Azoospermia support - Part 2

[WhiskeyInTheJar33]

@2022ttc
@Ljp2022
@lemons44
@IslaO
@Carla2601
@TheFanciestPants
@HoustG
@Sleeter0893
@Creatingspace
@Nats140
@pomdownunder1
@Annies1992
@Lily1994

As the old thread is almost full, I thought I'd start up a part 2 so that we can all continue our journeys together!
Apologies if I have missed anyone x

Oh @StarJasmine93 you really can’t 😂.. hopefully it’s a wonderful anniversary for you both! The journey just gets more interesting every appointment doesn’t it.

Of course, I’ve listed them below. If I come across anymore I’ll share them too.
@Emmatheembryologist (a great podcast too)
@Pathstoparenthood
@Drtimchild
@dcpjourney2_rp
@@Definingmum

xx

Thanks @Disco24 ! Will give them a follow 😊.

Do you mind me asking how you went about choosing and liaising with the supplier and your clinic?

Whilst we don't know the outcome of the MTese yet, we are open to donor and so want to almost be in a position of having a shortlist of donors when we go for the MTese so that we can progress quickly down that path.

Congrats @WhiskeyInTheJar33 xxxx

We have had a step back as DHs tese was cancelled, rearranged for 3 months later. We were set to start ivf for Oct/Nov but now looking more like jan/Feb which is disappointing. Was really hoping to start in 2024.

@Disco24 ooo, sounds lovely. Where are you going in honeymoon? Somewhere hot I hope after the weather we've been getting!

@StarJasmine93 you first need to decide what is important to you in terms of where the donor comes from and whether you are OK with having a large number of families with the same donor (see previous comment). Then you need to decide whether you want to see photos or not, either adult or children. UK ones you don't see pics but EU ones, you can. This will help you decide which banks to look at. Then you need to decide what is most important to you, physical features or personality traits and whether you want a big bio about them or limited details. All options are OK and personal to yourself!

You then need to confirm what the rules are for your particular clinic. Mine allowed us to use Cryos and any UK bank but not USA ones. They had some in stock from Cryo that were free to use as part of our NHS treatment but these were the basic ones with little info and not many matched my husband. If you wanted to use your own from Cryo, you could, but you had to pay for the sperm yourself which was about 1500 a vial I believe. Then you have to pay for the delivery as well. Not sure what the delivery costs are from cryo as we didn't use them. Then if you use an EU bank, you also have to pay a one off fee for admin charges to ensure the sperm is applicable with UK rules (this was just my clinic and may be different for yours). This fee was £400 I think. If you used a UK bank (as we did) the admin fee was waived as they automatically abide by the same rules. The cost of the sperm was considerably lower at £700 a vial. Then you have to source delivery and get quotes on how much this costs. We used CryoA2B and this cost £450.

Once you've chosen your donor you have to contact the bank, transport and clinic to align up all the dates and times. There's multiple forms to fill in and then you pay and it gets delivered to the clinic! Once it's on site, you can start your treatment as usual.

Oh and you also have to decide how many vials to buy. We got 2 with the knowledge thay we may need more. Hope this helps!

@jaspercats Oh it's been shocking hasn't it! We're off to Italy, so going to enjoy some nice wine and Aperol's whilst I still can 😂

Thank you also for the run down of your donor search. Ours was similar but slightly different. And I totally agree that what you look for is so personal, there's no right way to do this, we're all just finding a path through.

@StarJasmine93 For us, the lab at UCLH provided us with the 4 banks they work closely with to choose from (London sperm bank, European sperm bank, Semovo Ltd and Brighton Fertility Associates). But similarly to Jaspercats we still had to decide on how much resemblance / information etc. we wanted. We signed up to all four, email exchanged with a few to see if they had any profiles to send over that matched our requirements and to be honest there were very few.

We chose our donor and then arranged with the clinic payment, and signed the documents. We asked them storing extra there, or the possibility of siblings, and the clinic don't store it and couldn't confirm further samples so we've bought 6 vials hoping we have enough for siblings (I'm also doing IUI which is one vial = one round, unlike IVF where one vial = many rounds). We have to pay £300 a year for UCLH to store the samples.

We used Semovo, they contacted the lab at UCLH and they're working between the two of them to work out delivery etc. so our role is done until we complete our final appointments and start treatment. So, similar but slightly different so hopefully multiple stories gives a well rounded view.

@wateringcanface I'm sorry it got postponed! I know you've had a few delays so I'm sorry you've hit another. I hope it's not too long until the appointment.

Thanks so much for taking the time to explain the process that you each went through @jaspercats @Disco24 . It sounds like a lot to think about and as it should be given how much of an important decision it is.

@jaspercats from when you chose your donor to it being delivered at your clinic, what was that timeframe?

So exciting for you that you'll be starting IVF very soon. Keeping everything crossed for you!! x

Hi all,

A bit of a sad update from me today.

We transferred our second embryo and it worked, but we believe it has now ended in an early miscarriage / chemical pregnancy.

All the lines on my pregnancy tests have faded. I am just waiting to have a second blood test on Wednesday to confirm that my HCG has gone back to non pregnancy levels.

I just feel so defeated. We've had 4 transfers, with 5 embryos (one was a double) and this was the closest we got. I am so tired. I don't understand why it just won't work for us. I'm even on immune meds in case it's my body attacking the embryos. Why won't it just work 😢

We will be doing a fourth egg collection as soon as we can but half of me now just really wants to throw the towel in now and give up on it all.

Sorry to put a downer on the thread but I just feel so, so lonely today.

Hi lemons

I'm so sorry to hear this. You've been through so much - this really isn't fair.

I'm probably not in a position to give any advice as we are still sitting tight waiting for a medication miracle but I just wanted to reach out. Your feelings are completely understandable and now is the time to focus on self-care. The next steps can come later.

You aren't alone - you have been the calming voice to so many people on this forum and I'm sure I speak on behalf of many people when I say I am thinking of you tonight xxxx

@lemons44 so sorry to read your news. This journey is just so unfair and tough ...

I agree with @sackofpotatoes123 you are not alone here 🤗 🤗🤗

Awww @lemons44 I am so sad and sorry to read this 😞. You don't deserve this at all.

Agree with @sackofpotatoes123 you need some you time. Time for self care. A holiday perhaps to focus on you and hubby.

We are all here if you need us @lemons44. Thinking of you xxxx

@lemons44 oh I'm soo sorry this transfer didn't work for you! Have been thinking about you and wondering if your OTD was coming up!
You've been through soo much already, this process is soo unfair sometimes! I was hoping this was the one! Sending you lots of love and virtual hugs.

@lemons44 I'm so sad to hear your news. You really don't deserve this. Please try and stay positive, although I know it's really hard. This is closer than you've got before so something is working. Maybe have a break and go on holiday somewhere to focus on something else and have some fun then come back to it ready to try again?

@lemons44 so sorry to hear this, so so unfair and heartbreaking. Like others have said you are always so supportive and helpful to everyone in this group and you deserve all the luck. Thinking of you xx

@lemons44 I'm so so sorry to hear this. As the others have said, we're all here for you. Sending lots of love x

Thank you everyone for your comments. They really mean so much to me, I can't even tell you.

I was worried that by posting I may make others worry about IVF so I also just want to say that our consultant thinks our issue is maybe that we have higher than normal rate of genetically abnormal embryos and we will likely do PGTA testing on the next round. So nothing to do with sperm/azoospermia and I really hope my update doesn't cause anyone to feel scared for IVF as there's been so many ladies on here who have had luck first time and I just KNOW we are going to continue being lucky with lots of others in this group getting BFPs now and in the future 💗

I think I'm going to take everyone's advice and just take some time out for a while. However I'm wishing everyone all the luck in the world with any teses/microteses/ivf/donor sperm searching that is coming up 💗

xx

@lemons44 I'm so sorry to read this, I can imagine and understand how upsetting this must be, hurdle after hurdle. Sending you lots of love and if you want to talk we are all here for you x

@lemons44 I am so sorry, I had snd continue to have everything crossed for your success and was just checking in to see how you and @WhiskeyInTheJar33 were getting on.

It's such a hard path but a lot of IVF is trial and error and my friend who had a huge number of cycles (I think 15!) to have her twins actually got pregnant the first cycle for her third, so it is definitely possible. I am sure those words feel hollow at the moment but she was an extremely complex case and the fact she will now have 3 lovely babies gives me faith it is possible.

@WhiskeyInTheJar33 massive congratulations, I wish you a healthy pregnancy and a wonderful bundle of joy.

Little update from me, our bouncing baby boy was born last week. There's a lot of scaremongering about IVF and especially ICSI babies being small and there being concerns about health. This isn't our experience as he was unexpectedly an enormous (for us!) 9lbs so thought I would share as I know how anxious I was about everything during pregnancy.

I wanted to thank everyone on here for being so amazing especially during our and others darkest times and if there's ever anything I can help with let me know xxx

@TheFanciestPants thank you! Nearly 16 weeks now, it's hard especially with the journeys we've all been on soo far but trying to enjoy it as best I can but the anxiety is always there.

Congratulations on your baby boy! And a little whopper too at 9lb!!!! Soo pleased for you!!! 🥰 success stories in the azoo club give us hope!

So so sorry to hear about your transfer @lemons44, this journey can be so unfair but I really hope you don’t give up and wishing you so much positivity for your next round.

Massive congratulations @TheFanciestPants, such lovely news 💙💙

It’s very early days but i got a bfp after my recent transfer. We did PGTA testing and that was our only normal embryo! As so many of you have said, the worry really doesn’t stop once you see that positive test but keeping everything crossed! We have our first scan in a couple of weeks 🤞🏻we’re not planning on telling anyone until 12 weeks so nice to talk about it in some way!

@24b congratulations on your bfp! So pleased for you!!! amazing news and another win for the azoo club! The wait for the first scan is probably the worst (for me anyway) - so much harder than the 2ww! Wishing you a happy and healthy 9 months!

@lemons44 I am so sorry to hear this, you really don't deserve all this heartbreak. I hope that you can find the strength to carry on the relentless journey!😔 You are so supportive in this group even with all you're going through. Please take some much needed self care and a holiday ❤️

I haven't really got an update, partner had Tesa in April still haven't started IVF yet. When I called at the beginning of July to start treatment they told me they couldn't fit me in for egg collection this month and to phone again next month! It was a big blow I wasn't prepared for so I'm dreading the next call to them!

Congratulations to all of the azoo babies and azoo bumps it gives me so much hope 🤞

Congratulations @24b

Some good news for us. Oh had tese thus week and they got 11 vials, got no idea what the quality is like but quantity is positive.

@wateringcanface congratulations! Thats great news!
We are having Mtese in a couple of weeks and I am getting quite nervous about it...

We were not nervous in the run up, it was after its done it crossed our mind that they might not actually find anything, and post surgery they gave us a worrying message that first method had failed so they had to do biopsies instead, so obviously that sent us into a spiral, but they rang yesterday with the positive news, so it's all good (apart from oh being very sore).

Easier said than done but at this point it's out of your control so no point worrying. We kind of had the conversation of 'what if it doesn't work' prior which was helpful to us, but can understand why it wouldn't be for others.

@wateringcanface thanks for sharing your experience! It really helps!
The wait must have been so difficult.
We have discussed Option B beforehand as well and we are both keen on it, but still having some sort of hope for Option A🤞