Factors influencing a third child
Goostacean · 16/04/2020 14:00
Just musing really, but would like a third in a couple of years. This morning I realised, rather morbidly, what a huge challenge it would be for me or DH to bring up 3 as a lone parent if something happened to one of us. Or even to be the RP if we split up. Or the challenge of a third with SEN.
Did anyone think about this sort of stuff before having more than two? I feel like I could raise my two boys singlehandedly if I had to, but 3+ would be another level...
OneKeyAtATime · 16/04/2020 14:03
I think you should ask yourself that with any child you will have, whether it be the first, second, third, etc one.
locomoco19 · 16/04/2020 14:11
3 is better than 2 😆
My third was completely unexpected not planned, was panicking so much!! How on earth will I cope with another child? But you know what, my third is the best thing that happened to our family. It's so lovely seeing my two other children with the baby, they honestly adore baby.
It's not much harder than 2 when you have the third. I think it's harder if they all are very young, both mine are at full time school, so it really gave me the chance to give full attention to baby as well as still have my me time.
If you think you can single handedly cope with 2, then trust me you can cope with 3. Go for it otherwise it may be something you will later on regret.
Goostacean · 17/04/2020 19:30
Oh yes, obviously you should always bear these things in mind... but I felt confident of my answers with one and even with two now that he’s here! Three seems like a step up. I’ve only got two hands...!
csla · 18/04/2020 09:18
For me 1-2 was the biggest jump as by then you’re good at juggling. Number 3 has fitted in really easily although I think the age gap is a big factor (my other two are both in full time school). The pros outweigh any practicality- related cons at the moment
Himawarigirl · 23/04/2020 15:53
Another one with two (normally) in school and a baby and it’s working for us. Once you are in the swing with three you’ll feel as able to cope in adversity as you do now. And Re the big questions, we talked round them loads, all of which was really a process of gathering up our courage to set those worries aside and go for it. And we are all, kids included, so glad we did.
ToothlessAndHiccup · 23/04/2020 16:02
3 was a step up (unplanned) but I am so happy no. 3 came along. Initially the extra cost was minimal but now No. 3 is a bit older it's getting greater.
Little things, an ice cream say, x 3 rather than 2. Extra curricular activities x 3. Food!
We can manage thankfully but it should be a consideration (which is why we were going to stick with 2).
Goostacean · 23/04/2020 22:13
Our second was a surprise (shouldn’t have been, actions have consequences...!) but I’m so happy we’ve got him. Three feels like more of a handful, but I’m glad you’ve had positive experiences! Luckily the financial side of things isn’t a big worry, but obviously shouldn’t be taken for granted.
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