A question about designating non-relatives as legal guardians for children

[aamia]

Is this just a simple matter of drawing up legal documents with a solicitor even if there are still living relatives? How would social services know about such arrangements if there were to be, say, a car accident in which both parents were killed but children weren't (say they were at school for example)?

Neither set of grandparents would be able to take on our DS (on one side there is a grandmother with dementia and a grandfather who cares for her; on the other there is a grandmother who is disabled and wouldn't cope with a young child, and a grandfather who is estranged from the family and barely able to keep the council out of his life due to the state in which he keeps his home). So - we have a good friend who lives round the corner, and is basically like family. She also needs someone for her kids so we were thinking of each naming the other as guardians for our children.

you can designate guardians for your children in a Will

As CountyDurhamLass says, you need to make a will appointing your friend as a guardian. At the same time, of course, you'd appoint executors (who look after your money), and their role would be to administer your money in a trust, and to give the guardians enough to maintain the children until they are grown up.

Lots of people appoint friends rather than family members as guardians for the reasons outlined in your post. The advantage is often that the children would be able to remain at the same school and in touch with their friends. I often write in a clause asking the guardian to encourage and facilitate direct and indirect contact between the children and their extended family.

If you're interested in making a will, I have a paid for advert over on the Small Business section of Mumsnet Classifieds titled "5* Will Writing Service Recommended by Mumsnetters".

Our friends are named as legal guardians in our will should anything happen to my DP and I. Two members of our family (one from each side) are named as the executors (in charge of the money).

Due to similar reasons to you, we prefer our friends over our family.

It was easy to do and cost me 135 quid for a joint will. It has eased my mind knowing that dd would be cared for by the right people in our eyes should the worse ever happened god forbid