Is having 3 easier than going from 1 to 2?

[coffeeandjuice]

I have a 2 and a 1 year old. Going form 1 to 2 wasn't twice as hard, it was ten times harder! I'm just getting my life back (I.e sleep/ me time).

And I'm pregnant again... I don't know how I feel about it. Is this going to be more difficult than I can ever imagine?

Nothing’s ever as hard as 0 to 1!

Honestly, it took me a little bit longer after every baby to feel like me again. Probably 8 months, then a year and two years after DC3z. I just get sucked into the undertow for a bit. They’re 10, 14 & 16 now - wouldn’t change anything.

I have 3 close together. They are now nearly 4, nearly 3 and 1 and I'm pregnant with a very big surprise number 4. In my opinion, the more you have, the easier it becomes as you know exactly what to expect. I also find they just slot into preexisting routines. Don't get me wrong, there are days that I want to tear my hair out but I really didn't find going from 2 to 3 difficult.

Yeah, by number three I was breastfeeding while vacuuming 😬 seriously though when it was easier with number three by far bed times, toilet training everything I had down pat. Now they are older it's a bit more tricky always two of the three seem to fighting or one out of three acting up can be exhausting. But I hope when they are older they have each other and get on better. I was brought up in a three and we are all very close despite younger agruments

It will be hard while they’re young but it will get easier.
Just try to get a routine going. I found it helpful to try to structure each day but be relaxed enough to not stress if it doesn’t work out sometimes.

Yes! Three is a package and is soon into a routine as you have no other choice definitely recommend good luck!

Congratulations on your pregnancy. Personally, I found going from 1 to 2 the hardest - much harder than going from 0 to 1 or from 2 to 3. Having to sometimes 'choose' which child to attend to in a given moment was difficult - I felt that I was neglecting both of them! By the time number 3 came along I was used to it and had learnt to juggle things

Nothing for me will ever be as hard as going from none to one. Number two was a good shock because it was so easy in comparison and Number three just slotted right in. Mine are 5,3 and 1.

I found going from 1-2 harder than 2-3. Mine are two close together then a bigger gap to no. 3 (5 years from 1-3). However now they are older I do find that one is left out or they fight all the time!! But maybe it’s the personalities (And lockdown). I can never get three kids to do the same thing at the same time!!! But it’s much harder at the moment.. Usually a lot easier. No 3 completed our family and added a little extra manageable craziness to life!

0-1 was definitely the hardest, second hardest 2-3!

Following as I’m in the same situation. I found 1-2 way harder than 0-1 but hoping that this time will be easier. I guess time will tell!

2-3 has been a tough transition for us. No 3 is 7 weeks and still trying to get into some kind of routine. Lockdown probably not helping to be honest

By No.3 I was an expert. It was a breeze. Though I also found going from 1 to 2 pretty easy.
The reason is probably because I'd never been around any babies until I had my first and we were absolutely clueless. It didn't help that the baby was not cooperative one bit. She screamed non-stop whenever we put her down, right up until about 6 months. Once you've been through something like that.....,,

Thanks for the feedback, it's really helpful. It's it possible to go back to work in any form with three young ones?? I am currently having a year out while the cost of childcare for two children outweighs wage. But I can't imagine juggling work and three.

I was a SAHM for about 8 years from ds1’s birth to when ds3 was 2. I worked 6 hours a week rising over time to 28 now. The sort of work I do would not have covered childcare for two never mind three. This is a very personal thing though and only you will know if your family finances can support childcare for three at a loss for a period of time, or whether your path will be seriously disrupted by a longer break.

@coffeeandjuice Once upon a time, I was a teacher but I took a career break when number 2 arrived as the cost of childcare and commuting didn't make working viable. When number 3 was born, teaching became just a far aware dream! To make ends meet, I know work 20 hours in a supermarket in the evenings/weekends so yes, work can be possible! I actually enjoy it, not for the job itself, but to gave some grownup chit chat!

Yes @thing5, I'm a teacher too and just can't imagine It's a job that is highly compatible with three young children!

@coffeeandjuice To be honest, if someone said to me they'd pay for all my childcare fees, I'd be back to teaching in a flash! And I'm pregnant with number 4. Unfortunately, the magic fairy and that lottery win aren't going so well at the moment 😆 so evening supermarket work it is!

0-1 is the hardest.

But yes it does step up when you go to 3, because you move from man-to-man marking to general area control.

I stayed working btw, even though the family exchequer barely rose after the bills. But it was worth it for a bit of time to,think about something else, and to ensure the family's financial eggs weren't all in the same basket. And unless your DC are very close together, the bills will have started coming down with funded hours and school (thoughbafter school,admin can become a whole new admin challenge)

You do need to be very, very organised. And be aware that it doesn't get easier once they're all at school,- cheaper possibly, but when they start wanting/needing things like Brownies and swimming lessons, and to see friends after school it's quite a management role. I think you do need one parent on top of it all (couid be the DDad, it's not inherently a mum role) because if you try to share this one things will get overlooked. No matter how diligent you each think you are at sticking stuff on the family calendar

I found 1-2 a sharp adjustment. 20 months in between them meant I was dealing with a (what I now know to have been) a jealous and bewildered toddler. That stage lasted for a small bit intense time, about 8 weeks.

Never happened with #3 who appeared 20 months after #2. Both DC dote on her and have since day 1. She truly has just slotted in and is a big fan of her brother and sister as much as they love her.

For me

0-1: shock of the new
1-2: stress and guilt
2-3: doddle

I found it easier, DH found it harder. With 3, someone is always talking! This can be a good or a bad thing depending on your personality!

For me, 2-3 was the hardest (sorry OP) because DC3 was not an easy baby - he was by far the worst sleeper of the three, and then a very wilful and determined toddler! He's lovely now though!

I was a SAHM when they were little and went back to work when DC3 started reception.

I found 1-2 the hardest, 2-3 was easy by then.

DH and I also both work full time, I had 12 months ML with each one, then back to it and full time nursery.

It's fun (mostly)

I have always said that going from 1 to 2 was by FAR the hardest especially if there is a close gap and they are so dependent on you. The way I see it is that with 2 you already have chaos. All adding children does is extend the length of time you will live in chaos rather than add to it. None of mine were particularly easy so I guess opinions may vary due to the characteristics of their individual children

2 to 3 a doddle parenting wise, but found conversations with other people, getting in the car, shopping etc was a big game changer!!