Brief history- I separated in August 2011, stbxh had children intially 2 nights in the week and alt. weekends. Within 6 months this had gradually reduced to alt. weekends only.
He has now applied for a contact order stating I stopped the weekend contact. This is not entirely true, as I stopped overnight weekend contact because the children were ringing me in tears saying they didn't want to stay and "didn't feel safe there".
In August 2012 (through solicitors) I temporarily ceased overnight contact with the aim of establishing good daytime contact and building up to overnight again. I offered him alt weekends Sat & Sun 9am - 7pm. He declined the contact, saying he wanted them overnight, and said he would resolve this through mediation as it was costing too much in solicitors fees.
I went to the first mediation session, (October 2012), he was subsequently invited to go and didn't reply.
In December I received court papers. His application states he attended mediation (not true) and that I 'stopped weekend contact' and he wants to reinstate it.
My question is where it says do you oppose the application I don't know whether to tick yes or no? Essentially I do want to him to have them overnight again (always did), so technically I don't oppose the applicaiton. However I want it to be phased in gradually, and monitored to see how it's going. I've never denied contact, I'd love the children to have a good relationship with their father. But to hear them saying they're scared and want to come home, it's hard to know what to do. I've always encouraged them to go even when they didn't want to. He has a temper and is very loud and can be intimidating.
I should add that the children are 14, 8 and 6. 14 year old says she doesn't want to stay overnight again, 8 year old is the one who was most scared and says she does & doesn't want to stay (wants to but is frightened he'll get cross and is worried she'll want to come back and won't be able to) and the 6 year old (boy) is desparate to spend time with his dad and would love to stay. Prob because his dad favours him, makes the girls do chores etc and not him.
Sorry for waffling, just wanted to include as much relevant info as poss. I'm self-representing as not entitled to legal aid anymore.
Just need some advice on what to put on the form - I'm welcoming this court involvement as something needs sorting once and for all. Its the kids who are suffering.
As I said, this has been going on since August. He sees them individially once a week for 2 hours on a Tues teatime, a different child each week, so effectively they each see him once every 3 weeks. And sometimes that doesn't happen if he's away with work, but he only tells them the day before. He tells them directly, won't tell me. Over the Christmas holidays he had the children on two occasions for full days, consecutive days each time (2 days before Christmas, 2 days after). This was the first time he has had them for a whole day since August, and the first time he's had all 3 of them together since then. He doesn't attend parents evenings/assemblies/sports events and generally isn't very interested in their lives. I think his motivation for contact is reduced CSA payments.
Thanks in advance for any help, I really appreciate it.