Do I need to change my will?

[JumpingThroughMoreHoops]

Am I still an aunty?

DB, has a feckless irresponsible child who is now in his late 30's. He's spread his seed all over the place but always tried to control the mother of his eldest child.

That child is DBs grand daughter, my g/neice

Child has now been legally adopted by her step father (I suppose I should mention that her full blood brother was adopted years ago but the nephew wouldnt allow his daughter to be adopted)

Well, she's 16 now and made the choice to be her SFs legal daughter, which if my nephew wasn't such a nasty piece of manipulative work, would have happened years ago.

So my question is do I need to change my will - there is a bequest regarding my mothers jewelry : "I leave to my Great Niece, Mary Smith XYZ" - is the fact that Mary Smith mentioned by name enough for her to inherit via me, my mothers things? or have I got to pay to have my will re drafted

Secondly, there is no family animosity, DB is still her granddad, her birth father is still a wanker no one talks to but I sort of feel I've lost someone IYSWIM?

It doesn't sound as though you need to change it but I think most of us have heard of a horror story about this sort of thing and the rifts it can cause when someone dies...so I really think you need legal advice.

Do you have a free legal helpline as part of your home insurance or a bank account? If not, CAB could probably answer that for you.

You haven't lost anyone. Whatever relationship you had before she signed her name on legal papers, will still be the same once the ink has dried.

Unless you're contemplating trusts or something like that, you don't need to pay to have your will drafted - you can just write one. They're pretty straightforward once you get past the basic legal technicalities about executors, witnesses etc. (Our family tend to write wills pretty frequently so well versed: I'm just about to re-write mine and I know that DB is just about to persuade his older children to write theirs - a real rite of passage!)

Get a lawyer, though, if you're uneasy. They shouldn't be expensive if the will is to be straightforward and you do most of the drafting beforehand yourself - and WorraLiberty is right: when people die, there can be a powerful lot of animosity among family members about relatively mundane items, let alone significant bequests.

Doesn't sound to as if you need to change it by the way. Your intent is clear even if there may have been some changes in exact status - think of people suddenly getting married and/or changing names for instance. Wouldn't normally affect a testator's purpose.

I'd also agree that your relationship with her is the same as it ever was. If anyone is to be tentative about the situation, it would likely be her. If you just give her a phone, say, and invite her over for supper/a visit as normal it will reassure both of you.

PS - if you think she's a sensible youngster (eg would appreciate it and not flog it and buy shoes) why not start thinking about giving over some of the jewellery before you pop your clogs? I'm doing that - because, let's face it, I could go tomorrow as could all of us. And jewellery oftentimes looks better on younger people. (Depends on what it is of course.)

Can't you just amend it? Add an extra piece of paper that says "dn XYZ has now been adopted by K, but I still want her to inherit exactly as outlined in my will previously" get two people to witness you sgning it and done.

If you want to go down the solicitor route of will amending/writing, November is Will Aid. You get a properly done solicitor will for far cheaper than they'd usually charge you, and the money goes to charity. This works for will amendments too.

By properly done I mean they don't scrimp you because you aren't paying them, so you still get their full service. Not suggesting that home done wills aren't proper.

I have given her some pieces already, nothing expensive, and probably not to a young girls taste, but that was the general idea, that it would languish in her jewelry box until she's older

I was going to revamp our wills in 18 months when DS2 hits 18 and make him executor.

Thanks Bellyjaby. I was wondering whether there would be a new Will Aid around soon but neglected to mention.

Jumping - if you're looking to make DS2 an executor at 18, then I would recommend you get a solicitor involved and perhaps appoint the law firm as joint executors if your estate is in any way substantial (eg if there's a house involved.) I've been an executor on estates twice now and while it's really pretty straightforward, it can be tediously detailed and there can also be a lot of disharmony in any family which is....not uncomplicated. Might be a lot for, say, an 18-25 year old to handle if you pop your clogs sooner rather than later. A solicitor at his back could be a good idea.

I think, personally, that your existing will would probably be fine until that point.

PS - I was given good jewellery early by older relatives and although I may not have worn it as commonplace, I truly valued it. I may have lost or damaged some of the other stuff (as you do) but all of the good stuff was kept safely and prized. Stroked, even! (Just in case you were maybe a little put out that the pieces you've given over do not appear to be being worn.)

Sorry, CozieToesie but .... Yes appoint the 18 year old as Executor but not the Solicitors as Executor. If you do appoint them, the 18 year old will have no inpout into how things are done after you've died. The solicitors will take over everything and then charge an arm and a leg which will come out of the estate.

Wills are pretty straightforward to deal with if you take things a bit at a time. It would be better to have two Executors (18 year old and someone else in case the first one dies) and, when the time comes they can deal with as much as they can (there are idiots' guides on the internet). If they have bits they can't do, then ask a solciitor to deal with it. By employing them in this way, they just do what you ask and charge for that, not take over the whole thing.

Be careful though because witnesses are not allowed by law to benefit from Wills.

*input
*solicitor

I suppose it depends on the solicitor in question. We have our family solicitors who pretty well do what we say and charge only for that bit because they have continuing business with us. But yes, you're probably right - if the 18 year old (always think worst case with wills) is up to it and there's another person of integrity knocking around as backup. The great advantage of having a solicitor's firm that you know involved is that you don't have to actually worry that they all might pop their clogs in the same incident.

Hi, we've moved this into Legal Matters. Thanks.