My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Find out all about large family cars, holidays and more right here.

Larger families

why did you have three children?

47 replies

Theknittinggorilla · 01/07/2016 08:29

We are ttc number 3 after much talk of whether it is a good idea or not. I've been very keen for a third, my dh less so. In the end we have made the decision to try as my desire for another is much stronger than his desire not to.

His reasons for sticking at two are very sensible - easier life (cars holidays etc), cheaper, life has got easier (youngest is 16 months) so a reluctance to go back to sleepless nights etc, not being outnumbered!

My reasons for a third are pretty much just that I really really want one and I struggle to give any more tangible reason than that!

So I'm interested in what were your reasons for going for the third child?

OP posts:
Report
Tsotofamily · 08/07/2016 12:54

I've always wanted a larger family, I'm now due dc4 in 2 weeks. Would love more but realistically I think this will be my last Sad

Report
SirChenjin · 08/07/2016 12:58

Because we had a mad moment on holiday and - whoops! It's been hard work and has set us back financially at a time when our friends are are all waving their older ones off to uni as we are with our elder 2 - but I wouldn't change it for the world.

Report
SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 08/07/2016 13:02

We stuck at 2 DCs for 9 years and were very happy with that. Then I got pregnant unexpectedly. At first we were shocked (I had been told I wouldn't conceive again naturally), upset (me mainly) & generally not very happy about it. After much soul searching we decided to continue with the pregnancy - only to be told at my 12 week scan that the baby had died at about 8 weeks.

Given the feelings we had when I discovered I was pregnant, we should have felt relieved shouldn't we? We didn't. We were devastated & realised we really did want a 3rd DC.

15 months later DD arrived. Her brothers were 14 & 10.

Report
claraschu · 08/07/2016 13:07

It is good to be outnumbered.

Gets rid of the idea that things are somehow supposed to be smooth and un-chaotic.

I love having 3, just always feel very guilty about the population explosion

Report
Theknittinggorilla · 08/07/2016 16:13

Claraschu that pretty much sums up what I think - I may regret it but kind of like the idea of the chaos!

OP posts:
Report
weebarra · 08/07/2016 16:17

Um, my pill failed.
We probably would have had a third anyway though. DD is great though and her birth probably saved my life as I was diagnosed with breast cancer when she was 8 weeks old.

Report
monkeyfacegrace · 08/07/2016 16:24

I have one 9 year old with exH, then a 7 year old with DH. I always didn't feel quite complete as EOW I'd lose my eldest and feel like a one child family if that makes sense? So the 3rd is really only 2.5. That's the argument I used to DH anyway Grin

She's now 15 months so a large age gap, and occasionally frequently I regret it hugely and remember how easy we had it before. To be honest it was a massive mistake. But, I ADORE this baby. She is the easiest, cutest, happiest little thing ever and I wouldn't be without her.

Report
GinAndPhonics82 · 08/07/2016 16:24

By accident Confused

Report
GrouchyKiwi · 08/07/2016 16:36

I wanted a large family, DH wanted no more than four so we agreed on that. We've stopped at three because this pregnancy was hard and I couldn't look after my two properly as I couldn't leave the house or play with them or do the cleaning. I am sad we won't get to have four, but my three are beautiful. It's bloody hard work (DC3 is 6 weeks) but the other two adore their baby sister and it's wonderful seeing them all together.

Report
onecurrantbun1 · 15/07/2016 22:14

Just really really wanted more than two. It felt like the middle seat in the car / extra bedroom were empty, waiting for someone to use them.

Although, now considering whether we'd go for DC4.

Report
suit2845321oie · 15/07/2016 22:24

Because DH wanted 3 and I couldn't really think of a reason not to. It was incredibly hard work as she was the hardest toddler ever but she's 7 now and the most delicious thing ever, I adore her, we all do. Never had the urge for a 4th, once she came along we were done, there wasn't even a discussion

Report
DramaAlpaca · 15/07/2016 22:29

I felt that my family wasn't complete with just two. DH needed a little bit of persuading, but he was happy to agree as he knew how much I wanted another baby. DC3 completed our family perfectly, there was never any thought of a fourth.

Report
RealLove · 16/07/2016 21:35

Two never quite felt enough for us. I had DD3 3 weeks ago and am now considering whether to go for DC4, obviously not any time soon though!

Report
bingisthebest · 16/07/2016 21:42

Live life with passion. You have just made me smile. What lovely positive thoughts.
Of all the things my number 3 is amazing. We all love her and it's completely worth it.

Report
GinnyMcginface · 16/07/2016 21:47

We had this very same conversation when we had two children and decided to have another. The next 'child' was twins which an option to bear in mind. Although we actually had another after that so I am clearly no good for advice!

Report
TheEagle · 16/07/2016 21:50

DC2 turned out to be DC2 and DC3.

I had 3 under 20 months.

Now I have 3 under 3. I'm permanently exhausted Grin

Report
PrincessPotsie · 16/07/2016 21:52

My DH wanted 3 and I was persuaded. As much as I love my 3rd DC I would never advise couples to have 3DC. It's really tough with 3.

Report
ThroughThickAndThin01 · 16/07/2016 22:00

I was one of four. Wanted four.

Dh was one of two. Wanted two.

3 was the compromise.

I was gutted ds3 wasn't DS 3 & ds4/dd

Report
Topseyt · 16/07/2016 22:08

I just didn't feel "finished" with two, and we managed to have DD3, who is now 14.

I am so glad we had three, although it has been hard financially as it meant that I could not work again for some years (salary more than wiped out by childcare costs).

Report
Theknittinggorilla · 17/07/2016 22:14

Ah thanks everyone for honest responses. Still very set on three!

OP posts:
Report
YourNewspaperIsShit · 19/07/2016 19:51

ThroughThick I have 2 DC one is 3 the other 5months and I think I'll also be gutted if DC3 doesn't secretly come with DC4! I must be bonkers but have a strong desire for multiples Blush

Report
ThroughThickAndThin01 · 19/07/2016 20:08

Good luck YourNewspaper, it has happened to a couple of friends

Report

Don’t want to miss threads like this?

Weekly

Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!

Log in to update your newsletter preferences.

You've subscribed!

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.