Experience of going to court for contact please

[flowerycurtains]

My DP is just starting the process of going to court for contact with 2 out of 4 of his children.

He has been seperated for 6 years and has had his children live with him a third of the time since then, he pays over CSA maintenance plus pays for the majority of activities for the kids, we do all the running around including plenty outside of his contact time, his ex refuses to do any. His ex wife has been difficult since the beginning (she left him for someone else and I met him 2 years later - for the record) and is constantly sending him abusive messages and accusing him of all sort of untruths.

To cut a very long story short, she is now claiming emotional and physical abuse towards their son aged 13 and is his son is apparently saying he no longer wants contact with his Dad, much to the utter delight of his Mother. The Mum is also stopping contact with his youngest daughter aged 9 as she states she needs to protect her from my DP. He is having extremely limited contact with her literally only a few minutes a week now which is mainly phone contact and a few minutes once a fortnight with a family member before an activity.

The 2 eldest children continue to live with us a third of the time and in fact DSD2 aged 14 chooses to stay with us longer than that.

So, what is likely to happen in court? I understand they will see some sort of "mediator" initially (they have already tried "normal" mediation). She claims to have contacted the police and social services but we have never heard anything from them. My DP contacted them and they said they had no case to pursue.

I would like to know how much stalling she is likely to be able to do, are cafcass going to be involved and if so, what happens? Can he get better interim contact put in place? His solicitor is telling him that it will be straightforward and should take about 6 - 8 weeks, but I'm a bit cynical it will be that easy.

The courts should send someone round to talk to the children. IME it is extremely unlikely that your DP will be refused access.
The courts are very used to Ex partners making stories up. Also the fact that his other children live with him is a big plus.

It's a horrible time and my heart goes out to you and him.

At the first hearing it's usual to meet a CAFCASS officer so see if any agreement might be reached. If no agreement is reached you go in front of the judge who will decide what information the court requires to assist in making a decision, sets a timetable for future hearings and when it's deemed appropriate orders interim contact.

Information (when it's required) is in the form of reports. Sometimes the reporter just ascertains children's wishes and feelings. Other times when there are welfare concerns CAFCASS or social services carry out more in-depth reports to find out more about the background.

Thanks for the replies.

Is it really CAFCASS who are the "mediators" before court? My DP solicitor told him CAFCASS don't get involved until later.

How long is it likely to be between the initial meeting and the court hearing?

DP's ex wife has (after 2 months of withholding all contact) announced today that she is willing to re-instate contact BUT DSD4 is "too frightened" to come back. Funnily enough, she wasn't "frightened" of us when she was living with us a third of the time. [SAD]

So, assuming that DSD aged 9 is saying that she is scared of us, how much "weight" will be given to that by the court?

How did he get on in court with child saying they are scared?

Sadly you are right to be cynical about a 6 - 8 week time estimate.

I was at Court yesterday on the final hearing of a contact application that was made over 2 years ago. There were numerous delays, several hearings which were adjourned for various reasons including CAFCASS being sick then on holiday and not notifying the Court. Very very long drawn out proceedings and a very unsatisfactory result for all involved. I hope your DP manages to resolves things and get the best result for the DC but please be warned, it may be a long hard slog.

Is it really CAFCASS who are the "mediators" before court? My DP solicitor told him CAFCASS don't get involved until later.

There is now a requirement that parents in most circumstances attend a Mediation Information & Assessment Meeting before the courts will hear a case.

At the first hearing it is seen if any agreement can be reached before the judge makes any directions. Usually it is the CAFCASS duty officer who meets the parents before they go in front of the judge.

When there is no agreement the judge may then ask CAFCASS to carry out checks and/or reports to be carried out later.