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Three

5 replies

losingpatiencetoday · 11/01/2025 10:02

I'm 36, and have two children already, one of each sex. Eldest goes to school this year, youngest turns three this year but isn't at school until 2027. We have a seven seater car, a house big enough for each child to have their own room and have the finances. On paper, there's no reason logistically or financially that we couldn't afford a third child.

I've been thinking about a third for around six months. Perhaps it's my age. It took me a year to conceive both of my children each time and almost a year to conceive a baby I miscarried, so I don't think I mentally have it me to do all the opks everything that goes with it. It'd have to be a not trying but not preventing kind of situation. DH and I have no fertility issues, just pure coincidence that our journeys took a bit of time and probably couples with all the pressure I put on myself.

Six months ago, I was absolutely adamant that I didn't want a third but my children seem to have got to an easier age in terms of playing together and knowing that I'll have one at school in September has factored into my change of mindset. I don't want to broach it with dh yet because I think he'd think I was mad! I'd rather wait to see if the feeling passed but I'm also acutely aware that time is not on my side either, due to my age.

For those of you in similar situations, did you stop at two or go for it?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
dabdab · 11/01/2025 10:16

Went for it and have never regretted! 7 year gap between eldest and youngest, but somehow just didn't feel 'done' yet after my 2nd, and had my third just before my 38th birthday. Not always easy, but feel very lucky to have 3 children.

Whoyoutakingto · 11/01/2025 10:26

13 years between my oldest and my youngest. Now 33, 31, 22 and 21. No regrets love having a large family, we are all close and supportive of each other. I was one of 6 though and my oldest siblings 15 years older than me and we are also very close 🙂

Trainstationing · 11/01/2025 10:29

Went for it! Can’t let you know whether I’d recommend it yet as am 30 weeks pregnant with my third. Others are approaching 2 and 4.

losingpatiencetoday · 11/01/2025 11:58

I'm one of four so from a larger family too. DH is an only child so took a bit of convincing to even have a second.

Does anyone have GBG? I never had a preference for either sex but I wondered whether life is easier with GBB and I still have lots of boy clothing from my DS as he's the youngest so that would naturally feel easier I think.

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N8B · 19/02/2025 19:06

I am of the school of thought that it is nice to break things up - we have BGB. The two older ones compete and fight obvs, but it is nowhere near the same-sex close-in-age sibling rivalry. But I am sure you will make it work regardless and would not even fathom having it another way.

Also, DD wore loads of DS1 clothes as a baby. For some reason I get less cognitive dissonance when a girls wears a dino and truck pattern then when a boy wears fairies and frills. 😂

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