Verbal / Written access agreements ?

[Gster]

I'm currently trying to agree with my ex access to my DD 2.

I am concerned ( with good reason ) that she will slide from any agreement and introduce obstacles to any agreed access. I.e. sign DD up for Saturday classes making it difficult during my weekends with DD as we live in different areas.

I've heard that I may need to make an application to the court for defined contact & a specific issue order.

But I'd like to keep things as civil as possible, was wondering if there is anything less confrontational. Less scary than a court document, more solid than a verbal agreement?

Go for a contact order to stop her messing you about. Then you both know where you stand for when and where.

Scribbles on a post-it note can be ignored easily and without comeback.

you dont need to go to court til you tried other things first!

downlaod and fill in a parenting plan you both sign - discuss in mediation / with third party if you need to download

www.cafcass.gov.uk/PDF/FINAL%20web%20version%20251108.pdf

or other ones eg

www.justmediation.co.uk/Portals/1/ppeng.pdf

www.jump-parenting.org.uk/documents/JUMPJewishParentingPlansBooklet-FINAL15Dec06PlansTemplate.pdf

I would be interested to know of people who have used these and if it has worked for them. What happens when one parent changes their mind or disagrees?

You probably wouldn't get a contact order anyway if it's all agreed. There is something called the 'no order' principle. The state thinks it's heavy handed to tell parents what to do, so contact orders are only made when there is disagreement, or it is needed in the interest of the child.

cestlavielife has it right.

The problem is I'm almost certain my XP is trying to get my DD into a Saturday school behind my back ( I have PR so she's ignoring my rights ) thus making any weekend visits, DD at my home, difficult. So I'm trying to cover myself.