TTC, IVF and wanting a new job

Strawberryicecream281 · 2025-04-08T13:01:01+00:00

I'm 29 and I think I'll be doing IVF in spring or summer time after nearly two years TTC. I've stayed in a job I find really repetitive and dull for longer than I wanted to because I was hoping for maternity leave. The salary is not great and this also bothers me. I've tried to get pay rises, have undertaken professional development etc but the job isn't going to change. The job is not stressful and because I'm now very competent at it, I finish my work quickly and have far too much time to think which is adding to my anxiety and low mood. I have an interview coming up for a more challenging much more interesting role at the same wage. I just don't know whether to change jobs now - I could stay in my current job and IVF would fail and I would feel like I'm not moving forward in any way in my life. Or I could start a new job, be successful at IVF but not be entitled to maternity leave, be stressed etc. Time is ticking on and I don't have a baby or a job I feel happy enough in. I'm tired of putting my life on hold for TTC. Any advice is welcome thank you x

shesellseashells3 · 08/04/2025 14:22

Hi @Strawberryicecream281 - are you in the UK? If so you're entitled to 52 weeks maternity leave if you're classified as an employee, and if you're not pregnant yet, then realistically it's likely you'll have worked for a new company for almost a year before you're heading off. If the pay is better then the trade off could well be better in the long run! I have also been TTC for nearly 2 years and planning to start IVF soon and wish I had already changed jobs! You don't need to mention at interview if you don't want to, but you could contact their recruiting officer for information on their fertility and maternity policies as some companies now do offer support for time off for IVF appointments. It's so hard to gauge and stressful to think about starting a new job with unknown colleagues when you might be going through the turmoil of IVF, but if you're unhappy where you are then I'd say take the leap :)

Original poster

Strawberryicecream281 · 08/04/2025 15:40

shesellseashells3 · 08/04/2025 14:22

Hi @Strawberryicecream281 - are you in the UK? If so you're entitled to 52 weeks maternity leave if you're classified as an employee, and if you're not pregnant yet, then realistically it's likely you'll have worked for a new company for almost a year before you're heading off. If the pay is better then the trade off could well be better in the long run! I have also been TTC for nearly 2 years and planning to start IVF soon and wish I had already changed jobs! You don't need to mention at interview if you don't want to, but you could contact their recruiting officer for information on their fertility and maternity policies as some companies now do offer support for time off for IVF appointments. It's so hard to gauge and stressful to think about starting a new job with unknown colleagues when you might be going through the turmoil of IVF, but if you're unhappy where you are then I'd say take the leap :)

Hello! Thanks for your reply 😊 yes I'm in the UK. Ok that makes sense and is really helpful thanks. I found their mat leave policy online which I will read through.

I always wish I'd already changed jobs! But I was always hoping to conceive and it never felt like the right time.

Thanks for your help and I wish you the very best with your journey especially IVF 😊

OP posts:

OneWaryCat · 08/04/2025 17:19

I agree with PP. Also, if you get pregnant, you won't want to return to a job you already are bored and frustrated by. Most places will give you their full mat leave allowance if you have worked there for a period of time, usually 6 months.

xMrsxHx87x · 08/04/2025 20:50

Go for the job! I changed jobs knowing IVF was in the pipeline. I hit the top of the waiting list after 6 months in the new role (and I was promoted internally in the new place at the same time as I got the go ahead for IVF). However I ended up having to delay the IVF due to an unrelated medical issue. Fortunately for me I got lucky, it worked, and I'm currently pregnant, but by the time I go on mat leave I'll have worked in this job for 21 months. The likelihood of you not being eligible for maternity pay is slim - the IVF process takes longer than you think and there is the option to delay if needed (I have a friend who did this to ensure that she would qualify for mat pay). Good luck!

Charmofgoldfinch · 09/04/2025 08:32

I’d also go for the new job OP. I put my life on hold a bit whilst TTC naturally and like you I got upset/ frustrated about not having a baby whilst i was also unhappy in my old job. I changed jobs last May, and during my induction I got a call from the IVF clinic to say they would put me forward for IVF! It then took almost a year for further tests and for treatment to start so it does take time. And like a PP said you can delay your treatment too so if delaying by a month or 2 means you would get better Mat leave/ pay then do that.
wishing you good luck for both job and IVF 🍀

Original poster

Strawberryicecream281 · 09/04/2025 11:15

OneWaryCat · 08/04/2025 17:19

I agree with PP. Also, if you get pregnant, you won't want to return to a job you already are bored and frustrated by. Most places will give you their full mat leave allowance if you have worked there for a period of time, usually 6 months.

That's a good point, I don't want to dread going back after mat leave! And I know you have to go back for at least three months at my current company otherwise you have to pay them money back. Thank you!

OP posts:

Original poster

Strawberryicecream281 · 09/04/2025 11:16

xMrsxHx87x · 08/04/2025 20:50

Go for the job! I changed jobs knowing IVF was in the pipeline. I hit the top of the waiting list after 6 months in the new role (and I was promoted internally in the new place at the same time as I got the go ahead for IVF). However I ended up having to delay the IVF due to an unrelated medical issue. Fortunately for me I got lucky, it worked, and I'm currently pregnant, but by the time I go on mat leave I'll have worked in this job for 21 months. The likelihood of you not being eligible for maternity pay is slim - the IVF process takes longer than you think and there is the option to delay if needed (I have a friend who did this to ensure that she would qualify for mat pay). Good luck!

Congratulations on your successful IVF, that's great! Yes perhaps I'm underestimating how long the IVF process will take and even if starting a new role in the next couple of months I would still have worked there for a decent amount of time. Thanks for your help ☺️

OP posts:

Original poster

Strawberryicecream281 · 09/04/2025 11:18

Charmofgoldfinch · 09/04/2025 08:32

I’d also go for the new job OP. I put my life on hold a bit whilst TTC naturally and like you I got upset/ frustrated about not having a baby whilst i was also unhappy in my old job. I changed jobs last May, and during my induction I got a call from the IVF clinic to say they would put me forward for IVF! It then took almost a year for further tests and for treatment to start so it does take time. And like a PP said you can delay your treatment too so if delaying by a month or 2 means you would get better Mat leave/ pay then do that.
wishing you good luck for both job and IVF 🍀

Thank you for the advice, I'm sorry you felt the same way but it's completely understandable! Delaying treatment is also something I could consider if it made a big difference money wise. Good luck with your journey ☺️

OP posts: