Cohabitation restriction in a deferred equity order on divorce

[Caliente62]

My husband wants me to agree to a clause within our divorce financial settlement that means that he would be entitled to repayment of his deferred equity stake in the house if I were to cohabit with someone for more than six months. He says it is "standard" whereas, during mediation, I was told that judges are wary of such orders given that cohabitation is not a secure financial arrangement. Can anyone advise on the actual legal stance on this? I have spent so much money on our divorce, whereas ex is getting deferred legal aid, and I just can't afford any more legal work.

Thanks. xx

To be honest, from my experience it does vary from Court to Court. At my local CC the DJ was not happy about clauses with regards to cohabitation but I know in other areas some DJs will allow it.

Can you say what area you are in so that hopefully a 'local' family lawyer may be able to advise.

When I got divorced 6 years ago I was advised by my lawyer that this sort of condition was standard. Also that I would lose spousal maintenance if I cohabited.

Just refuse to agree, and insist on the realisation of his share when the children no longer need it. What's the likelihood you're going to be in a position to meet this obligation even if you are cohabiting for 6 months? Unlikely. It's unrealistic and controlling.

Certainly if you're paying for this process, you're entitled to put your view!

I have this clause in my divorce/financial arrangement but it is a year and in order to get his money exH has to apply to the court and prove that it would not effect the standard of living of the DC.
In other words I can cohabit or even marry a person with few assests/low income with no effect, but if I chose a wealthy bloke I would have to pay up.

i agree with babybarrister. in my experince courts do approve such clauses, but added protection may need to be given if the reason for the deferred sale/ transfer was to provide a home for DC

your solicitor will be able to advise you on this. If you don't have one, i would urge you to get advice before signing any financial consent order.

I live in the Southend area of Essex. Does anyone have any experience of the treatment of these clauses in this area?

I did have a solicitor but, due to the inundation of my solicitor by my ex's solicitor, my costs were £6k up to decree nisi stage and I could afford no more. Now doing it myself (and have to say more efficiently and supportively than my solicitor ever was). Will need to find a solicitor now but don't trust anybody!

"My husband wants me to agree to a clause within our divorce financial settlement"

I take it this is the offer, OP. In which case, refuse it. It is probably a standard clause thrown in to see whether you will agree or not. Despite what you are being told here, cohabitation is not a secure realtionship. That is a good reason to refuse to agree, so do it. On receipt of your refusal, they may back down anyway.

They're threatening taking me to court. My gut feeling is "bring it on" but the cost of it worries me. I have all the costs of household, children, work etc and have to pay legal costs. My ex, however, doesn't work and is in receipt of legal aid. Amazing.