Mother in laws comments

[Luc0101]

So long story short (I’ll try!) my mother in law is 80. And can make unhelpful comments to the family especially regarding weight. We went on a family holiday last year and I struggled with her a lot. She made comments my son was eating enough and since then I see her less. More to protect my peace recently. Anyway the last 18 months I’ve been on a weight loss journey and to re build my relationship with food and in particular binge eating. Before our holiday I lost 2 stone and since lost another stone. Healthy bmi after being overweight. A size 6/8 but I am very short. I feel like I have much more energy , feel confident in clothes and I am happier. Anyway I see my mother in law less so hadn’t seen her in a while. She came to the house today and saw me and said “have you lost weight” I replied yes. Anyway, she honestly looked at me in disgust scrunched her face and said you do not look okay, it does not look good on you”. This honestly took me aback so much, and I went silent and she just said you won’t loose more will you as it honestly doesn’t look good on you at all. I just walked off and sobbed and sobbed. Am I being unreasonable to say to my partner I’m pretty much done with her. Him and the children can see her but surely this is not okay? I’ve never ever been spoken to like that in my life ever. Or am i being sensitive to it? I can appreciate
somehere it was possibly from a caring point of way but said the wrong way? Thoughts please

I have no time for body weight comments (‘good’ or ‘bad’) about me or my children. I would shut them down immediately - why are you asking that? We don’t talk about weight in our family. Let’s change topic. What a rude thing to say… etc. I do it to my own mum all the time

I've struggled with my weight for years.

Any time I've been successful in losing weight, I've had certain people 'kindly' telling me not to lose any more weight or - IMO - trying to sabotage by trying to persuade me to break my diet.

Methinks that MIL is a bit jealous of you, OP. (Yes, I know that she's 80. That doesn't mean that she's not jealous.)

Thank you for your replies. It’s just nice to not feel as alone, and me to think I’m possibly not being OTT. Maybe when I’ve calmed down after a couple of days I should talk to her about it

Just be prepared for her doubling down, OP, particularly since she has form for making such comments.

Congratulations on reaching your goals and healthy BMI range. Without doubt you shouldn’t have been subjected to mother-in-law’s criticism however Mother-in-law sounds like she’s got some seriously weird issues of her own going on and I don’t think it’s worth wasting your energy or time trying to get her understanding and then being disappointed and upset with her likely stupid response. I would treat yourself to whatever your heart desires with new hair/nails/clothes and flaunt your happiness and body confidence with a big smile next time you see her! Plus, only agree to see her if DH is present and just walk away and let him deal with her stupidity next time she comments.