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Legal matters

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Original poster

my husband is rmovin items from the house

23 replies

kieranic · 26/10/2010 11:56

hi aali wonder if someone can tell me my legal position.

my husband left the house several months ago after having an affair and is now demanding that igive him te flat screen tv and one of the setees from the living room and if i dont he is threatning to take things like dd laptop that she was given for xmas as he paid for it!!!!

where will this stop it sems that he is seting up huse with all the furniture that we built up together.

what can i do????

OP posts:
StewieGriffinsMom · 26/10/2010 12:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
kieranic · 26/10/2010 12:11

thanks tat great really new to all this and not sure hat to do and i think that he is using that against me ashe has been divorced before. i am just getting so angry now as i have just paid off 900 pounds worth of payday loans tha he took out nmy name to spend on the affair.

OP posts:
nocake · 26/10/2010 13:02

While it would be wrong for him to take things that belong to your DD the issue of who owns the furniture is less clear cut.

Anything you do now will affect how he behaves in future towards you. If you hit him with legal documents from a solicitor he will hit back and it will get nasty. If you talk to him and try to come to an amicable solution you're setting the groundwork for a more amicable future.

I know this isn't a popular view among many people on here but you have a child with this man so you can never disconnect yourself from him entirely. Establishing an amicable relationship with give and take both ways will pay dividends for you in the future.

Original poster
kieranic · 26/10/2010 16:47

thanks for all the great advice but there will only be amicablity if i give in to everything he wants.

OP posts:
babybarrister · 26/10/2010 20:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
kieranic · 26/10/2010 21:27

thanks for all advice he has since advised that all he wants is the tv and i have a meeting with my solicitor on Friday.

OP posts:
DancingHippoOnAcid · 27/10/2010 14:18

Is he not worried that he committed fraud by taking out loans in your name?

Original poster
kieranic · 27/10/2010 20:53

he thinks that i wont do anything about it but if he keeps pushing me i will speaking to lawyer about it on friday

OP posts:
DancingHippoOnAcid · 27/10/2010 23:36

Never mind a lawyer, speak to the police.

nocake · 29/10/2010 11:31

Are you joking daninghippo? What are the police going to do? He's taking stuff that belongs to him (or at least is shared ownership) so there's nothing they can, or will, do. If he's violent or threatens the OP then they can take action but he isn't doing anything illegal.

When my ex and I split up we both stayed in the house while we tried to sort out splitting everything up. My ex and her solicitor refused to discuss sharing possessions (TBH they refused to discuss pretty much anything) so when I did move out I simply took the stuff I wanted. Her solicitor sent me a couple of stroppy letters but I was completely within my legal rights and when our divorce ended up in court the judge didn't care at all that I'd taken stuff from the house. I should add that I made sure I left enough stuff for my ex to continue living in the house and nothing that was hers.

If my ex had been prepared to discuss it, like sensible adults do, then we could have come to an agreement on who had what.

colditz · 29/10/2010 11:35

Change the locks.

DancingHippoOnAcid · 29/10/2010 11:42

nocake - I was talking about the fact that the Op's DH took out loans in her name without her knowledge. That is fraud. Believe me, the police WILL be interested in that.

nocake · 29/10/2010 14:24

Sorry, I misunderstood and you're quite correct.

DancingHippoOnAcid · 29/10/2010 16:18

OP, have you spoken to the police about his fraud? I can't see why you should pay off loans he has taken out fraudulently in your name.

I would demand the £900 back from your ex or else bring charges against him. Does he realise the seriousness of what he did?

Original poster
kieranic · 29/10/2010 17:29

hi all thanks for all the advice

i have avoided going to the police as it would have an adverse effect on my son.

he is fully aware of the damage i could cause infact when i mentioned a visit to the police station he all of a sudden was very compliable to signing over the lease to the house.

he is aware that if he starts a war that i will win and is afraid i will bring the girlfriend into this as i believe that he may have used her pc to get them.

have spoken to my lawyer today and decided to give hime a chance to pay this back before going down to the station.

Also trying to get 800 quid in unpaid rent and ct back from him as i ahve paid the last 2 months whilst he was still on the lease.

OP posts:
DancingHippoOnAcid · 29/10/2010 18:36

kieranic - I think that is the most sensible thing to do.

Just make sure you keep your evidence safe in case you need to give him a little push to toe the line in the future.

Sorry you got mixed up with such a charmer but well done on getting him out of your life

Original poster
kieranic · 29/10/2010 19:02

thank you for your kind words dancinghippoonacid it not always easy especaillay as he thinks pushing me is keeping me where he wants in case things go wrong with her but if he thinks thst he is in for a VERY VERY BIG SHOCK.

OP posts:
DancingHippoOnAcid · 29/10/2010 19:13

Stay strong, kieranic.

You have him on the back foot, well done. I doubt if he will try to steamroller you now.

Original poster
kieranic · 29/10/2010 19:20

fingers crossed that i can stay strong when he is trying to ensure that i fall back down. will keep u updated

OP posts:
Original poster
kieranic · 01/11/2010 20:51

been at solicitors last friday so here is the update

dh is in for a wee shock this week as i am now looking for another 800 pounds in unpaid rent and council tax that he is going to be told to pay up. lease came through in my name and he has to hand back all keys he has and has to stay away from the house and since he has been to pick up the last of his stuff today (while i was at work i might add) he will not be able to remove anyth ing else yeha.

Should get his letter later this week and i know he wont call me as ow is up to see his new house.

OP posts:
Original poster
kieranic · 08/11/2010 20:11

upadte on new developments are

1 new lease came and he has handed over the keys yeha
2 cant keep new house as council wont give him housing benefit haha
3 knows im thinking of going to police about loans and is terrified
4 is moving to dumfries with other woman so wont be trying to see me on false pretences as he will be 3 hours away.

so all in all things going good

OP posts:
chandra · 08/11/2010 20:18

I would make sure the solicitor leaves some trail of evidence on the existence of those unauthorised loans, just in case there are other more around you are not aware of.

Original poster
kieranic · 08/11/2010 20:26

thanks chandra i will make sure of that

OP posts:
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