Just received our referral... what happens now?

[TinyDancer91]

Quick back ground me (32 next week) & OH (35) have been TTC now for 15 months officially (18 unofficially). We've never had any kind of success, no BFPs, no MMC, no chemicals.

OH had a SA in Jan which took 4 weeks and a chase from the GP to get the results. He was asked to repeat it, so did another one almost 2 weeks ago, still no results back yet...

I had day 21 bloods done in Oct, which had a 'lab error' and I was told they were all ok, until I spoke to my GP in Jan and was told they needed to be re-done due to the lab error... second time came back 'normal'. I've also paid for a Hertility test, which also came back as within normal range.

Spoke to the GP again on Friday and was told that she was going to refer us.

So, I have no idea what happens now. Any help/guidance greatly received!

If you've been through it, what did you wish you knew before?

I just feel so helpless & clueless and like everything is out of my control which scares the hell out of me!

I wish I'd pushed and chased up more, my GP lost letters from the hospital which added to the delays I experienced so always keep copies of correspondence and chase chase chase if you are expecting results/appointments that don't arrive

Thanks @Alarmclockfloor. I'm not very good at being pushy and asking for things I need in person but I'm so want answers... going to get OH to call the Dr again tomorrow to see if the results are in

From my experience, once my gp had referred us to the fertility clinic, it took about 2 weeks to get a letter from them, then probably about a week after that for a telephone appointment.

the telephone appointment was quite straight forward for us, she said we should have IVF and we qualified for one round of NHS funded. She said we could choose which clinic to go with, and we chose a Care clinic just 10 mins away from us.

She the said she’d write a letter back to the GP confirming she has approved the IVF treatment and that we wanted Care. GP then sends a letter to Care to refer us for NHS funded. Then Care writes to me to confirm they have the referral and we can start treatment when we’re ready.

in between all that, I allowed 2 weeks between each point of contact before phoning to chase. You really should feel empowered to chase for your own treatment. It’s not pushy, just ask.

for me, I think it took a month from GP referral to Care clinic confirmation, and we started IVF on my next cycle. It suddenly ramped up speed!

In terms of what did I want to know beforehand, I felt like I was really eager to find out what the end process was, my treatment plan, the dates of things, what injections I would have.

my biggest advice would be to read these forums to get as much advice as you can. It was invaluable to me!

and also, as cliche as it sounds, you really have to take it a step at a time. Just get on the journey, and focus on what you have to go next, not what’s happening in two weeks time. Or even think about babies!

oh, and I would massively recommend Alex Jones IVF documentary on channel W. You see the whole process, from every possible scenario, of IVF. I was so nervous and anxious watching the first episode, like I couldn’t believe we were actually going to be ‘that couple’ who has IVF. Surely that’s for other people!? But the documentary really makes you feel like you’re not alone, and arms you with so much information, you’ll feel ready to get started

@whomoon wow that really highlights differences in care. I still hadn't been referred for IVF 2.5 years after first contacting GP so I had to go private in the end. IVF is such a postcode lottery unfortunately.

@TinyDancer91 my only advise to you at this stage bearing in mind i havent actually even started my treatment yet is to expect waiting. A lot of waiting and delays. Despite going straight to private back in December, for various reasons we still likely wont even start until june!! I was not prepared for that. Keep the communication strong between you and your clinic, make sure you are clear on everything, ask a million questions and ask about timescales so you are prepared. It just all adds to the heartache and stress if you dont. Hope that helps.

Hi @TinyDancer91

I had a similar experience to @whomoon in that our NHS referral went through very quickly, after the GP actually made the referral.

We did however pay for all our private tests before hand. This included a fertility check package at a private clinic and a private surgical sperm extraction for my husband with a private urologist (he has a blockage which means the sperm can't get out, which is our issue).

Once our GP had my bloods and a chlamydia test they sent off the referral. Not sure if you had to do a chlamydia test yet if not they may ask you to do it at your fertility appointment. It's just a swab you do yourself.

They processed my referral and the next day we got a call for our first face to face appointment in five working days. I was shocked. Had that appointment and because of the nature of our issue meaning IVF ICSI is our only option, and the fact we'd had all our tests already, we were booked in for our funding appointment straight away for two weeks after.

Attended the funding appointment where the nurses check eligibility criteria. They then sent off the funding application.

4 weeks later we got a call from our chosen clinic to start treatment. I started IVF yesterday and our NHS referral was made the end of December. So it went very quickly for us. As another poster has said it is such a postcode lottery.

Things I wish I'd know... I suppose the main thing is that NHS can move quickly in some areas. I was prepared for it to be years and we had started our private funding application with access fertility. Luckily it hadn't gone through yet otherwise I would have really kicked myself.

We started with GP in February, she started with me with 21 day blood test and a week after that, smear and Chlamydia plus mmr vaccine (it seemed I missed a shot so I did that), after all of this we have been referred to the clinic (end of february), received the forms a week later (beginning of april) booked SA for the week after. We received a letter last week that we have first appointment on April 27th, as far as I understand they will discuss our results and probably they will check my AF as I'll be on my day 3. What will happen after that I don't know I'll let you know. In the meantime I had my AMH checked privately which came back low, in range for my age but low :( I'll bring this test with me at the first appointment hoping they will send the ivf referral sooner rather than later as I'm also 35 already.

Anyway, at the moment you just need to wait for some forms to be delivered to you, you then need to fill them and send the back, from there you should receive your first appointment.

Hi all, I am in a similar boat to @TinyDancer91, having just been referred to a NHS recurrent miscarriage clinic and not really knowing what to expect now. Still awaiting confirmation of an actual appointment, but I'm glad to be in the system at last.

does anyone know what tests we should expect to have done? Will they all focus on me, or will they also test my partner? I noticed a few previous posters mentioned sperm analyses (at least, I think that's what SA means!) - will this be arranged automatically, or does he need to speak to the GP to arrange it? Or should we bite the bullet and pay privately for this, in the meantime?

Thanks in advance.

@Rabbitjungle1 hi. I have had 3 miscarriages but i went to private recurrent miscarriage clinic after my 2nd as i didnt want to wait. I had 14 vials taken from me and my husband had 1. I also had an ultrasound scan but privately they didnt do anything with my husbands sperm, i dont know if thats any different on nhs.

@Flowerlover010 thank you, it sounds like it is worth a conversation with the GP, at least. Strange that they don't seem to also routinely investigate the partner.

@Rabbitjungle1 actually sorry I just remembered that was when we first went private after my 2nd miscarriage. I then went on to have a 3rd and we decided to try another private clinic who then offered me a further blood test then test my husbands sperm. We then had an NHS referal finally come through he looked through everything we had already done and couldnt add any further tests to it so was a pretty pointless consultation for us. Good luck hope you have some answers

Thanks @Flowerlover010 for this extra detail. Can you remember if you would have been offered sperm analysis at your NHS referral, had you not already paid for it privately?

@Rabbitjungle1 they did not offer it but i think its because we had already got this done with 2nd private clinic. Whatever way you go do make sure you get it checked because it definitely is a factor and im annoyed at our first private clinic for dismissing the man pretty much and only focussing on me.

Hello - we were referred by GP in October 2022 and I had a telephone appointment 2 weeks ago, with a face to face booked for next Thursday. Basic questions on history, sexual activity ect on the phone. My experience wasn't amazing, very cold nurse who seemed rushed and didn't take into account TTC for 3 years. I broke down and she seemed very surprised lol. Also told partner didn't need to be present, but was asked about his medical history. I knew the answers but just odd they don't have you both there!

We previously had a private MOT done so they want these results brought with us to our next app. Private MOT showed possible tube blockage/damage and was suspected PID when younger. FTF is for STD swab and a transvaginal scan. Scan isn't needed again however private recommended HyCoSy to confirm any issues with tubes. NHS were happy to do this next Thursday but I had an awful Hysteroscopy and am terrified of a similar procedure. So she suggested scan again then decide if needed.

Make sure BMI is below 30, mine is 30.5 and you can't access any investigations or treatment even that slightly over (will be asking them to weigh me naked.. kidding).

I'm going to make a list of questions for the appointment as I have PCOS and Hashimotos already diagnosed and would like to speak with an endocrinologist about how these impact fertility and how to improve this. The telephone app was enough to make me realize I need pre prepared questions, including what next steps and time frames are. Don't let them rush you and make sure you have your partner with you and nothing planned for after!

Btw we are in Chester, seems everywhere's v different! Good luck!!