moving on to a sofa bed downstairs....mad?

[mummag]

we have three dc, aged ds8, dd 6 and nearly 3ds2. At the moment dd has a little room to herself,we are in the next sized up room and the boys share the biggest (not huge) bedroom. The boys dont seem to be capable of sharing, they argue and fight and never play in there. Sleep wise the youngest never really sleeps in his bed! tho we want that to change. My question is this, should we move downstairs to allow them all there own space and that way also all the toys could stay upstairs? What would you do. We dont have a separate dining room so would have to have a sofa bed. i was up for it but am having a huge change of heart and want to know how other people have found this experience. We cannot afford to move, extend or convert loft......

First of all, whatever you decide it's not forever! So don't worry about changing and changing back.

But have you tried other combinations of the children? Maybe the younger two together for sleeping, but as they are for playing, or make the smallest room the shared playroom, and all 3 sleep in one room? (but that might be madness!) Hope you find a good solution.

I would definitely not give up your bedroom - in teenage years you might end up with no personal space at all - not good.

I would try moving the dc's around to get them to share with a different sibling -you can tell them its a year's trial, not for ever, and after a while, they might choose to share with a different sibling.

I believe it is good for children to learn to share space and toys.

We have the same problem - dd, 11 and ds 9 share because dd2, 7 has severe disabilities. The two oldest do not always get on, but we have no other option atm.

Patience!

i have no personal space now at all anyway, and as you say it does not have to be forever. I would put the younger two in together but her room was made for her recently (we divided the big room at front of the house and created a very small third bedroom)and she loves her own space now. I am still not decided, i know it will happen cos dp really thinks it is a great idea and doesnt see any down side to it. Also we should be able to move to a bigger house in a few years, his wages are good, go up annually and our equity in this house will grow too (fingers crossed). I just wanted to see if anyone else has done this.

i grew up sharing a bedroom with one or other of my many siblings, always had some relative or other sleeping on the sofa and it never bothered me. Dp is only child grew up in huge house and no space issues.....I think its a shame the boys cant get on, the older two shared till recently and always got on fine, but we felt that dd needed her own space away from the crazy boys..

Could you divide up the boys room like you did with the third bedroom, just as a temporary measure ?
We're having a similar issue in the middle one has suddenly decided she's too cool for the little one any more which is a shame and causing trouble but we're making them sleep together and creating one room as a play room so they have space away if they need it.
No way would I give up my bedroom, it's bad enough sharing with a man, you need some time alone.

well we gave up the bedroom, but under protest on my part. I suggested oldest in the tiny room and dd and ds2 share and dp said no at the time and just went ahead and moved it all around. So ds1 now has a huge room to himself but he spends no time in there really and dp and i are without a room and on the sofa bed. I have told dp that this is ridiculous and he has come to my way of thinking so my plan of ds1 (who is the one who doesnt want to share with ds2) will have the small room and the other two will share. however we now need to figure out how to fit it all in and afford the new bed for the little room (its 5.4 ish by about 7ft ish) so does anyone know how we can get a bed small enough to fit the 5.4 bit cos there is no way it could go the other way. We are going to get a high bed and put a desk and practical storage under. Mamatomany, we divided the biggest bedroom to make a single and a double, we could realistically split the other room but one bit of it would not have a window which would be bit crap and i believe isnt allowed really. The other tricky bit will be to get the two beds in the other room, oh wot fun we have ahead of us. I am stuck for a bit as we cannot afford to get new bed for us let alone the other new beds we will need.....

Hmmm it is difficult and as you say you can't keep buying furniture and beds to accommodate.
I've currently got 2 huge bedrooms, 1 med and 1 small, who plans theses houses and why do they not think of the mothers trying organise referee the children/husbands.