Pregnant and don't know what to do

[Lay2023]

I am currently 8 weeks pregnant with my 3rd baby. I have two beautiful children from a previous marriage. My marriage came to a sudden end 5 months ago. It was a long time coming, very toxic and I'd wanted out for years. I unexpectedly met someone new. He's gorgeous, everything I could've ever dreamed of. Great with my kids, looks after me and is just wonderful inside and out. I found out I was pregnant and it was something we'd planned. For the first couple of weeks I was excited. Then panic set in, and when I told my parents their reaction was awful. They made me feel like I needed to get rid of it. Fast forward to last Friday, I decided that I was just going to have to get rid of the baby and please them. My partner didn't want me to but was supportive of whatever decision I've made. The medication came in the post on Saturday and I've not slept since. I had a termination at 19 and it screwed me up for years. I feel like all this pressure has made me decided this and now I'm not so sure. People keep saying everyone will judge, it will be really hard to have 3 and that I'm stupid if I keep it. I just don't know what to do. I've come on here looking for advice, reassurance and to see I'm not a total idiot for wanting to keep the baby. I've always wanted lots of kids, and I feel like everything does happen for a reason. Thank you x

Keep the baby. It sounds like you want to and it will be loved.

Keep the baby! Ignore everyone else x

If you want the baby, then you keep it, but to be truthful, there is a lot to unpack here.

Your marriage ended just 5 months ago, you've already started dating someone, and you actually wanted to get pregnant? Really, op? What on earth is the rush? You don't even know this man. Do you really think thrusting a stranger and a new baby into your children's lives is the best choice you could make?

I had 3 all neurodivergent, my youngest was unplanned and born when my marriage was in injury time.
She is a gift from whichever higher power is out there.
It was hard at first 3 children as a single mum but I never regretted having her. She is a ray of sunshine and the world is a better place with her in it.
Only you can decide what to do , but I promise you, people who want to "judge" will always find something to do so.

The timing is not ideal but I wouldn't have an abortion to please your parents.
The place you got the abortion medication from, do they provide any counseling?

Thank you everyone, your messages are really kind. I've just realised my thing said we had planned and I meant to say it wasn't something we had planned. It was a huge shock as I was on the pill. All your messages are really lovely. Thank you x

Forget what other people say. Do what you want.

If you want the baby, keep the baby.

Screw everyone else.

Terminating to please other people is a sure fire way to ensure you feel guilt and regret for a long time. Don't do it to yourself.

Your body. Your baby. Your life. Your decision.

Speaking from experience I had this exact same situation first baby fell pregnant after splitting up with partner and they thought I couldn't do it alone from only being 19. I was ready to abort to make everyone else happy but my grandma me not too then I found out she had cancer and my grandad always said when someone dies and someone is born it means when one door closes another opens. That's when I agreed to keep my daughter and I never regretted it we have the best bond and I'm glad I thought about it.

Your reasons for a termination are passive aggressive. Read your post back to yourself. Its not healthy. What do you want?

Keep the baby, it will all work out x

I don’t understand how it is coming across as passive aggressive ?

If your new partner is supportive and you want the baby then don’t abort because your parents say so. If you are going to keep or abort it has to be for you. The fact that you had a previous termination that has impacted you and your parents presumably know and are still pushing is terrible. I understand that they are panicked and I guess it comes from hopefully some kind place of worry but still. Maybe look into counselling about the subject if you can.