Advice about guardianship.

[Lehardanlass]

I'm not sure if I'm posting in the right 'topic' but:

My younger sister is terminally ill and in a hospice. A year ago (when diagnosed) she made me legal guardian of her two children (10 & 8). They moved in with my family four months ago as my sister has been too ill to care for them.

Their father has not been involved in their lives for nearly seven years and has severe alcohol problems.

She's always ensured they keep in touch with his family, I've continued the fortnightly visits to his parents/sister. However last weekend his sister took me aside to tell me that as my sister is not expected to live much longer her parents are consulting a solicitor with a view to getting custody of the children.

They've never lived with anyone other than my sister and I, are quite settled in my family - well as much as they can be under the circumstances.

I've spoken to a solicitor who says that as my sister is no longer considered 'of sound mind' it will be up to the courts to decide where the children live.

I just want to know if anyone has been through similar circumstances and has any advice a)where we go from here and b)the best way to break it to the children.

Sorry this is long, thanks in advance.

But when she was 'of sound mind' (not to say that she isn't now) she made you the childrens legal guardian - who did the legal bit for that ?

I'm sure that even if the childrens grandparents did try to get custody, the fact that your sister wanted the children to be with you and have been living happily with you would be all that the courts would want to know

I'm so sorry that they are making a hard time for you all worse

Thanks for your reply. I haven't spoken to the solicitor handling my sister's affairs as she is not available until next week, maybe the partner I spoke to didn't have all the facts but I'm just worried the children are going to have to leave us.

I really don't think it would be in their best interests as with us they are still surrounded by their friends, same school etc whereas their grandparents live a distance away.

What do you mean when you say that she made you legal guardian? What legal formalities were complied with? This is important, as we have to understand what your legal position is now.

I really think you ought to take proper advice from a solicitor.

Sorry for taking so long to reply, trying to keep things running smoothly here!

Basically she was advised by social services to go through a solicitor, we had lots of interviews and background checks and then a court hearing which said we could be legal guardians. We've been responsible for them for quite a while and they moved in 4 months ago in preparation for my sister going to the hospice.

I thought that was the end of it, all settled but I'm worried that the children could be taken away if the grandparents apply for custody.

My sister is not aware of what's going on because she's too ill and the last thing we want is to worry her. I'm just really worrying now as someone I spoke to at the school said the grandparents would have more rights where the children are concerned :(

If ss have been involved and it all went through court, then I can't see how there would be any risk at all of the children being sent to anyone else. They'd have to prove you were unfit - and obv ss don't think that.

It would be different if nothing formal had been set up, but it sounds like everything was tied up properly

Thanks for reassuring me. I suppose stress is making me worry about things more.

I just hope nothing happens with this. I think the children are going through enough without more stress.

Thank you

I take it then that you have a Special Guardianship Order? This is one step short of adoption. Tell the grandparents to flush their heads down the toilet.

The Grandparents are very unlikely to be granted a variation of the SGO. If they make an application, the Court will have to consider whether it is in the children's best interest to be uprooted from your family, their school, friends etc. The general, albeit unwritten first principle is to keep the status quo unless there is a compelling reason to change it.

Agree with Resolution.

The age factor would also be taken into consideration, grandparents are likely to be much older than you and long term less likely to be around. As you are maintaining contact they can't object to 'losing' them. There is also the factor of maintaining the status quo for children who will be v fragile due to their mothers condition.

Good luck

Thank you all for answering. I've been in contact with my sister's solicitor and apparently the guardianship order would only be reviewed if there was concern for their welfare. It's a huge relief.

My sister died on Saturday so they have enough to contend with without worries about having to move. Now we just have to get them through as best we can.

Thanks again for your help.

very sorry for you all, glad that at least you do not have this worry

Hello Lehardanlass, just wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss.

Thank you both. In a way it's a relief that it's over for her, it's just awfully final and somehow harder that she was only 36.