When and how to try for second after IVF

[Englishrose35]

Hi all,
I feel so lucky to have my son who is now 9-months. We had ICSI due to both PCOS and male factor (low motility and morphology). I’m 37 now and at the time of IVF I was 35. We are very lucky to have 4 Frosties from that round of IVF as the first transfer worked. I’m not going to lie, I found IVF and also the pregnancy incredibly difficult. My birth was also traumatic as I had a very large post partum haemorrhage soon after my planned c-section and my recovery took a long time. Maternity leave has been exhausting but I am so grateful everyone for little one.

DH and I know we would like a second if we are lucky enough again. We have decided that we would wait 1-year from the birth before trying. Ideally, I would want to wait longer than this/ have a bigger age gap and give myself more time BUT I am conscious of my age and carrying a pregnancy was tough, so will only feel more difficult as I get older. Though obviously the embryos which are frozen were frozen at my younger age 35.

The options are from 12-months

try naturally - if so, how long/ how many cycles for? My period has come back but I plan to have completed stopped expressing/ pumping by 12-months. I know there are lots of stories of conceiving naturally after IVF so I’m happy to try but don’t know if it’s worth it and all the stress. Part of me also feels strange/ guilty trying naturally when there are 4 frozen embryos..has anyone felt like this?

go straight to FET - we have 4 chances which is good but I’m scared of the whole process again (even just the transfer) and the wait.

im thinking of scheduling an appointment with the clinic privately at the 12-month mark before I go back to work to also get a plan, but wondered what others in this situation have done.

thanks

How long did you ttc spontaneously before moving on to ivf? I’d say if you tried two years without luck, then my own mind would ask why go through that again. Also, I wonder if there’s a difference between known fertility issues and unexplained issues for anecdotal spontaneous conception after ivf (I don’t know the answer to this, but again, my instinct is that with known issues that are unchanged, the difficulties would be the same.

we were mfi (v low morphology and other markers for dna damage) and my age and DOR (36 at beginning of ttc). I’m currently almost 30 weeks pregnant after 5 rounds of ivf and two spontaneous pregs that ended in mc. So I know it’s possssible to conceive without intervention but worked out at once every two years. If I had surplus embryos from my younger self, the questions I’d be asking myself would be whether I wanted to try for any more embryos before I aged further and then start transferring or go straight to transferring. You can always try between transfers, spread them out over a year maybe. I have v low amh and only made two blasts over 5 cycles, so money wise it wouldn’t make sense, and age wise, I’ll be 41 before being ready to try again. I think becuase our ivf chances would be so extremely low by that point, we’ll try without ivf, and without getting our hopes up until my eggs run out, and focus on our baby that has beaten all the worst odds. But if I were in your situation, yeah I’d either get one last lot of eggs/embryos gathered or go straight to transferring.

sorry I rambled about myself so much there, was just trying to figure my way through your situation using mine as a guide. Hope some of it was helpful! 🫠

I could have written this 6 months ago! I also have PCOS and we had ICSI due to MFI, and have 4 embryos frozen.

On first cycle we had 1 failed, 1 cancelled cycle and then struck gold and had our wonderful 18month old.

I haven't use contraception since baby arrived, didn't pick up on any ovulation or have a natural period. We approached the clinic when baby was 14 months to schedule next transfer. Since then I've had had one cancelled cycle and one failed. TBH I feel the delays with the clinic are HUGELY frustrating, and as we know nothing guaranteed with IVF. In hindsight, I wish I had approached the clinic sooner and got the wheels in motion for this transfer.

The transfer was easier this time, but I won't lie, the waiting was probably harder for me.

Best of luck x

If you would like a bigger age gap if I was in your shoes I would probably start trying naturally soon and then maybe in 6 months do a fet if nothing happens. There is always a possibility of getting pregnant naturally quickly so you would need to be prepared that this is a possibility I guess. I’ve heard of people getting pregnant naturally after ivf but it’s quite rare. At 37 I wouldn’t be taking my time personally.