Weird one this, probably going to get flamed, but need serious advice, because its a serios concern.

[gigglepin]

After years and years of fil running up credit card debt, and mil digging them out with good budgeting, careful planning and then 5 years ago taking full control of thier finances, they have been debt free.

MIL gives fil an allowance of £10 per week to get his papers etc.
He works about 40 hours a week, she does not due to health issues.

He cannot be trusted with money at all.

MIL is now terminally ill. BIL lives with them & has taken over the bills, and running household expenses. There will bil & fil wage going in when she has gone.

The family is naturally very veyr worried, that fil will just go wild when she has gone as she has always kept a very tight leash on him. They are worried that there will be debt collectors knocking, the house will be at risk, and that they will be left to sort out fils debt as mil has had to do.

Is there anything they can do to protect everything?
MIL intends on re-doing her will as soon as possible, what should she specify in it?
She (God love her) is spending her final weeks/months worried to death about this.
Any advice on this weird one is gratefully recieved.(will be seeing a solicitor anyway, but guidance is what i seek for now)
Thankyou.

DH is speaking with them all today to establish his dads opinion.

He may consider that bil should take over the finances.

Never thought it would come to this, its all so very sad and distressing. Not to mention ugly

I don't mean to sound harsh, but if it was my dad I would just let him do what he wanted. Let him deal with the consequences!
Hes a grown man, if he want's to rack up debt, and lose his family in the process then that show's what sort of man he is. I would not want anything to do with him. And I would certainly not be bailing him out when he come's knocking on my door because he's lost his house.

I'm sorry, but I can't see anyway it can be stopped, apart from him agreeing to hand over his earning's and accept a allowance while someone else pays the bills, and even then he still isn't going to learn.

Bear in mind that the trustees in bankruptcy can overturn an agreement to put a house in trust for children if it is seen to be a way of avoiding paying debt now or in the future. If FIL is working & paying mortgage it will be seen as his asset.

MIL needs to leave whatever assets she has bar the house to children if that is what she wishes.

Hi sparky, as i said earlier in the thread, the only choice we will have is to cut all contact with fil once mil has gone.

We will NOT be picking up any of his shit.

Sorry, I think I went off abit . I have experience with a selfish parent, I just can't understand how some people can be like that, especially when they have children.

I feel for you, it must be horrible, especially as its causing upset to your mil in her last weeks :(

Unless he wants help then I can't really see what you can do. Especially if everything they have is joint owned. Good luck and I hope it all works out!

Something not entirely dissimilar in my family. There's not a lot you can do. The only worry is if he hooks up with an unsuspecting other woman/women/ bar acquaintances who he then gouges money out of, and I'm afraid I think this is a likely scenario in the future. I have occasionally had mad ideas such as taking out a full-page advert in the local paper with a photo of my relative saying 'DON'T BELIEVE A WORD THIS PERSON SAYS AND DON'T GIVE THEM ANY MONEY' but you can't, can you? Ultimately your FIL and people he come into contact with are adults.

Listen to Xenia on this, I think her advice is the soundest.