Where can I get free family law legal help from?

[ladyMaryQuiteContrary]

I earn too much for legal aid yet have holes in my socks. It's not a full case, I just need someone to go through the facts and tell me if I'm on the right lines.

Thank you

I'm afraid you aren't likely to get any free advice other than a free half hour before you hire someone. Of course, you could just not hire them once you have the first half hour, but you'd both have to talk awfully quickly!

We'll all try to help on here. What are the main issues and questions?

I'm trapped in a maintenance issue and have a hearing on the 31st. twathead ds's father has employed a solicitor and they have made a stupid offer to settle to avoid court. They have attached a list of his expenses which are beyond bonkers; including charity donations, haircuts, almost 1K on clothes and gifts for his siblings and are using this to justify why ds should get practically nothing. I won't mention that they have also made it a condition that there is contact (which I believe is a separate issue entirely). I've used the .gov child maintenance assessment and have worked out that he should be paying 3 times more then they have offered but this is without taking into account ds's disabilities and school fees. There is no mention to the very large arrears that he owes us either.

I could do with knowing where I can find out what the allowable expenses are so that I am fully armed for the court.

Thank you

There is no list of "allowable expenses" and it comes down to what the judge considers to be "reasonable" expenses on both sides. Reasonableness is a very broad issue unfortunately and very subjective too. You might do well to gather together evidence to show that this declared expenses are excessive. Is there a reason why child maintenance is being dealt with through the court and not the CSA?

He's put everything down bar his postage stamps, so charity donations etc . He isn't in the UK so the CSA won't help and I've tried to sort this out without needing a court but he just ignores me. The only reason I managed to get his ridiculous offer was because of the court hearing.

Thank you.

Were you married to the ex or just living together?

Hi Xenia.

We lived together and he scarpered for an ex girlfriend. Contact between him and ds has been practically non existent for years since he left the uk but he always paid until last year when he became verbally abusive to ds. Ds said that he didn't want to see him until he apologised and I supported him. His father blamed me for this and is using the maintenance as a way to try to control me. He's always been like this.

Is it acceptable to go through the case law to back up what I consider to be unreasonable expenses or will I look like a twat?

I asked because had you been married and had a divorce consent order the court order may have dealt with school fees. Mine says (as I earned more than him) I pay school and university fees for all 5 children no matter with whom they live.

I don't know about reasonable expenses etc as my ex is not obliged to pay anything and I paid him.

I would imagine it will help to have written evidence of what he has been paying available to the court and as much information as you know about his finances.

On divorce they look at normal expenses eg someone at our income level might normally spend £20k a year on holidays, £50k on school fees, have £200 hair cuts, £600 suits. If in our case (he) and in most cases (she) has got used to that they are allowed to maintain that standard after divorce. If there was never much money then the normal expenses might well be the cost of bingo on a Friday night not the 6 nights a year at the opera or whatever. Paul McCartney's wife was assessed as needing £600,000 a year to keep up her normal expenses including cost of full time nanny. However your question is nothing to do with divorce so child support might be different.

I don't know a lot, he hasn't spoken to me for a couple of years as he thinks I'm at fault here so I'm trying to remember things he's said and look at the information I have. His solicitor has sent me details of one account (I've asked for the other two) and a list of his 'expenses'. I don't think some of the items are essential expenses, he'd even written his dw's clothes on there and his solicitor ignored them so he has included everything. There are others that she hasn't ignored which I think is incorrect (I really don't think charity donations are an expense!).

My costs have been forced to drop (although they are far higher now because of the school fees). His maintenance used to pay for ds to see a physio once a week and for his travel to school as he has to be escorted (it didn't cover these but contributed IYSWIM). I pay school fees because ds has SN (not bad enough for a statement but not in his best interests to attend a large school). It's not a lifestyle choice, it's the best place where he can get his needs met. He also requires specific clothing and shoes, computer, adapted equipment etc but I just don't have the money for all of these. His father doesn't earn loads, it's not pittance though. I've asked for an increase on several occasions as his income is higher then when the CSA did their assessment before he left the UK, but he's always ignored this. I asked him again last year before he stopped paying and he said no as they had just remortgaged. Turns out they had just bought another house (this is on his expenses form, he tried to claim both of the mortgages were an expense despite renting one out!) I can see myself asking the court to stick something on the deeds of one of these. Ds intends on going to Uni and he'll need to do a course afterwards for the bar.

I am legally trained but I have zero court experience and I'm trying to make sure that ds gets a fair and reasonable amount.

Thank you