FET measuring behind

[SP2024]

We had a 5 day frozen embryo transferred on 30th January, got a positive test on 11th February. My pregnancy tests have been getting stronger and I did a digital last wee that said 3+ (and increase from the week before that was 2-3). Had our early scan yesterday and was meant to be 6 weeks 5 days. The sonographer struggled to see a fetal pole although yolk sac and main sac seen. Then she did get the fetal pole but said it was measuring 6 weeks so 5 days behind. No heartbeat could be seen either. I’ve got to go back next week for a repeat scan but they have basically told me it’s unlikely to progress. Has anyone had experience of this? I’m terrifying of a miscarriage, of having to tell work as then they will know we are trying, of not knowing how long it will take or what to expect. I’ve had infertility for a long time, had embryos not implant but have never had a miscarriage before. And part of me wants to continue to hope but is that silly?

Not silly at all - this journey is hell but it’s not uncommon for a heart beat not to be seen at 6wks.

I saw a HB at 7wks, sadly lost the baby at 7+2 but didn’t find out until 10wks.

I have everything crossed for you

I'm sorry that sounds so stressful! I haven't had personal experience with this but I don't think it's silly to hope, the week's wait will be tough enough so whatever gets you through it. Whatever happens you will deal with the feelings and next steps then, but until then there's no point using up energy grieving something that hasn't happened (easier said than done of course). And I have heard of embryos catching up at that stage and it can still be too early for a heartbeat, I really hope that is the case!! Also I've had sonographers struggle more than others with measurements in general so it's feasible at that early stage it's harder for some than others to get the measurements just right. With regards to work, if you are in the UK (or a country with similar rules) can you self-certify if you need to take time off, with a vague explanation if you don't want to tell them? Don't let this add additional stress to the situation!

Mine was measuring 3 days behind twice (6+4 at 7weeks and 8+1 at 8+4).
i also didn’t get a positive test until 3 days behind most people (not til 8dpt or 13dpo) xxx

I’m sorry that happened to you. If you don’t mind me asking, what did you choose about management? Did you take medication or wait and see what happened? I don’t think I like the idea of surgical intervention but I also don’t think I could cope with just waiting around

Thanks for your response. Yes I’m in the UK so could self certify but I’d still have to tell my boss something. Technically it would count as pregnancy related so there is no action and they couldn’t take it into account for any further sickness, but I’m just not sure I want them knowing I’m trying. I’m also getting a new boss in two weeks and it’s not a great start is it?

I took medication. If it happens again, I’ll opt for surgical. Everyone is different, I’m sure but for me it was the most painful thing I’ve been through and messed me up a lot mentally.

I have everything crossed your little miracle is absolutely perfect 🥰🥰🥰

Thanks for sharing your experience. I was convinced after the scan it was just too early, but now I’m leaning towards it being unlikely. I’ve spent all morning feeling nauseous though so that’s fun…

Oh gosh, I’m so sorry. The only bit that scares me about the surgical route is possible adhesions and my womb has already had several operations I didn’t want to add to it if I could avoid it. I wish you all the luck in your future attempts x

My 4 yr old son started out this way also. I didnt get a positive test until 9dp3dt but it was so faint my husband couldn't see it, it darkened up a little by 11dp3dt and by 14dp3dt my beta hcg was around 92. Then at 15dp3dt I started spotting. At my first scan he measured 5 days behind and I was told the pregnancy wouldnt be viable. He grew each week but stayed 5 days behind the entire pregnancy, so my dates were changed after my 12week scan came back normal. He was born 7lb. I think your still in with a shot but if you were further behind id say things wouldn't progress. Before him we had a pregnancy test at the right stages so to speak but hcg wasnt raising like it ahould and at our first scan we were 9 days behind and we ended up having a mmc by 9 weeks.

Just a bit of an update if anyone is reading this in the future. We went back a week later and there was a slow heartbeat but baby hadn’t really grown.

I had to go back twice more for scans and today my baby’s heartbeat had stopped. I’d kind of expected it as the heartbeat was slow or faint at previous scans and baby hadn’t grown. But I still had a tiny bit of hope.

Now I’ve got to decide what route to go down. I know I can’t do the waiting around route but I’m really torn between medical and surgical. The nurse says surgical is quicker and what most people choose who want to try again quickly, but I’m worried about adhesions. The medical management option feels like it would be extremely painful but I don’t know if I need to go through it to process it iyswim.

@SP2024 I’m so so sorry to hear your baby’s heartbeat has stopped, it’s completely devastating and I’m sending you a really big hug. A similar happened to me last week, I went in for my 7 week scan after seeing a heartbeat the week before, but it had since stopped. It’s a really tricky decision with how to manage it, personally I have decided to go with the surgical route and will be having the procedure on Wednesday.

For me I couldn’t bear the thought of having to go through it physically, and I’m scared of the pain. But I can also understand that some people might feel they need to go through it to process it, and I of course completely understand your fears about adhesions, especially if you’ve had surgery before. Can your IVF clinic help at all? Do they have any advice for you? I think it’s a very personal decision and you’ll make the right one for you ❤️
Whatever you choose, it’s going to be a shit time but I’m wishing you all the love and hope and light to recover and move forward afterwards 💛✨

@Sunnydaysahead1 I’m sorry you’re going through this as well. It truly sucks, especially after such a long road to get here. Feel like I’ve ticked off another crap bingo card in the trying to have a baby set to go alongside the failed embryo transfers and the infertility.

I went through this in August. Healthy heartbeat at 7 weeks, to find out little one had died a few days later but found out at 10 weeks.

I had the medical management and would never ever go through that again. It’s traumatised me to be honest.

Im so sorry your going through this. There is medication you can take that help the process along if you dont want to do surgical, it usually works within 24hrs . I have done surgical a couple of times and for me found that easier and painless then mc naturally which sometimes wont happen on its own or can take some time. Its a very personal choice and there is no wrong way to do it.