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Honest opinions re: 4 kids
2

Sweetwrapper · 12/12/2020 23:37

I have 3 kids already, 8,5 and 3. Was not planning on any more but am unexpectedly pg. did not want to go ahead with pg, but could not go through with termination. Counsellor said it was a lifestyle choice in my situation, which made me feel terrible. I had some medical issues previously, especially in last pg, but they are probably manageable if managed. I have also just started a new job, so timing is terrible. But trying to really think what life with 4 will be like, financially and practically. Am worried current kids will miss out in so many ways - money, opportunities, time. Thanks

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Crazymummyto4 · 15/12/2020 09:22

I'm maybe not the best person to comment as our youngest is only 13 weeks so I can't comment on finances, holidays etc yet but so far we've all loved it! He's slotted in perfectly, the older three all dote over him and try their best to help out and try to include him as much as they can already. There isn't any jealousy, in some ways it's easier as they always have someone to play with so if I'm doing something with one of them, the others will always have each other. He was a planned baby but I still had the worries of whether we'd done the right thing when I was pregnant, but it feels like he's always been here already and we couldn't imagine life without him now.

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Nuttytart534 · 21/12/2020 22:53

I am currently in a similar situation - I have 3 kids and an unexpected pregnancy also couldn't imagine having a termination so had to follow through! My kids are slightly older 17,12 and 4. I'm now 6m preg and it's taken me till now to actually accept that it's happening.

I have been terrified of having this new baby - I also have health issues that can be managed but I was already struggling with my 4 Yr old 🤦🏼‍♀️so how ill cope with another god only knows.

I worry about the others being pushed out or me not having time or health to give them what they need but have recently undertaken counselling which has made me realise that these are all perfectly normal feelings and makes you a good mum!

You eldest may only be 8 but I bet they will love to help with their new sibling. Mum guilt is the worst!

As for financially - I've always believed it doesn't matter how much money you have there is never a good time to have a child! As long as you have a roof over your head, food on the table and love in your heart nothing else matters! (as I said I have health issues which means I only manage PT work, my partner has been on sick for last 6 weeks, with 3 kids and preg - financially thjngs suck for us right now too) but it doesn't stop me crying for hours because I have no money left at the end of the month to splurge on crap lol!

Try not to be so hard on yourself.

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