Finding it hard tonight

[PurpleChrayn]

I'm having a hard time getting to sleep. I can't stop thinking about all the people who went to sleep a year ago, unaware of what was to come in the morning.

DH has been watching an Israeli documentary charting October 7 hour by hour, and I couldn't even make it through the first episode, where the terrorists were driving up to the kibbutzim.

I've just gone in to my daughter's room and given her a hug as she sleeps.

Right? All those people and no idea what was on its way. And the hostages. We pray for them every week but it's not helping right now.

Sending you hope across the miles, Purple.

Sending hugs with Spuyten's hope😘. I don't know if it's a comfort, but you're not alone in struggling; my social media was filled across the board with fellow Jews of all types going through it last night, and again this morning.

You know the prayer we say when we visit a shiva house, Hamakom Yenachem Eschem B'soch She'ar Avlei Tzion ViYerushalaim? Hashem should comfort you among the rest of the mourners of Tzion and Yerushalaim. Finding it very appropriate and fitting right now. Hashem should give you comfort as you mourn individually but not alone, a part of a community of mourners, the rest of our Jewish nation. Both in Tzion; Yerushalaim, and across the rest of Israel and the diaspora; we mourn together.

Really difficult. My heart hurts so much.

I am single and have no Jewish family in the UK. Just a DC and DGC in Israel.

Thankful for community.

I'm going to shul tonight.

hi @Towerofsong - your post struck a chord with me. You might not have immediate Jewish family in the UK i.e. parents, siblings etc. But we are all family to some degree. Do you live near a Jewish community at all? I have had amazing welcomes from all sorts of Jewish communities from Reform to Orthodox, Israeli, Sefardi in the UK over the years.

Thank you for this thoughtful post
I am some way away from the main Jewish centres, for particular reasons I hadn't been to shul frequently, that has now changed and I am getting to know people but it all takes time, especially in a 'provincial' area. It's not like being in Israel where you go to shul one week and are invited for lunch and make friends quickly.

It definitely helps going to shul and to shul social events though. It's just not the same as having people you can pick up the phone to or sit on Friday night with and actually talk about it all to, who get it.

BTW I lived in Riverdale for several years, I know it well. Now I am in NW London but go back a few times a year to see my friends in NYC.

@ladybranstonpickle Love it. My grandparents lived just below Riverdale for over 50 years. Typical of the Jewish diaspora, we ended up in the US, some in Uruguay, some in NW London. Mostly lucky to have got out.

I know what you mean.
But one thing that always warms me up.is knowing that wherever I am in the world, I can go to shul and join in.

The power of knowing so many people all around the world speaking the same language, saying the same (or similar) prayers feels rather special to me.