Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Larger families

Find out all about large family cars, holidays and more right here.

Flip

Original poster

Help with age gap (8,6,1) toddler ruins their games, what can they do together??

15 replies

Hannah2199 · 05/09/2020 14:19

My kids are 8, 6 and 1 and I'm finding it so hard! The toddler takes up most of my time and I struggle to find anything they can play together.

8 and 6 year old will play alone, or together for a while but obviously not happy to do this all day. 1 year old will ruin their lego, board games, book reading etc, trying to get them to do homework is a nightmare- toddler clinging on to me crying.

I've tried to set up things for toddler to do in high chair while we play games or do crafts but she plays with crayons or bricks for 5 mins and then gets bored and cries.

Recently toddler (17 months) has stopped taking naps so there is no respite at all. Previously the older kids could put up with it knowing that she would sleep for 2 hours in the afternoon and I'd give them all my attention.

Now lockdown is easing I thought it would be easier but turns out local trampoline parks and softplay either cater for under 4s or over 4s in the session so cant take all 3 kids at the same time. Toddler will no longer stay in buggy for something like mini golf for example. So largely we are staying in the house all day.

OH does help where he can, but works long hours and we have noone else to help. I'm dreading being stuck in the house this winter, help!! What can I do??

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Debradoyourecall · 05/09/2020 18:34

Are the older two back at school now so that you can do things alone with the toddler?

Debradoyourecall · 05/09/2020 18:36

I saw a photo taken by another mum with the same problem and she had built a raised up Lego table so that her eldest could play Lego without the toddler being able to reach.

jammydodgersplease · 05/09/2020 18:42

Wrestling
We have 9, 7 and just 3 and this is their favourite thing to do together.....

user24 · 05/09/2020 18:48

I have a 4 and 1 year old and am having a similar problem. It's so difficult! Everything ends up in 1 year olds mouth, or anything 4 year old makes gets destroyed. Thank god for school on Monday!

eddiemairswife · 05/09/2020 18:52

Can't the older ones play on the table? My older ones used to. And you can't expect them all to play together with that age gap at the moment.

minipie · 05/09/2020 18:55

Does OH work weekends? If not then suggest you split up for several chunks of time at the weekends, one of you do something with the older two while one takes care of the toddler.

After school, I would prioritise getting homework done, how much do they have? About 30/45 min? Will toddler watch tablet for that long?

Itsrainingnotmen · 05/09/2020 18:58

This is why I had a 4th close to the third!!

Babyfg · 05/09/2020 19:23

Give the younger kid a tablet with videos on for a bit? I know it's not great but a half an hour here or there won't hurt. Also do as many activities as you can at the dining room table so the toddler can't reach. You could also stagger things like lunch. Feed the older ones first then while the younger one is distracted with food do an activity at the table. Or vice verse.

TooMinty · 05/09/2020 20:49

17 months seems really young to give up naps, can you find a way to reinstate them? Otherwise put toddler to bed early (will be needed with no nap) and then quality time with older two in evening?

Boringnamechanging · 05/09/2020 20:56

What time is toddler going to bed? When mine tried to drop his nap before he was 2 I was pregnant so wanted to nap too I started to wear him out in the morning with walking/park/tunnel in living room. And put him to bed later and that meant he had the nap again.

Original poster

Hannah2199 · 06/09/2020 09:33

Thanks everyone. We do try to do things at the table with the older kids but it's not long before the toddler wants to be sitting on my knee, reaching for lego or whatever. Sometimes she will sit for a short time with a snack but often it ends up on the floor.

Now the schools are back I try to do something in the morning like park, then nap after lunch but I find it can take up to 45-60 mins to get her to sleep and I then have to disturb her to do the school run.

We usually have some activities/classes for the older ones on the weekend but to be honest after spending all week on the floor playing with peppa pig I'm slightly demented by this point. I hope it's going to get easier??!!

OP posts:

TigerQuoll · 09/09/2020 07:30

Could you put the toddler in childcare one or two afternoons a week?

yikesanotherbooboo · 09/09/2020 07:53

I would play with toddler or take him to park,dog walk,shops for some of the time,at others he would watch a cartoon or The Wiggles but I expected the older DC to be inclusive during playtime as well. This is straightforward in the garden and I agree that wrestling came into it but also playing with sylvanians, dressing up, playing with the animals etc. I had a day nanny while I was at work who would concentrate on the little one so they felt attended to !

Marylou62 · 29/09/2020 07:57

I have no advice that hasn't already been given up thread but just wanted to let you know that "this too shall pass " as my DM used to say.. It's hard tho.. I remember it clearly.. Just got to add my funny story.. My children are adults now but I used to have a playpen.. OK in those days! I would often find the older two in there playing to stop baby brother ruining their game...

AgileAsAGoat · 15/10/2020 15:04

I got a playpen!
(Couple of years ago)
For the big ones to go in and keep their toys out of toddler reach! 😂

Flip