Hi,
Ive changed my username as I have posted quite a few times before. Basically I’m going through infertility. Today, sat in work on our lunch and one of the women started a guess the mum game- famous person/character etc. So she would say clues and we would have to guess who the Mum was. Had two/three goes and everyone was having fun then I had this feeling inside that this is more than a random game and it felt like an announcement was coming. At this point, I left the room and went and tried to compose myself for 10 minutes before I would have to plaster on the smiles. It’s not about the other person- it’s about me and my pain. The pregnant woman is perfectly nice.
So there I was on the other side of the building, a colleague that knows what I’m going through sent me a text asking if I’m okay and whether I want her to come to me or to be left alone. A minute later, my line manager arrives shouting oh you’ve missed the happy news person x is having twins!!! Come and join us. I could feel my pain burning away and was dragged back to the room. I just feel like a right t*t.
Start fertility treatment in a couple of weeks. I know nobody has done nothing wrong. I’m currently sat at home and just can’t stop crying. I’ve made up an excuse for why my Mum can’t come round tonight and just want to be a vegetable by myself. Please someone tell me to get a grip.