you ned some legal advice so that if needs be you can present to court - jsut settin out a statment what you have said would be clear enough .
in partiucalr in relation to teh needs of your disabled child.
given he has other houses he can live in /sell then your argument would be he should leave the euity in the current house and you and dc should live there til both chidlren become indepdneent - if your sn child does not becom indpendent this could b long term dont put an age limit on it !
TOLATA is about who owns what but you ahve strong case underchildrens c schedule one to remain the house and his share of equity to be kept in trus under childrens name or his charge in property keep until both leave home.
ask court for thei pro bono uit hwo can help you draft a statement correctly - beg or booorw the court costs (about £120 ??) to submit an application under childrens act for you to remian in house with the DC .
you probably will need to find few hundrd pounds to get conveyancer to sort out with land registry his charge etc but if you cant pay barister/sol then you can still go to court -
keep all communcaitionw ith him via email so you ahve a record. remain polite yourself.
as he has other properties he isn homeless right?
state that you wish to reside in property which has been specially addapted until boh children can leave home and at that point he can ahve his share of equity.
if he is threatening get some legal avice enough for you to file at court under childrens act that you wish to remain in property for the children highlighting the disability adaptations etc.
if he files under TOLATa to sell you can simply refute and give all reasons why you and dc should stay - that is straightforward and any judge should see that you and dc should stay albeit wih exp having chargge on property til they leave home .