Support thread for those with family in Israel

[lavender2023]

And Friends!

It is a tense and worrying time, thought I should start one.

My SILs are in central Israel but we still worry. One has a one year old baby....

I hope that you can find the strength to get through this awfulness and that your relatives and friends are OK.

Only distant cousins in Israel and have never met them

However here to show you support. Hope your family keep safe 💐

Such a worrying time. Thanks for starting this thread.

My DH is British Israeli - moved to England as a teen with his mum before army service (which he now regrets as he wants to go and fight!). He has an aunt and uncle in Tel Aviv, and some cousins in Ashdod and Lod, plus lots of friends dotted around.

He's barely been off his phone since October 7th, waiting for updates from them.

I have a SIL in Bat Yam (she has a safe room in her flat) and she is married with a baby. Another SIL in Ramat Gan (but she has no safe room and has to hide under a concrete staircase!) We asked the SIL in Ramat Gan why she wouldn't come home but she says she doesn't want to jeopardize her aliyah application (jewish agency says she has to stay in the country!) And she has a boyfriend now so i suppose that is the emotional aspect.

The bright side is no one in my family has been called up; one of my BIL is Israeli from birth (but grew up in America). He moved back to Israel in his 20s but never did military service so I suppose wouldn't be called up?

Most people I know seem to have family in Israel (and they are mostly British born and bred Jewish people). I do find it a bit surprising as the aliyah stats show that aliyah numbers from the UK are only 600 per year(from 2015) and the demographics in Israel also reflect that...I do think the presence of family there does mean that it is really personal for all of us

This is an eye-opening article from a British journalist with family in Israel. I think it summarises how a lot of people have been feeling:
https://www.jewishnews.co.uk/opinion-the-guardians-coverage-and-my-colleagues-comments-mean-i-dont-feel-safe-at-work/

This is such a sad article (as a Guardian reader!)

I do hold Netanyahu partially responsible for the attacks though. The army should not have taken 12 hours to arrive while those poor kibbutzniks were being slaughtered. This is frankly criminal negligence. I watched a very emotional video by an ex resident of Kibbutz Be'eri and she said that yes the attacks are unprecedented but rocket attacks and aggression have been de riguer for years. No one cared about the border regions, its why many households in Sderot don't even have bomb shelters (and now they don't even have hotel rooms for them so they are probably going to stay in Eilat in a giant tent city). The head of the council in Sderot has resigned in anger from Likud.

Netanyahu wanted violent co-existence with Hamas so that he could be Mr Security and 'mow the lawn' every few years. He could then avoid solving the real problems that politicians in every other developed country have grappled with , like the housing crisis, low earnings and deteriorating public services. People have paid for this strategy with their lives. This isn't victim blaming because the whole purpose of the State of Israel is to protect the Jewish people. And they have failed in the sense that a guy with one eye, in a wheel chair and with most of his arm missing (Mohammed Deif) has managed to orchestrate attacks that have penetrated that 4 billion shekel high tech border wall in 15 different places.

I am angry at the government and worried that my family are in their care!

@lavender2023 I agree with you. I am calling out antisemitism on these threads but I have a lot of issues with the Israeli government and in fact prior to the solidarity rally the only other gathering I've been to in recent times was the "Defend Israel Democracy" campaign in Westminster in March against Netanyahu's overhaul of the judiciary.

Voices like our are essential because we can show that in a democracy you can have people who are opposed to government policy whilst simultaneously being horrified by the attacks and appalled at the casual and overt antisemitism swilling around.

I have close family in Israel, cousins who have been called up and friends right across the country.

For anyone in the diaspora who wants to feel closer to everyday life there, I can strongly recommend the Times of Israel "Israel stories - wartime diaries" podcasts which have been running daily since October 7th. They are individual first person stories lasting about ten minutes each. And they are excellent.

Thanks for starting this thread.

There is a report out that 70% of British Jews have family in Israel, and hence it is so close and personal.

My DD and DGC are in Israel. We made Aliyah and lived there for 7 years, then came back here and then DD went back over.

DD's partner knows 1 murdered,1 hostage. Someone who was in my DS' class at school in Jerusalem was murdered at the festival.

DD and DGC are slightly outside Tel Aviv and in and out of their safe room. I know they are safe enough but it's still a huge worry, I have the app so I know when they have a siren.

I'm struggling as we all are to deal with the absolute horror of Oct 7th. This week I have managed to sleep better and restricted how much news I look at on my phone. I have no idea how to deal with it all, and I suspect there is not ever going to be a way to. Only life pre Oct 7th and life post Oct 7th

On top of that dealing with anxiety about my family, seeing the frightening anti semitism in general and on social media including here.

Worried for the soldiers in Gaza.

Also struggling with the scenes coming out of Gaza.

I am critical of the current Israeli government, I also think the government has made mistakes and could have done things better in the past. And I feel like I can't even say that to anyone without feeling like I've given the haters ammunition. It's like family isn't it, you can criticise your own family member but G-d forbid anyone else does!

I don't understand why it took the army so long to arrive and it breaks my heart to think of all those people just waiting for help to come.

I'm not really involved in a community, only a small dispersed work network. I've had a lot of support from some of my non-Jewish friends for which I am thankful. Just rambling here, it's late, I'm so tired.

I hope your DD and DGC keep safe! My MIL doesn't seem worried despite having 2 DDs and DGC there but maybe she is hiding it really well.

What is the app? I read haaretz and they do post when there are sirens there.

I do agree the antisemitism is scary but I refuse to live in fear and will go to synagogue. People have assured me they can't tell that DH looks Jewish. I have decided I will not call his name in public just in case as it's a Hebrew name.....

The app is Home Front Command and you can set which areas you want to get notifications for.

I know, I tend to run on the anxious side anyway, I'd probably feel a lot better if I was over there too rather than far away.

I've started visibly wearing my Magen David and I was talking to someone today who has taken to wearing a kippah on principle. I live in a small country town, if I lived in an area with different demographical characteristics I probably would be more cautious and definitely more afraid.

I live in north London within the eruv (though my denomination is liberal but it means my MIL can walk over on shabbat)! My specific area isn't visibly Jewish but sufficiently Jewish that people can post on the local Facebook group about Hebrew lessons and the movie Golda without inciting hateful messages. But based on the census, the neighbourhood in the next street (HGS) is 50% Jewish!

My DH grew up nearby and used to wear a kippah (he went to an ultra orthodox primary and later a mainstream Jewish secondary) and he says local kids used to throw stones at him despite him living in an orthodox Jewish area. Everywhere in London is connected to elsewhere and the surrounding areas can be very mixed. It's why his alma mater says that the kids don't need to wear their blazers on the bus. It's better for women I think, my orthodox MIL just wears a cloth hat and long skirts and a regular coat (in blue or jewel colours), in my mind, she just looks bohemian. Some of the orthodox Jewish women do have a very distinctive style esp on shabbat but she isn't one of them.

Shabbat shalom, everyone. The app isn't letting me start a new thread, but I wanted to share a couple of photos of my 3-year-old DD's shulchan Shabbat and the challah she made 😊🥹

❤