him do so. He's doing it to control me as he knows me and my new partner can't get a new mortgage whilst he holds me to this one.

There's no reason he has to live there the mortgage repayments are about the same and monthly rental costs in nearby areas. I'm hoping his claim that it's their home so can't be sold holds little weight due to the fact he moved in there through choice knowing I had applied to Court for an order of sale and they've only stayed there a few weeks in total too. Hardly their habitual home.

Sorry, I think you are going to be disappointed. Could he get the mortgage in his name if he had all the equity? As far as the courts are concerned you are both housed therefore why change the staus quo?

Unless he is not paying the mortgage now?

He is paying the mortgage now unfortunately.

I see what you're saying but my opinion (which so hope the Judge sees as a valid one) is why should I be held on a mortgage and not have access to my 10-15k (which is a massive amount of money for us) why should I not be able to move on and buy a property with my new partner etc just cause he has decided to move in there. He could move out and rent elsewhere and we could both have a tidy sum if money and move on and be financially independent.

OP you have a valid point to make. The judge has a discretion, and the fact that he's not complying with the court directions can be evidence that he's being awkward over everything. It depends how he comes across in a final hearing. Here steno guarantees, but it's definitely worth a shot,

But surely Collaborate that situation applies an awful lot the other way around & the mainly male NRPs have to wait to get their names off the mortgage until the children are older. Yes, it's worth a shot BUT it is providing a stable roof over their childrens heads.

Thanks all. I can't afford legal representation so doing it all myself.

I'm hoping the Judge will order in my favour (obviously). It's not any hassle or stress for him to find elsewhere to live, the children have only "lived" there for a few weeks and have 2 homes 50:50 residency. It's not their main home or settled/habitual home. It means no further financial tie with this irresponsible and financially controlling man. It means I can access the money that I really could do with to pay off debts and means I am free to get another mortgage in a couple of years so we don't have to pay stupidly high rental prices. I'm hoping the Judge will see that this far outweighs the inconvenience of him having to move and the children moving to live somewhere else whilst with him.

Can anyone advise me how his argument works? I understand it's the Children's Act that protects the children's home from being sold. Can he just turn up at Court on the day and mention this or does he need to have submitted his statement in advance? I have no idea why he hasn't ( it's 2 weeks late now) and I've called the Court and they haven't had it either. Surely if he just mentions it on the day it's a bit unfair. He's had my statement over a month and had chance to prepare a response (although who knows if he will) and counter arguments to my main points, I won't be able to do that without his statement in advance.

What if he doesn't turn up to the second hearing either..can the judge just grant me the order of sale on the day if he hasn't turned up to either of the 2 hearings or responded with a statement in line with the Judge's directions.

If he doesn't turn up the judge usually orderes in your favour because of that. However they may postpone the hearing for another date to see if he will turn up

Thanks checkedPJ's. It's so frustrating he gets so many chances. He was asked to acknowledge receipt of the original Court hearing paperwork and he didn't, he didn't turn up to the first hearing and the Judge didn't seem impressed , he hasn't submitted a statement as per the Judges directions from that hearing. Now it's possible he can just not turn up to the next hearing and get it rearranged so he gets another chance. It's crap :(

I can't see that CheckedPJ's given that there are children involved & very little equity, maybe different if the equity was sufficient to finance two homes but as things stand both op & ex are housed & have sufficient space for the children.

I was just saying in Usual court cases. I've only been to court regarding my LO and when LO's dad doesn't comply/turn up it was then ruled in my favour due to those factors.

However I can't see the fact he ignored letters, refused mediation, let arrears mount, refused sale and responsibility going against you. However if it's the same judge the fact that he hasn't shown up or complied with that order and you have may make him side with you. If you can both rent somewhere I'd hope he'd either free you from the property or order for it to be sold

Good luck OP

RedHelen yes we are "housed" in the sense that me and my new partner pay private rent for a house for us and our children. We'd be much better off financially if we could buy somewhere once I'm back to work next year. 10k from the sale would pay our rent for a whole year we'd use it to pay off debts and be in a much better financial position. EXP would get 10-15k too so that's easily enough for him to move and rent (and pay moving costs and deposit) or for him to move and buy somewhere and he'd have a deposit for a new place (except he doesn't earn enough to get a mortgage on his own).

He can't afford the mortgage alone. He told me this himself and told the mortgage provider. He asked me to extend the mortgage to make it more affordable for him but I told him no. His sister is helping him pay it at the moment but if they fall out or she can't pay he can't afford it now his wages have dropped. He also can't afford to pay to keep the standard of the property up I'm thinking repairs etc. He won't pay for repairs anyway and he is not paying the "ground rent" each month which is compulsory and which covers communal area repairs like the shared gardens etc. Last month he only paid 2/3 of the mortgage and it went a few hundred into arrears and he had to make it up this month by paying extra. I think he only paid off the underpayment after receiving my statement for Court which pointed out he'd only been there a month and had already failed to meet the mortgage repayment.

I do see your point, don't mean to argue with you I'm just so stressed and worried about it all. He knows it. This is him all over, he's doing it to get to me in the only way he has left. Arse.

mumtobe Have you got it in writing saying he's already behind in his payments etc? If so this should go in your favour a lot.

I personally can't see a judge tying you into him financially unnecessarily when he's already proving that he can't afford this property as it is

I totally see where you are coming from & can understand your frustration BUT I think if I were you I would plan on going forward without that equity as it will soon get swallowed up. Judge orders it is sold, ex drags his heels then what? If you are in a better position financially to get a mortgage then it may be ruled that he gets to keep all the equity in any case. Out of interest how much more is the mortgage costing than the private rental of a similar sized homes because mortgages are usually cheaper.

Hi. CheckedPJ's it's not in arrears now. It was the first month then he paid extra last month. Who knows about this months payment though not due til the end of the month so hopefully he'll not pay it and it will go in my favour.

The jointly owned property is in an expensive village. We (my current partner and I) have 6 children between us mine his and ours so need a larger house. We can't afford to live in the village as rents are huge so live just outside. However my ex could easily rent a small flat in or near the village (equivalent size of the jointly owned property) for around the same as the monthly mortgage amounts. Interest rates are set to rise anyway so the mortgage repayments are very likely to go up in the next year or so and then I think he will walk away from the property and it might get repossessed if I can't sell it quick enough :(

The only reason I would be better placed to get another mortgage once the property is sold is because my partner works full time and I will be working part time. Ex has reduced his hours at work. We both have the children 50:50 so it's not like he is main carer for them or anything.

But if it's 50/50 hr needs a decent sized property rather than a small flat i would imagine? the courts priority will be your children.

The jointly owned property is a small flat but plenty big enough for just him and our 2 young children 50% of the time. He can rent a similar property for a similar price.

Oh and thanks everyone I really appreciate you taking the time to post. It's the waiting that's so hard! Next hearing isn't until mid January! :(

You'll have to update us on what's happened. Remember there is more than one way to skin a cat & you may well get the mortgage & the house you want despite your ex's attitude.

Thanks Redhelen. I will definitely come back and let you know. I'm hopeful but know my chance is a slim one. I just hope the Judge looks at all the history and realises making me stay financially tied to such a financial fuck up is not in the children's best interests. Not granting me the order of sale may mean the children don't have to get used to a new place with him now, but it may mean their long term home ( mine ) is put at risk in the future when he screws me over financially again or walks off and ditches the property again and it gets repossessed and I have to declare bankruptcy ( we were hours away from that point just a couple of months ago and it was destroying me). Thanks again.