Horrible letter from head teacher

[isitwineoclockyet]

I don't want to out myself by giving too much info, but I have been attempting to talk to my child's school about how the anti-bullying policy is implemented. Our head is notoriously difficult to talk to, and frequently responds very defensively to parents with issues. I did get plenty of people to proof-read the letters, and whilst they were borne of some frustration about not being able to get any answers from the school, I am confident that they're not rude, aggressive or in any way offensive (I'm afraid you'll have to take my word for that though!)
This morning I have received a reply (timed to arrive after the start of the holidays, presumably) stating that in 2008 a parent removed a child from the school because I was verbally aggressive towards her. Again, you'll have to take my word for this, but I have never, ever approached someone else's child. I have never taken matters into my own hands in this way, and even where I am good friends with the parents, I always leave school to resolve issues that arise in school. In any case, I would have thought that had a parent made a complaint like this, the school would have warned me, or banned me from the premises. Absolutely nothing of the kind has ever happened, & until this morning, no one has ever suggested before that my behaviour in or around the school has been a problem.
I am so upset and angry. I presume this letter will stay on my daughter's file, in which case other professionals could read this & conclude that I am some kind of nutter (honestly - i am so non-confrontational it's untrue!). I assume the head wants me to quietly backdown regarding the bullying (which I feel has not been addressed), or maybe he's hoping to provoke me into removing my child (the school is huge, with some VERY large class sizes)
I really need some advice. Do I have to just take this, and if not, what can I do about it?

Thanks.

foi act is it a state school?

Is it libellous if the letter is placed in the childs school records where other members of staff can read it and behave differently towards the child or parent?

Basically OP must write to the Head asking him to substantiate his claim or to withdraw it and erase any mention of it in the childs records. It's also only libellous if its not true, and unless proved otherwise, OP should suggest to the head that she will sue for libel.

She won't of course unless she is a millionaire!

Weird Head Teacher

Sorry for very brief hijack..
Duelingfanjo or sneezecakesmum (if you clever ladies are still there)..

Do you know if, under the FOI act, you request to see you're DCs records, and there is something incorrect in them that is libellous, can you request a copy as proof?

Otherwise presumably the original documents could be 'amended' by the school, if you were to go to a solicitor..

Sneezecakesmum and Jellykat - I suspect this letter won't go into the child's records. However, to see the records you would be making a Data Protection Act request on behalf of the child which means you will receive a copy of everything they hold. Public bodies such as schools are required to treat FoI requests as DPA requests where appropriate.

Even if the letter does go into the child's records that doesn't make it a clear cut case of libel. The letter may be covered by qualified privilege. You would need to consult a lawyer who specialises in libel to be sure. If it is covered by qualified privilege you would only succeed with a libel action if you could show that the head teacher made the allegations out of malice.

Just to explain privilege a little more, there are two types of privilege. Proceedings in Parliament and the courts are covered by absolute privilege, as are reports of those proceedings made at the time provided they are fair and accurate. Absolute privilege is a complete defence against any action for libel or slander so you cannot, for example, sue an MP based on something he has said in the House of Commons, nor can you sue someone based on evidence they gave as a witness in a court case.

Qualified privilege applies in a far wider range of circumstances where, in essence, it is accepted that people need to be able to express themselves freely even if that means a third party is libelled or slandered. It applies, for example, where an employer is giving a reference relating to an existing or past employee. There is, however, no full list of the situations in which it applies. If a communication is protected by qualified privilege you have to prove that the allegations were made out of malice if you want to prove libel or slander.

jellycat, I am pretty sure they HAVE to let you see it. Don't know about making copies but I would think it's your right. they have something like 20 days to respond.

yhere's some info here it says "You should ask for a copy of all the information they hold about you"

however it also says this "Can the organisation withhold any information?

Yes. There are some circumstances where the information you have asked for contains information that relates to another person. Unless the other person gives their permission, or it is reasonable in all the circumstances to provide the information without permission, the organisation is entitled to withhold this information" which may mean they can't or won't give you the info :(

Thank you DF and prh !

I have had a suspicion that there is something odd in my DS2s school records for a while - things like the headmasters comment (v. negative) at the end of DS2s annual report, did not tally with any of the teachers comments (v.positive), and the head of year suggested to him last week, that they 'don't want naughty boys like him in their school' when DS2 hasn't been in any trouble. [confused}

Something is awry. I shall definitely use the info above to check it out!

Thank you again.. Best of luck OP, apologies once again for hijack.

Thanks to everyone who's provided information and support. I don't know how to contact the chair of governors other than through the school, though I suppose I have no choice other than to take that route.

I kind of want it all to go away, but then I assume the head is depending on his letter making me feel that way.

Could you get the chair of governors details off the school website and then dig around a bit for an address if its not on there?

If not, I would send the letter via the school, but ask for an acknowledgement of the letter so that you know it has been passed on. This way would also let the head know that you will not be going away and ignoring this.

I'm a bit puzzled byt this bit in your OP, IIWOY - could you say any more?

"but I have never, ever approached someone else's child. I have never taken matters into my own hands in this way, and even where I am good friends with the parents, I always leave school to resolve issues that arise in school."

I asked that too!

Sorry, feenie - I didn't notice you had!

Great minds n that

You are going to have to get legal advice on this IMHO.

Its slanderous and needs responding to.

IME letters to the HT should ALWAYS be cc'd to the Board of Governors.

I see what prh47 is getting at re the privilege thing. Was only joking re libel action - you need to be v. v. rich to sue. But if isitwine asks to see the record and the letter is there somewhere surely the Head can be asked to prove the allegation.

Any significant incident where a child is removed because of another parent would have paperwork/file etc? It's outrageous for the Head to make an unfounded allegation like this without proof that the 'alleged' incident was investigated. If this incident is true why wasn't the Op asked to provide her side of the story at the time? tbh the whole thing smells very fishy.

From my experience of qualified privilege it has to be provable that there is a justifiable reason why the information is not conveyed to the interested parties. My only contact is in child abuse cases where the interests of the child outweighs the parents' right to information. In the OPs case I can't see a justifiable reason why an apparently unfounded claim which has been kept from the OP would come under this heading.

Sorry, to those who asked for clarification - I only meant that I expect the school to deal with anything that happens in school. I didn't mean I follow the parents in order to abuse them just outside the gate! I guess it should read "I leave it to the school to resolve issues" not "I leave the school to resolve issues"

Sneezecakesmum - that was exactly my thought. I know I've never done anything like the head is saying I did. I can't state with 100% certainty that another parent didn't say I was abusive to her or her daughter, but I had no contact from the school at the time & knew nothing about this until yesterday morning. Surely if another parent had said that, the school should have looked in to it, & if appropriate, banned me from the grounds or warned me against speaking to her again?

I don't know... My head is spinning. It just seems such a dishonest and unethical way for a head teacher to behave. It worries me that he must think he can get away with it, & that makes me wonder what else he might be capable of. I know that sounds really melodramatic, but it should be a fairly simple thing to establish the truth of, so why would he commit to paper something he can't substantiate?

Aside from the insinuation that another parent removed their child because you were aggressive to that parent, what does he say about the bullying? There are two things here - the allegation (which doesn't seem to have legs in that the deed is done) and the matter of ongoing bullying. I would reply, stating you have no recollection of that incident and you don't see its relevance three years on.

He says the bullying's been looked in to, some kids have denied it, child can report it to various teachers if anything happens again. He says any future complaints will be handled in accordance with the anti-bullying policy.

He makes no attempt to address the main point of our letter, which is that the policy says all sorts of things about raising self-esteem (which our daughter desperately needs), & we'd like them to talk to us about how this can be done.

As it happens, there was a fairly serious incident on Friday involving my child (who was physically hurt), and I believe the parents of another child were called into school over it. We didn't know anything about it until later on, as our child went home with a friend. I'm assuming this letter had already been sent when that happened, as it's dated the previous day, but the school made no attempt that we know of to tell us our child had been injured by another child during the school day...

I would write back to the head and

1. raise the same points that he didn't respond to from the first letter.
2. state that you feel that he has been unprofessional in raising the other issue of which you are completely unaware of and why is it relevant to question (s) you have asked
3. Copy it to the chair and include the other letters.

I would pretend that you don't realise that he is trying to bully you.

Has he told you the name of the child that left the school ? If do do you actually know the child or remember any incidents?

I agree with contacting the Chair of Govs as soon as possible as it sounds like the head is going to deal with this properly. Do you have a copy of the anti bullying policy ?

Sorry if I've missed it but sort of school is it - state? primary ?

Surely there can't be that many kids who've left? Can't you work out who he's talking about?

I'd put a fiver on the head having entirely invented this 'other child'. He's just trying to intimidate the OP.

You can ask one of the Parent Governors who the Chair is or find out via the Local Authority - you could also find out who the Clerk to the Governors is and send the letter via the Clerk if you really can't find out who the Chair is - but it shouldn't be that difficult.

The Chair of governor's name should be on the school website.

Contact the council unless school is is grant aided (ie religious) or private.