Changing Child's Surname Advice

[2bubs4me]

I walked out on my EX partner due to Domestic Abuse in March 2009 and he has PR of my DD and when I left him I was only about 4weeks pregnant with another baby. But he told me he didn't care if I aborted the baby or kept it as he couldn't change our daughter's nappy let alone feed her. So anyhow my DS has been born and is now 15mths yet my EX partner has no PR on my DS as he hasn't giving a shit since he was born. I am now with a new partner and my new partner is going to be adopting both my children.

Now my DS has my surname and I know I could go and change his surname to that of my DP but whereas my DD I couldn't as I would need permission from the EX. Although I have sent letters through a solicitor his mum says he doesn't live there and that she doesn't know where he is.

Now according to deed poll if the EX has been out of my DD's life for over 13mths [which now it is 20mths] and pays no maintenance [Which I have never recieved a penny] and I don't know of his whereabouts I can have it done!

Is there anyone else that has been in a similar position that could give me some advice?

TIA xx

Sorry - you can't do it. Deed Poll is an archaeic method of name change. Having practiced in family law for 18 years I have never done one. A simple change of name deed is all you need.

There is no such thing as a deed poll law. The father of DD has parental responsibility for him and therefore must consent to any name change. If he fails to consent you can apply to the court for a change of name.

Best practice if you want to change the name of DS is to notify the father first anyway.

If you are applying for adoption of both children anyway you can change their name upon an adoption order being made. The father would have to be notified of any adoption application, and indeed for DD he will be a Respondent to the application as he has PR.

Thank You hun!

I know all the legal terms and stuff that goes with the adoption as spoken to an adoption worker!

But I have tried to get in touch with the EX and before I have a chance to tell why Im ringing he tells me to f*ck off or hangs up on me.

I have no way of tracing him down at all!

The guidance from courts is that consent from all those with PR should be sought before changing a child's name. Although there is no statute law that prevents someone with PR acting unilaterally the other parent can apply to court for an order to regulate PR. It is then possible to prevent the name from being changed if it is known about in advance, or to have the name changed back.

You can apply for the courts permission to change the name and if necessary the courts can find the father's address through government records.

And how much does that cost? As I don't work x

Only you can decide whether changing the name is a priority. Check with the HM Court Services website or your local court to see if you are exempt from court fees and you can represent yourself in court. However, you need to be aware that courts tend to take the view that a child's identity is important and their surname is part of that so there is a reluctance to change a name, particularly if the new relationship isn't deemed yet well established.

Me and the new partner have been together for 16mths now and are getting wed

You could always have your new partner apply for parental responsibility (a recent but little used development in the law).

he is going to be but according to the council it would have to go thru a adoption process

He can apply for PR without applying for adoption.

how does that work if you dont mind me asking, i thought i would have to go through the courts! in regards to my daughter.

but even though my sons birth certificate father bit has been left blank and only me having PR on it. I want my DP on his certificate ie have PR what would be the best cause of action to take?

You can apply for PR but require the permission of all those currently holding PR, or a court order. So he would be fine with your DS but not your DD, if I read your posts right. You don't need to be on a birth certificate to have PR - I have PR for my stepchildren but no adoption required! (My husband XW died, so we didn't have to do this through the courts, which would otherwise have been the case - you have my sympathies).

Alternatively, although potentially no cheaper, you could apply for a residency order for you and your new partner, which would confer PR on him.

You would apply for a PR order for DS and enter into a PR agreement for DD (bearing in mind the established good practice of notifying the father before you enter into the PR agreement.

If PR is all you are applpying for you will need to get from the court a C1 form, complete it, and send it in to court with your fee of £200. I'd recommend you see a solicitor first though.

But what happens if she doesn't have the funds for it, or she can't track the father down who has PR for the DD, is there anything else that she could do?

Sorry - in my last post I should have said PR agreement for DS and order for DD.
If she doesn't have the funds she can apply to be exempt from court fees, but the eligibility criteria are tight.
If father of DD can't be tracked down the court can order the DWP to supply his address. The court then serves the paperwork upon him. STIDW mentioned this earlier.