I'm scared I will never have a child

[nutellacrepe]

I'm mid-thirties. Been TTC for 5 years now and having fertility treatment for 3. It's not working. The issue was originally male factor, but now my AMH is dropping too, and I'm getting so scared it will just never happen for me.

I don't know what to do with my life if I can't have a child, it really scares me.

Not sure what I'm looking for here really, just support I guess/ anyone in the same position and worrying about how to come to terms with it all?

(Please don't give me advice on getting pregnant or tell me about your friend who concieved naturally after years of IVF - I've heard it all)

Hi @nutellacrepe
Sorry to hear your going through a hard time.
I'm turning 38 and in the middle of an ivf cycle. We've been trying for 17 years and we haven't been able to have children.
We both have contributing factors. We have male factor and I also have pcos. Treatments we've had prior have failed.
The only one time we managed to achieve a pregnancy , naturally was Dec 22 which turned out to be a chemical .We haven't been able to get pregnant again.
It's definitely hard at times and has impacted my life greatly. Socially and mentally. Be kind your yourself because infertility is not an easy journey. Just know that your not alone and there's lots of us out there if you need support

@MoonlightDreamer Thank you so much for the reply. After 17 years, you must have really been through it all :( I'm so sorry to hear that, it must have been so exciting to be pregnant and then for it to be a chemical... I can't imagine. I have never had a BFP. I'm 13DPO on my current treatment and just got (another) BFN this morning, and no symptoms so I'm pretty sure I'm out.

I have a HyCoSy next month, I'm just crossing everything that it might give us some answers.

I just hate everything about infertility, I don't know about you but I get quite angry/ frustrated about it all at times. I love children and so many people comment how great I am with them, how great me and my DH would be as parents. It just breaks my heart and makes me feel quite resentful about life.

So many of my friends are pregnant, have babies or having their second and it's starting to impact socially as well.
Blah.
Thanks for listening! Gonna try and have a self care day I think.

Hey @nutellacrepe we have also been trying a similar amount of time and also have never had a BFP. Starting to think it will never happen for us too so I share your feelings.

I've tried to cope by changing jobs, major life changes but the sadness never changes.

I also hate the 'oh well it happened to my friend after 10 years blah blah'. Thinking of you and if you need to rant, I am here

I am so sorry! I am going through the same thing, 5 years, 2 failed IVF cycles, countless tests and unexplained infertility. I am 40 and I lost hope and I don't even want to have therapy to deal with the pain because I don't think there anything that can help ease it or make it go away.
Big hug!