Baby number 5?

[Ginnymumof4]

Honest opinions from those that have five children please. is it much more difficult?
I love having four and found the early days challenging however not so much anymore. My youngest also had a cmpa which took 4 months to be diagnosed which kinda ruined the baby days for me constantly worrying about her and she didn’t sleep.

I can’t help feel not done and thinking about having another child. I already get comments when out and about on holiday and worry about my families reaction.
we are in the process of moving house and already have two seven seater cars.

please no comments about how I should just be happy, I am happy and a good mum. Me and my husband work hard to give them everything including 2/3 holidays abroad a year.

our children are 11, 9, 6 and 4.
Im also only 30 and husband 32

Honestly I'd ask yourself what will number 5 give you that the first 4 haven't? Also what happens if baby 5 is actually baby 5 and 6?

Twins are a possibility so you may get more than you bargain for😀

I've got 4dc and DH got a vasectomy after our youngest was born after I nearly lost my life. It was a very easy decision. When they are teenagers they need you more and honestly even if I did have the health to do it again I wouldn't. My eldest and youngest are autistic. Eldest 18yo and needs us for emotional support. It's a lot of work. Got a 15yo, 9yo and youngest 7yo.

Reassess when they're teens! It's easy of course when they're little but as they become teenagers it's a lot of work.

Having all the finances in the world won't prepare you for the teenage years...

It's a decision for you OP. Everyone's situation is slightly different so I don't think anyone can categorically say it's a good or a bad idea. It's a bit of a gamble and that's a fact for having any child ever.

I don't have five but I am one of five. I would not wish my upbringing to have been any different but there was no way I was ever having more than two myself.

You don't have teens yet that's true but I think the teen phase can be hell or a breeze (or anything in-between) but it's certainly less physically demanding and time consuming than babies/toddlers.

Yes, that's right, less physically demanding but more emotionally draining instead to compensate whilst raising teenagers...

Thanks,
Do any of you have 5 children?

I understand teens are expensive however I feel we are fine financially and if we had to cut down to one holiday an abroad a year we would do this. I work with children and families in children’s services so do have a good understanding of teenagers, their development (emotional) and expectations.

I think you need to think about your existing kids and whether having another would be the best thing for them. I am one of 4 and while I love my siblings, I’m glad my parents didn’t have more! It’s hard to give each individual child attention if you have so many…

I know someone who was one of five, she’s chosen to have two herself.

Have the baby if you feel it's the right time for your family. You are still young too. I am 39 and hope to have baby number 5 next year. I am one of 5 but we have big gaps, we are at different stages of life but we all love each other, it's great to have sibling support.

I have five. Been through the teenage years mostly too. I think five is a bit of a leap from four as you have a wider range of age needs, but it's been a positive for us and our children.

They all get on well and it's another relationship they all get a lot out of. Mine get on well though and there's never any guarantee of that among siblings.

What does five bring that four doesn't? Another unique person with their own talents and whatever they bring to the table as a person. Another person to have a relationship with (bearing in mind my comment there's no guarantee siblings will get on).

My mother had two, I chose to have five. Does your implication apply in reverse?

Kindly, I think you need therapy if you think you think your family isn't complete after 4 children. What is the void you're trying to fill? Research shows that after 4 children, any others don't thrive as much (have a look at Nathan Wallis for this), although this isn't really surprising. I don't believe anyone can properly care for 5 young children, they need your time. I'm hoping you or your partner is a SAHP and they will not be out at nursery asap.

I have 5 children. My eldest son is nearly 14 and my youngest is nearly 8 months.
Honestly its great and I wouldn't change it. I personally wouldn't have any more simply due to finances and the growing costs but nothing to do with handling five children.
My husband is very hands on and we don't argue over nappy changing or who's turn it is to do bath time (like some of my friends with less children) I do think it makes a difference having the just crack on attitude and get it done rather than worry about who is doing it. There is much less down time for me than my friends with less children (for example yesterday afternoon we had planned to watch a film and relax as we have had a full on few weeks..... we managed 14 minutes before someone needed something)
We are a tight unit and the kids do pick Hanging out together most of the time and we do get lots of complements over how tight knit we are and how well we all get along (we are by no means the Waltons)
Honestly the difference between 4-5 is minimal at best and I believe it's all to do with your attention and attitude as a parent. Let's not forget there are many children out there who have 0 siblings or are part of a pair who get far less attention than my children get

Just because you aren't capable to parenting 5 children effectively, doesn't mean others aren't. Mine got plenty of time. Definitely more time than someone with a child or two who put them in nursery. Mine were with me.

I wasn't trying to fill a void, I just loved motherhood, loved my children and each child and did it out of the joy of it.

I just don't understand how 5 children would get enough 1:1 time with each parent, but great if you can genuinely do that.

You make sure it happens. Not hard when you enjoy their company.

Mine were never in before or after school care or nursery, so likely got far more time than parents of one or two who were full time working parents.

Your eldest is 11 so another child and they will be what 13 by the time it takes to conceive and birth child 5?

Thats a massive gap and they will have zero common ground.

Child will be 5 when eldest is 18.

Youre only 30. So with an 11 yo you've been pregnant and having children since you were 18. Do you not want to raise your family and looking at getting something for yourself back.

Ditto.

We have 5 but the youngest is a lot younger than the others, so DC1 had left home before DC5 was born. It's been good for us but only you can make the decision for your family.

I’m one of 5 children and I chose to have only one child myself! My sister had two children and the remaining 3 males have no children.

thank you