I'm miscarrying, aren't I? Devastated :-(

[RedPandaFluff]

I'm 5 weeks and 2 days pregnant following a frozen embryo transfer. We are so lucky to already have toddler DD so I couldn't believe it when this cycle seemed to work as well. I've been getting really strong positive tests so I felt optimistic.

Today I've been having backache, cramps and just now quite heavy red bleeding. I'm so upset - this isn't spotting, it's very much like a period with bright blood and bits of tissue/clotting.

I can't get through to my clinic or the EPU so I don't know what to do. It's game over though, isn't it?

So sorry you are going through this, sounds heartbreaking.

Definitely try and get to a EPU if you can tomorrow to understand what's happening. Fingers crossed for you

Thank you @BabyOnBoard90 - I'd started believing that we could be lucky a second time and I've been daydreaming about having a baby again, I shouldn't have let myself get so excited.

I'll try EPU again in the morning. I thought about phoning my clinic out-of-hours number but I guess they won't be able to do anything anyway.

Thought I'd post an update in case anyone else is in a similar position - I just did a test and it's gone from 2-3 weeks on Saturday (when I was exactly 5 weeks) to 3+ now that I'm 5+3. This is giving me a little bit of hope as the bleeding has slowed right down. I managed to get through to my clinic OOH last night and I'm going in for a blood test first thing this morning.

I'm praying this is just a random bleed and the baby is still snuggly bedded in.

@RedPandaFluff How are things going?

I’m 5-6 weeks with my first pregnancy and have been bleeding since Sunday afternoon, not super heavy but fluctuating between just brown spots/clots on the tissue and redder bloodier phases.

Was scanned in EPU yesterday and although there’s not much to see at this stage there were indications of something starting to develop in my uterus. Waiting to have 2 blood tests 48 hours apart (one yesterday, one tomorrow) to check the pregnancy hormones are increasing at the expected rate.

Sending you best wishes for a positive outcome x

Hi @Fairylight102 - it's so incredibly stressful, isn't it? It's good that they were able to see something and it's in the right place - did they say they could see a yolk sac and/or foetal pole?

My clinic phoned this afternoon with hcg results - it's at 4253 and the normal range is 200 to 7000, so that's good, but as you say it's more about whether the hcg is rising at the right rate. However initially they said repeat bloods in 48 hours whereas now they're saying come for a scan to see if there's anything developing and to make sure it's not ectopic. So I guess I might find out more on Thursday. It's going to be a loooooong 48 hours!

How are you feeling? Do you have any cramps or backache?

They couldn’t see they yolk sac but said that could be because it’s closer to 5 weeks rather than 6 (which would fit with my cycle being a bit longer than average and later ovulation date).

I have some cramping. I’d been having it a bit since I became pregnant (so when I was first late I thought my period was on its way and was a bit surprised when I tested positive, but apparently cramping can be a normal pregnancy symptom). This afternoon though it has been worse as the bleeding has increased a bit too, which is really worrying.

That’s good that your initial reading is in the right range. When is your scan?

I’m probably really naive but I never contemplated this kind of situation could occur, to be in this kind of slow waiting period having no idea what’s going on. When I went for my scan yesterday I felt reassured by what they said that bleeding was not uncommon and there’s every chance it will still develop as a normal pregnancy, but a day later with the bleeding seeming a bit worse, I’m getting so scared.

They said I wouldn’t need to go to A&E unless the bleeding became uncontrollable/large clots, but it still feels so wrong to be bleeding like this.

Seeing blood - especially when there's quite a bit of it - is shocking and devastating in pregnancy; and I agree that the waiting is so hard. Everything seems to go on hold and you're in a weird sort of limbo until the next scan or the next blood test . . . but even then sometimes you're none the wiser!

Scan is Thursday morning, when I'll be 5 weeks and 5 days. I'm hoping they see a yolk sac and foetal pole - if that's the case, I might be able to let myself believe this can work out.

I'm bleeding quite heavily again, and I have bad cramps. I can't see how we can get positive news tomorrow at the scan.

So, so sad

@RedPandaFluff Really sorry to hear that and sending you hugs. There might still be a chance but I agree it is very worrying.

Sadly I got it confirmed today that I am miscarrying. Apparently even my first blood test on Monday didn’t show normal hormone levels, and the one today was lower again, so with that and the heavier bleeding it’s definitely a miscarriage.

Ahhh @Fairylight102 I'm so sorry! Oh goodness it's just so upsetting. It feels so cruel to go through the hope and excitement of positive tests only to have it all taken away; never mind the pain and the physical symptoms we go through as well.

I hope you're okay although it's going to take some time, I'm sure. I think I'll get bad news in the morning and then I'll just have to start accepting it and processing it.

Best wishes for your scan today @RedPandaFluff

Hi @Fairylight102 - I can't believe I've come back to give a positive update but I had good news this morning. The baby seems to be fine - in the right place, little heartbeat flickering, and the bleed was a subchorionic haemorrhage that seems to have resolved itself.

I'm still in shock. I had mentally prepared myself for them to tell me that it had gone. I'm so happy but I also feel very confused and guilty (I feel bad for giving up hope but honestly, the bleeding and cramping was so heavy, I just thought there's no way this isn't a miscarriage).

I'm praying that this works out - this is our last embryo so no more chances to grow our family after this.

How are you doing? Thinking back to my previous losses, the first few days are really hard

That's great news, glad to hear you and the fetus are fine. Hope things continue to progress smoothly.

Good luck

@RedPandaFluff Oh that’s such great news! So pleased for you that it has worked out ok. The best Christmas present you could ever hope for!!

I’m actually not feeling too bad. After the previous few days of waiting and uncertainty and barely any sleep, it’s almost a relief just to know for sure what has happened and process that.

I’m trying to focus on the fact that miscarriages are sadly common, but many women do go on to have successful pregnancies afterwards. For me also, the fact that I was able to conceive relatively quickly was encouraging because I have PCOS and was worried when I started trying that it might be difficult to get pregnant. Will see what happens in 2023 💙

Ahh @RedPandaFluff so pleased to see you're having another - I remember you from the boards before our toddlers. I had lots of bright red blood with my DD, she was fine. Truly shocked me every single scan that she was still there. Crossing everything for you ❤️

Thank you so much for the lovely message, @BabyOnBoard90!

@MrsC2018 aww thank you! That time seems like another life . . . so glad you have your little one too.

@Fairylight102 sounds like you're getting yourself back into a positive mindset, which is amazing. I always felt so desperate and panicky because the only way we can conceive is through IVF (zero chance of natural conception) so the stakes were always so high in terms of financial and emotional investment.

I'm really hoping I chance across a "it's finally happening" post from you very soon

I’m so pleased for you @RedPandaFluff. I read your message and wanted to reply earlier and say it could be a subchorionic haematoma but didn’t want to give you false hope as I have been on both ends of miscarriage and a haematoma.

They are so scary, I too was convinced it was a miscarriage. The consults who saw me told me she had never seen someone bleed so much with one. They should definitely be spoken about more.

Have you stopped bleeding yet? I went onto bleed for 8 weeks and had a healthy daughter.

Best of luck for the rest of your pregnancy x

Hi @ForestThrills - thank you so much for your lovely message. I'm so glad you went on to have your daughter!

I'm 7 weeks today so it's reassuring to read that you bled for 8 weeks (as scary as that must have been for you!) I've been bleeding on and off, and frankly it's terrifying. On average it's every other day for 4-5 hours, with cramping and a period-like bleed. I feel like it's on a knife-edge - I have a scan on Tuesday 3rd and honestly I don't know what to expect. Sometimes I think there can't possibly be anything left in there because there's been so much blood (and quite often clots) but I'm also hopeful because I haven't seen anything foetus-like come out yet (sorry, that's so grim to write, but I can't think of a better way of expressing it).

It's truly a waiting game and I'm just talking to it all the time, asking it to hang in there and grow strong!

@RedPandaFluff I was the same with my DD, bled from 5+3 until 10 weeks. Bright red blood, period cramps and clots. Never found a reason, I had weekly scans and went to each one truly terrified as I couldn't see how she could still be in there. She was perfectly healthy every time. They never gave me a reason either. It absolutely takes its toll, I I just lived on anxiety that whole pregnancy and was a mess by the time she was actually born. Just take it scan by scan, you've got this!

Thank you so much @MrsC2018 - this really gives me hope, but it sounds like you had a hugely stressful pregnancy! It's sad because it would be lovely to relax and enjoy being pregnant, but when things are so uncertain, that's impossible.