Hi ladies:-)
I have 2 amazing sons, aged 9 and 6. I have an absolutely wonderful husband who would do anything for me. I have recently returned to work(9 months ago) after spending many years basically being home with the boys. I absolutely love my job and having some independence again. Life is pretty much perfect. We go on holiday easily, are financially secure and the boys are old enough for us to have an au pair look after them when I'm at work. Life is good.
So why, after all these years of being sure that I only wanted two, do I now pine for another? Now, I can't imagine only having two. My family seems too neat, too small and I wonder if I'm thinking about things all the wrong way. We thought that when my youngest turns 18, I'll be 45.....still extremely young to go and travel etc. But what if at that stage I feel really lonely and regret not having more? And of course, then it's too late?
My husband is perfectly happy to have a third....he can see my reasoning about feeling empty when both boys are grown up.
There is no doubt that I want another child...that is definite. I am just terrified of the consequences of the first few years. How will my boys cope, how will my career be affected, what will it do to us as a family. I got rid of every single baby item....so it will be like starting with my first again.
Am I mad to consider this or should I stick to the easy option of the two I have already and make my peace with the situation?
I just don't want to regret anything when it's too late.
Thanks for reading