Thinking of 5th child....what are your age gaps

[MamiSandra243]

Hi, We have 4 children aged 13, 10, 10 & 8 and now thinking of having another one. I am 40 and hubby is 42. Our twins were natural and fraternal, so we are at higher chance of more twins, which we would love.

Just wanted to ask if anyone out there was mad enough to have more after four and what your age gaps meant for the youngest. We fear a single baby now will feel like an only child because the next child would be almost 9 years older.

Thanks.

Sandra

Hi Sandra,

My children are a similar age to yours (12, 11, 8 and 7 years) and we've gone beyond the thinking stage and I'm now almost 10 weeks pregnant with DC 5. This was after much deliberation on our part and an early miscarriage shortly after my 40 th birthday.

My youngest will be 8 years when this one arrives and I agree that it will be like having an only child, however, as I am 42 now I'm much more concerned about the risks to both the baby and myself and the risk of genetic abnormalities.

I know that when it arrives, the children will be so excited and it will almost have 6 sets of parents so this isn't something that concerns me too much.

I know what you mean. Even though we are still at the thinking stage, I already know I will be so much less relaxed this time round because of my age. Part of us thinks that we maybe could have tried a year or two sooner, but then again the others were younger then and one of the reasons why we feel we can cope is because the others are older. Are you have all the screening tests done?

There are days I think a number 5 would be great! We have 4 now.. 12,7,4,2. I confess I'm out off by my obstetric history with increasingly difficult deliveries.
Last dc was full term. 3rd caesar. Post partum haemorrhage. Wound necrosis. So not a good plan to go again!
We also have dc2 who has an abnormally developed brain. He has global delays and hydrocephalus. As well as a big cyst in his brain.

So I would be a bit fearful to have another special needs child, say downs etc at this stage. I'm 39.

So I will focus on loving watching my kids grow up. Regaining my freedom and planning onwards

Thanks for your replies. I am really not sure about trying for fifth. With the elevated chance of Down's and twins, I may be opening a massive can of worms here. We have been blessed with four lovely children. Maybe I should count my blessings and stop here.

i have 5 ds' s , dd16, 3 ds' s 12, 10 and 6 and 10wk old dd.
baby has slotted in very nicely :-) the 3 boys adore her, dd 16 hates her.

my children are 19, 17, 15, 10 & 8 then I'm also due any day. The largest gap was 5 years and wasn't to bad this time its nearly 9 years so not sure yet what to expect but the youngest is handling it a lot better than I expected. But I suppose in a way it will be more like an only child but with a lot of family around as opposed to similar aged siblings

i have 5 ds' s , dd16, 3 ds' s 12, 10 and 6 and 10wk old dd.
baby has slotted in very nicely :-) the 3 boys adore her, dd 16 hates her.

Congratulations. I couldn't not respond. Why do you think dd hates baby? i have 13 year old who finds her toddler brother a rea pita 95% of the time. I look as it as a good think.... Would be more worried if she was into babies!!!

I have 6 18,17,16,14,12 and 10. We are ttc no 7.I'm 39 this year and hubby is 42. I think it will be lovely having just 1 as i have had mine close together.

sosix she openly says she hates her, hates not being my only girl, demanded i wasnt to call baby my princess as thats what iv always called her.
i actually dont even trust leaving her in same room as baby on her own.
i know its jealousy and am hoping she gets over it, she'll have to.

Oh ginger (((hugs))) That must be really tough. She probably doesn't mean it and like yo say she is jealous and attention seeking I would think.

Is it possible to spend some one to one time with the teen? Perhaps would help?