IVF support group and feelings of guilt

[Lisabrown88]

Hi All,

Im going through my second round of IVF. First round the doctors took 34 eggs and had to stop the transfer due to risk of OHSS. Im having my embryo transfer next week and im having alot of anxiety. How have people coped with the stress of IVF and the waiting, also did people take time off work? I have alot of guilt being off work but im so distracted its impossible to work. I have social anxiety which is preventing me from seeing anyone. I binge eat to distract myself. Im upset when i see my friends with new babies. I feel very guilty for having all these feelings and my therapist recommended speaking to others in similar situation. Would love to hear how others are getting on and if there is a whatsapp support group for this

Hi 👋🏼

I am 8 days post egg transfer and I have been in your shoes a couple of weeks earlier with OHSS. Please try not to take work weeks off during your IVF cycle trust me you need the distraction. UNLESS your job is very stressful then I would take a couple of days off.

I am currently within the 2 week wait and I found that this is the most anxious period. Ivf cycles were okay, yes OHSS were a massive struggle for me and I could hardly get out of bed but trust me it gets better!

If you need to message me feel free!!!!!

Hi! Thanks so much for the support, wish you the best of luck and a BFP.

Unfortunately for me work was my biggest anxiety trigger and so had to take off 4 weeks off. Im just feeling so guilty and would feel even worse if this round of IVF doesnt work. How did you feel with socialising? Im struggling to get out of bed and avoiding everyones call as im filled with anxiety and already feel deflated after the first cycle.

What do you feel guilty about ? The anxiety?

34 eggs is an amazing result have you got any updates on how many they fertilised etc?

Please don't feel guilty. I was lucky since my job is mainly work from home so I didn't have to face people. But yes I did feel like I couldn't face anyone. I couldn't even take care of myself let alone take a shower. But you shouldn't feel guilty for anything and by the way I didn't overeat too I was very hungry. As long as you keep up and hydrate yourself throughout the day that's the most important thing!

Sorry it was meant to say I ate a lot too!

I had 17 blastocysts. But deep down in my heart i cant seem to shake the feeling i might fail again. The guilt is for taking time off and leaving the team but my therapist says I need to put myself first. Theres the guilt of also over eating all the wrong things which could affect a successful IVF round. Just feel so alone and dont want to see anyone either. I just wondered if others had same as im seriously struggling.

Did you do anything to help you get out of the mood? Was considering acupuncture as well, did you try that for the transfer?

@Lisabrown88 17 blastocytes that's absolutely amazing! I'd be over the moon if I had that many.

Acupuncture no I considered it but my consultant said it's a waste of time in my case even the acupuncturist I went to said there is not much point since I am considered "young". However, some people say it works for them so if you think it will benefit you get a consultation with them.

In terms of preparing honestly I just laid in bed due to my OHSS and the transfer was straight in the same week. I did take my folic acid etc. but that was about it. I didn't stress much about eating. I just tried to cut down on junk mainly had soup such as chicken soup and 5 fruits a day, drank 2L of water.

I am someone who if I obsess over things I can become very stressed which is not good when your approaching egg transfer. I just took it easy. I know it's easier said then done but try and distract yourself.

@anniz91 thank you regarding the 17! Hopefully it all works out.

Yea I think il just skip the acupuncture, will even stress me more doing something ive never done before on such an important day.

Yes will have to force myself to do other shames. Did you manage to exercise during the waiting period?

@Lisabrown88 just walking the park ... very light exercise

Good, will do same! Thank you!! ☺

Good luck in the next couple of days!

Hi all,
I have just started my first cycle of ivf and was due my scan yesterday after the first week of injections but unfortunately I haven’t had a bleed yet so my consultant has moved it back a week and now I’m so worried this is not normal and becoming more anxious about the journey.
I have become so emotional but can’t explain exactly how I’m feeling to anyone which inevitably is leaving me feeling very lonely, I’m just looking for some support from ladies who have been in the same situation and how you have coped with the different emotions and anxiety.
thank you for taking the time to read xxx

@kayelizabeth85 These are very early days for you. I wouldn't worry to much about the delayed bleed, and the fact that your stressing yourself out isn't going to help that situation.

Anxiety will stay with you until you have the baby in your arms. IVF is difficult personally distracted myself with work has helped me but saying that it doesn't get any easier! Just try to find something that isn't pregnancy or IVF related.

@anniz91 thank you for the reply, I have buried my head into work and just started swimming which is helping with the distraction from ivf but it is hard to switch off 🙈 I don’t know about others but I was really excited to start as we have been planning for a couple of years and now it’s actually here iv never been so scared of anything.