Hi guys I’m new to this but just looking for some advice and thoughts…..
I have 2 sons ones 19 and ones 3 both different fathers first born I had at 18 was with the father from 16 up until early 20s we were young and grew apart we get on though. Youngest son me and his dad were together 5 years met just before lock down and had baby in 2022, we’ve never had the perfect relationship I honestly think I just settled, I found that we always just bickered about anything and he would never take accountability for things and he was and is always right and likes to be in control. Anyways I’ve been seeing this guy for 7 months now he’s 6 years younger than me no kids he’s absolutely amazing but he wants a child. I’ve always said il never have 3 kids to 3 different men I draw the line at 2 but deep down I know I would love another kid but I think I’m worried on what people will think and how it will affect my youngest knowing his dads not around 24/7 but his younger sibling will have their mum and as round all the time, don’t worry too much about my eldest as he understands everything, then there’s my youngest dad we don’t see eye to eye and he’s sworn my new partner will never be in littles ones life ever and if I moved in with my new partner then he would seek full custody of my little one, also I’m turning 38 this year and I feel like am I too old to even be thinking about having another child? Feel like I have so many mixed emotions running through my head like I don’t know what to do for the best, sometimes I think would it be the easiest and safest option to get back with my youngest dad and have another baby to him so then my kids will have both mum and dad in the same household but then will they grow up in a house full of resentment and constant bickering? Feel like I can’t talk to my friends because they don’t like my ex and they think I’m stupid if I have another kid to someone else. Xx