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contact issues

5 replies

exhusb123 · 23/10/2013 18:36

evening all,
this is my first post, so forgive the lack of acronyms.
Can anyone tell me if i'm being unreasonable here.
I split with my wife about 2 years ago and since that time she has moved house twice, each time i have moved to be closer to my children and each time she has moved further away from my new location. between 70 and 150 miles. each time she insists that i pick the children up and drop them off to her door having me drive in excess of 600 miles each weekend (alternate). i have pushed for medication which she has refused on multiple occasions. Each move she has not told me until after the decision has been made, including not involving me in selecting schools. I have asked for a reasonable 50/50 split on travel which she refuses simply saying if i do not pick them up then i don't see them, essentially dangling the childrens assess like a carrot, at least 5 times. She has withheld christmas last year (it was my turn to have the children and she simply denied me). This is causing some issues in my new marriage as each contact weekend there is a further bombshell dropped, sending kids with no clothes, adequate footwear and similar. I have a near as possible a ful wardrode here for them both as she will not send them in any other clothes other than what they are wearing when they arrive. I pay full maintenance every month without fail.
Any pointers here, am i being unreasonable?
many thanks

OP posts:
happydaze77 · 23/10/2013 20:33

Hi exhusb123. I don't think you're being unreasonably at all. Unfortunately I don't have any useful advice though, sorry. You may find some good advice if you repost your question in some of the following categories though Divorce/separation, Lone parents, Parenting.
(This post will have bumped you're thread to the top of AIBU too Smile
Good luck.

Lonecatwithkitten · 23/10/2013 20:46

I agree I think AIBU is not the best place for this. I would suggest contacting HQ and getting them to move it to lone parents, divorce or relationships.

exhusb123 · 23/10/2013 20:55

thanks, will get it moved.

OP posts:
JulieMumsnet · 24/10/2013 12:32

Afternoon.

Just a quick post to let you know that we're moving this into Legal.

MNHQ.

lostdad · 24/10/2013 13:31

No, you're not. Your situation is very common too.

You're asking a lot of questions though - PM me if you want help.

Would strongly advise you contact Families Need Fathers - they have a great forum with solicitors, CAFCASS officers and people in the same situation posting on it, a helpline, meetings around the country, etc.

I've been through similar problems and came out the other side.

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