Third child?

[badg3r]

Not sure if three counts as a large family! But interested to hear opinions on having three vs two kids as we are currently wondering whether to try for a third. Financially three work be fine and not worries about holidays, bigger cars, etc, but I'm specifically looking for opinions on family dynamics and relationships between siblings. I am one of three and loved it, although I know of others who have not!

So hit me with it, pros and cons...!

I am one of three.

Although I felt left out a bit (am female, have two younger brothers), now we are older we are very close and I love having two siblings. I'd have liked even more!

I'm currently pregnant with #3 too.

We went from one to three in 17 months as we had twins. Our house is never quiet and I am shattered. When I only have two at home it is so much quieter and far far easier. However, I think a lot depends on the personalities of your children.

I have 3. They are all boys (which I wanted, no gender disappointment here contrary to loads of threads recently). We knew as soon as we had our second that we weren’t done, we both felt really strongly that our family wasn’t complete so we had number 3. I remember saying when I was preg with him that I was so happy he was another boy as he’d “slot right in” and we were already “super experienced boy parents.” What massive smug wankers we really were! Our third boy is such hard work! He’s now 6 going on 16 and thinks he rules the house. He’s very very funny and super cute but “slot in” he has not . We don’t regret it for a moment and in fact we were saying today that if we were a few years younger we’d probably go for number 4.

Our life is crazy busy and very loud. Someone I know (with 4) said that this number of children is critical mass and that 4 is easier. That said, she has 4 very calm, quiet children while I have 3 high energy spirited boys who are bloody ace.

The only thing I’d say is that if you end up having 3 of the same gender be prepared for the well meaning head tilts and queries about if you’re going to “try” for the other. I get asked this at least twice a week. I now ask people if there’s a different way of doing sex to get preg with a girl. That usually shuts the rude fuckers up .

We have three DC aged 6, 9 and 12. Only the middle one was planned! The two younger ones get on really well, but the older one is less tolerant and likes their own space. We have days when they all get on well, and others that resemble Armageddon. Eating out and at home can be tricky when all three want to sit by mommy! Having said that, having a third didn't really make that much difference, and as parents we were more easy going. One massive plus point is that you get three times the cuddles, pictures, smiles and being told "I love you mommy". If the financial and practical side of things are not a problem - I wouldn't hesitate in having №3.

That is reassuring!! Interesting to hear too that three is the critical number - I can imagine how if there are four siblings there is more of a tendency to break into pairs and fewer arguments that one is left out.

We have three and I love it. They are boy aged nearly 7, girl aged 4.5 and girl aged nearly 1 so a 6 year spread. I am one of two and DH is one of four so three feels like a happy medium for us. Honestly two kids felt too ‘binary’ for me, I know that sounds crazy but there was no complexity in the dynamic - just one sibling relationship - which will suit some folks perfectly but not me, I love the different combinations. I think it’s true that you have to be more laid-back with three and interestingly I now get a lot of comments that my older two are grown-up for their age. They have had to be really, there is a lot less attention on each now and therefore less mollycoddling and worrying about each. Genuinely I do notice that my friends with two are often less laid-back and more like helicopter parents but that could just be my friends! What I mean to say is that they make as much work for themselves with two as I do with three - you always have your hands full with any number of kids, it’s just the nature of the dynamic that alters, not really the workload as such.
I’m going to stop extolling the virtues of three now before I start talking myself into four! Good luck though and don’t be afraid if you’re both on board with the idea of three - it’s a great adventure!

It’s hard work but when I look at the joy and support my three get from each other it’s incomparable to two. If two of them are arguing one can be the peace maker, if one is tired there’s another one to play with. There’s less pressure on all of them in so many ways. They have loads of friends but when were just the family they’ve always got playmates. They learn an awful lot of social skills by sharing and negotiating and caring. Family life is never ever dull and we have a lot of fun. (& drama and arguments and noise!).

I was one of two and looking back although we got on well it was more intense & boring. I’d say go for it!

Hi all. I’m new here and the only reason I have decided to join after reading the posts for years is because I am in a real conundrum (or so I feel it is).

I have two children, girl 10, boy 9. Now I’ve read many times that I will regret not having more children when I’m much older (I am 33 in November).

We have enough space for a third child (four bedroom semi). We are financially very stable on husband’s salary alone. No issues there at all.

I am a house wife and have never worked as never needed to. I’ve tried working (nursery nurse) but realised it’s just not for me.
I get bored at home. Just shop and waste time really.
Should I have a third child?
I don’t get broody upon seeing little babies/toddlers and I do not feel like I want a child.
My husband however does want a child but has left it completely up to me (I have horrible morning sickness for five months).

I just do not feel like a baby. My children are more interested in a pet than a baby to be honest. I’ve asked them.
However I know I won’t mind having a baby. I won’t be upset or regretful.
But Will I regret it not having a child when I’m older?