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Original poster

child access and transport

18 replies

IanD · 23/05/2012 20:28

hi my partner has a son who visits his father every other weekend its a long distant visit which has worked well for the past 3 years, recently my partner passed her test so i added her to my insurance and now drives my car, my partners ex has now seen her driving my car so has told her hes taking her to court to share the driving distance does he have a case if its not her car? we are not married nor do we live together..

any thoughts?

OP posts:
titchy · 23/05/2012 22:25

Going to court seems like taking a sledgehammer to crack a nut but.... Why shouldn't she do her bit of the travelling, public transport or otherwise? Or did her ex move away?

Original poster
IanD · 23/05/2012 22:32

hi titch yes its about a 100 mile journey so bus is out of the question dont you think?

OP posts:
titchy · 23/05/2012 22:41

Train? Bus might be fun for her boy though? Clearly if she has no car of her own he can't make her drive (although she could hire a car), but I don't see why he should always be the one doing the traveling.

Original poster
IanD · 23/05/2012 22:49

not sure if train is the answer either as my partner would spend half the night getting back home as her exs contact starts at 5pm on the friday, hiring a car would be way over her budget giving her financial problems, would the courts actually make any of this possible?

OP posts:
OldLadyKnowsNothing · 23/05/2012 22:56

The courts can't order her to drive your car, that would be a nonsense. But it is unfair to expect her not to shoulder some of the expenses and time involved.

Original poster
IanD · 23/05/2012 22:59

how would she shoulder some of the expenses if she hasnt got the finances?

OP posts:
OldLadyKnowsNothing · 23/05/2012 23:01

I don't know, I have no idea about her finances, or how she manages them. Who moved 100 miles away?

Original poster
IanD · 23/05/2012 23:10

her ex moved away its a tricky situation but hes caused this problem and what i thinks happened is fuel prices have soared and hes now looking for a way out, but our immediate concern is what the court will decide

OP posts:
OldLadyKnowsNothing · 23/05/2012 23:12

How likely is it really that he'll actually go to court? Are the current arrangements by court order, or by mutual agreement? Does he pay the child maintenance that he should?

Sorry to throw so many questions at you, not trying to be hostile.

Original poster
IanD · 23/05/2012 23:19

i would say 99% certain he'll take it to court, the current arrangement he agreed to when the court order was made dont think anything is in writing though, he does pay maintenance yes

im not sure how a court can make my partner travel without any sensible means of transport

OP posts:
OldLadyKnowsNothing · 23/05/2012 23:26

Can't see how there would be a court order but nothing in writing? Confused Are you sure there's a court order?

Anyway, if he's rich enough to go back to court (or skint enough to get Legal Aid) the court will look at all of the circumstances presented to them by each party. If he's rich enough, and your dp is skint, it's unlikely the court would order that she take on some of the expenses. If he's skint enough to get LA, and your dp is in reasonable paid employment, they might order that she must. What you/she sees as "without any sensible means of transport" when public transport is possible (even if exhausting and expensive), the court might see quite differently.

But I think what you're really asking is, "can the court order my dp to use my car?" And no, they can't.

Original poster
IanD · 23/05/2012 23:34

the access is in the order but it was verbally agreed that he'd do the travelling,

as i said its a tricky situation, public transport can also be unreliable, they are both skint and he wont get legal aid, thanks for your input i agree she hasnt got a car so that is out of the question

OP posts:
OldLadyKnowsNothing · 24/05/2012 02:31

If he won't get LA but is skint anyway, would he/can he (as in, is he capable of, not allowed to) self-rep in court? Because "I saw her driving a car" would be a piss-poor argument for changing the status quo.

I think you (and your dp) have nothing to fear.

Original poster
IanD · 24/05/2012 07:44

he has the arrogance to self rep it seems to me that his ex has turned her life around passed her test to help her son and hes trying to feed off her hard work,when he caused this situation he basically doesnt want to face up to his responsibility..

OP posts:
Happylander · 24/05/2012 16:59

My ex took me to court for this and lost. If he moved away then it is up to him to do drop offs and pick ups. Basically the view was he made the decision to leave so he has to face the consequences.

If he does take her to court then I suggest she comes up with some reasons not to drive i.e. financial cost, it is not her car and she only rarely uses it, not sure if she works but if she does she can use that e.g. is trying to do extra work at weekends or if not working she can just say she is trying to find work at weekends and driving would hinder this.

He won't win as it is not her car but let him waste his money and then it will get written into court order that he has to do drop offs and pick ups like mine has.

Original poster
IanD · 24/05/2012 21:27

Hi happy lander this is pretty much our thought on it as well there's so many obstacles in the way plus the situation has been made 100% by him lets hope the courts see sense train and bus just seem ridiculous

OP posts:
AnyoneForTennis · 07/06/2012 19:52

He pays maintenance?

He probably thinks she has cash spare for driving lessons so can afford it

Original poster
IanD · 07/06/2012 20:41

Not sure what you mean I was asking about courts and my car

OP posts:
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