Advice Needed

[Emeraldlady1]

I’m off to spend the weekend with a small group of friends. I’m the only Jewish one. One of them who I’m not that close with has been posting a lot about the Israel situation and she’s very against Israel.
She’s not an aggressive type person so I’m not worried about that. I feel pretty strongly against some of the things she’s posted. How would you act in this situation? Part of me thinks I should speak up and let her know she’s misinformed but part of me thinks it will backfire and I should say nothing.

I would personally avoid any conversation about it at all. Even if she brings it up herself, I'd ask that she stops talking about it. "I completely disagree with you on this matter but this really isn't the time or place". It will just ruin your weekend away.

I say this as someone who no longer discusses Israel with her own family because of our differences in opinion 🙃 I'm more of a lefty, they're very right... It's best to just not talk about it! No one is going to convince anyone else they're wrong anyway, so it's pointless.

Whatever you decide to do - good luck! I hope you have a lovely weekend and that the sun makes a rare appearance for you and your friends ☀️

I agree with Hum on this, just say you'd prefer not to talk about it while you're having a nice weekend. I recently took my BIL's partner to task while we were away and she was parroting absolute crap she'd read on IG and it was incredibly awkward and rattled me for a while after. Not worth it and if the last few months have taught me anything, you're just not going to change an entrenched mind.

I mean, obviously if she starts going all 'Hitler had some good ideas and don't you just love those Houthi guys', then yes, you should probably speak up😂

I admire your tolerance. I no longer speak to anyone who I know is anti-Israel, including close family members. They are not worthy of my company 🙃
Sorry not helpful I know 😐
I'm not suggesting you should do the same.

Sending solidarity and strength, that doesn't sound like a fun situation!

Yes, PP's are exactly right, just shut down conversation on it.

An insurmountable crater has opened up between me and most of my friends since 7/10, being from the demographic that mostly holds idiotic views. But we need to be practical - I continue to enjoy them as friends, but often drip into conversation some of the realities you won't find on BBC (eg. half of my family in Israel hasn't been home in 7 months...) and internally treat them with a little pity for being so easily swayed by idiocy...

Thank you so much, I really appreciate the responses. All started off well and nothing has been said so far. I think you are all correct and it is best not to engage with talking about it. It’s true that unfortunately we’re unlikely to change anyone’s mind who subscribes to that way of thinking, so no point in even trying unless I want a huge debate (argument) which I don’t.
Shabbat shalom everyone.

The way I handle it is to say, if a Holocaust 2.0 happens - and it’s not that unlikely given the rise in antisemitism and how the events leading up to the Holocaust are being mirrored identically today - us Jewish folk have to say “Who you gonna call?”.
The answer is Israel
Israel didn’t happen because of the Holocaust. The Holocaust happened because there was no Israel. You can disagree with the actions of politicians but that’s VERY different to believing the ONE Jewish state should be ethnically cleansed and the whole of the world’s Jewish population are at serious risk.

Or just be super blunt and if she’s asks, ask why it’s relevant to you and remind her it’s deeply antisemitic to collectively blame Jews for the actions of the Israeli government

I wasn’t prepared thank goodness, I’d have swerved the event, but I was setting up a hall with a woman who was performatively removing Israel flags from bunting. Honestly I choked, there were only 3 of us setting up and I didn’t know either of them- new community, making friends situation.

She cornered me (not difficult in an empty room!) and said she has permission and then that she’d visited and they should have been banned from the contest. I wish I’d said something pithy about Hamas and music festivals but instead I said, “I understand what you’re saying and I completely disagree.” She then noticed by Magen star but was completely friendly.
Most anti Israel people in this country don’t feel it that strongly imo, it’s a tribal left/ oppositional/ young thing.

@Lamelie sorry you went through that and well done for standing up to her.
I’ve been meaning to update this thread as we did have a confrontational moment at the end of the weekend.
I happened to mention being Jewish in conversation. She then brought up Israel straight away which I really didn’t expect to happen. In her second sentence said of course I think that Zionism is elitism.
I was honestly so shocked at this statement, to think she felt so comfortable to say that to
my face. I told her I thought she was wrong and moved the conversation on swiftly.
I’m still shocked she said this, but clearly she doesn’t understand what it means. What do others think?

I'm not Jewish but I think that anti-Zionism is the excuse for being anti-Israel for many. Others don't understand it or its history. The lie of settler colonialism is swaying the hearts (note I did not say heads) of many who are too lazy to ask questions.

I wonder if she would be bothered to watch Simon Schama's History of the Jews, particularly the episode (I think it is 3) where he explains Zionism and why he is a Zionist?

I think she's a fucking moron for thinking "oh, someone Jewish! Let's bring up Israel". I would consider sending her a message telling her that was not ok, but I guess it might cause unnecessary drama so maybe not. Ugh. I really hate people.

I hope you had a lovely weekend away otherwise!