Is two children ‘enough’

[cosimaxi]

We have 2 children, I’ve always seen us having a larger family with 3 children but I’m feeling like perhaps 2 is our number. We have a boy and a girl, I don’t particularly want to go through pregnancy and birth again, and from a financial perspective we’re better off with 2. My husband is keen to stay with 2. Am I going to regret not going for a third 10/20 years down the line?

You haven’t really detailed any reasons why you’d have more, just that you thought you would. You say you don’t want a pregnancy again so there’s your answer. You can’t have another child just in case you regret not doing so in 20 years

Why is this in large families?

‘Enough‘ is different for everyone and for many people two kids, one of each, is seen as the jackpot. You sound pretty happy with that and don’t mention any pull to have another. If you don’t feel the inclination now it’s unlikely to appear 10 years down the line, but I could be wrong!

yes

I would have loved a third and we started trying when my first two were 10 and 7 but it didn’t work out (MCs). However, with hindsight, where we are now is probably better - despite the fact that I would have adored the babies (twins) had they made it. My teens are great company, we can do adventurous things with them and have an element of ‘freedom’back as we can leave them at home without babysitters. Financially, it would have been tough too - or at least tough to give the younger ones what the older ones had - due to COL crisis, mortgage interest rates etc. These are my circumstances though. Life with 2 teens is pretty great but I’m sad that I didn’t get to live the ‘cute’ days again! TBH though, you have to face up to that at some point. My friend who has 4 is still trying desperately to eek out those times with her little one.

In most of mumsnet, 2 kids is normal, 3 is a large family

If you dont want more children and you find your at your limit then yes, 2 is enough.

2 isn’t necessarily enough but was what we could afford. 3 was never an option as we were both the middle one of three and the jump from 2 to 4 was far too expensive. Having 2 gave me the opportunity to return to study when they were both at school and build a satisfying career. There should be more to life than looking after babies.

Two is enough for me. If DH was at home more and did more parenting I’d have had more. But he isn’t and doesn’t. Two is as many as my mental health can accommodate

I have three, but at one point I wanted a fourth and DH said no. Now they're teens I'm relieved - three teens is more than enough! So I don't think you'll necessarily regret it if you stop now. I certainly don't regret not going for another one.

If you think 2 is enough then of course stop at 2. I’d love a third but my pregnancies are terrible, high risk and I’ve had a late miscarriage in the past. Plus we don’t have enough space so im reluctantly stopping at 2!

I don’t know how people afford more than two.