How to tell sister we’re looking at secondary infertility treatment

[Williams3001]

For a little context, my younger sister has been trying for about two years but doctors have essentially said she has no chance without IVF, which she currently doesn’t qualify for on the NHS and our parents have refused to fund privately. DH and I have been TTC #2 for almost a year and are looking at private IUI or IVF, which we’re in the fortunate position to be able to afford. We haven’t intentionally kept hidden our TTC journey this time (nor have we intentionally disclosed it) but it also just hasn’t really come up around family, who live quite far and we don’t see all that often. My question really is, if you were in my sister’s position, would you rather I be upfront and share my journey or just keep it quiet?

I have been through IVF treatments for the last 2 years, my sister got pregnant in month 2 of trying. If she chose to not tell me I would have been so offended. Not only did she tell me, we supported each other. How could I not be excited that my sister was pregnant. Some days were extremely hard for me, but that was my issue and I worked through it. I would say tell her, and also ask her how much she was OK with you sharing and take the lead from there.

When you fall pregnant, I would ask her the same thing again and be very mindful if you post pregnancy announcements in group whilst she is still battling fertility.

I'd also suggest she look at Gaia and access fertility. Gaia does finance options for fertility and access fertility does packages. If she has health insurance she may be able to get all the tests done through insurance and do the IVF elsewhere.

We've moved to a clinic in Bulgaria and even with flights and hotel the price is almost 1/3 of UK prices.