IVF / FET March/April 2022

[AliceAbsolum]

Thought I'd start a thread for those starting rounds in the next few months.

I'm 36. TTC for 6 years. This will be my 4th transfer. It's a double embryo FET in Cyprus.

Welcome welcome 😁

@PMAmostofthetime I think the tiredness is normal.
My first round I was on buselrin, gonal f and menopur. I was very bloated but only a bit tired.
Second round same drugs apart from menopur was swapped to meriofert and my gonal f was increased a lot. Less bloated but utterly exhausted. Day 8/9 which was my weekend, I had to keep having little sit downs and naps. I felt so wiped. My advice is to rest as much as possible and reserve your energy for what your body needs to do.

@HJen22 I remember when my first round got abandoned I was upset but quickly tried to distract myself and it eventually caught up with me a little as I hadn’t really let myself feel all the feelings. It’s so hard to sit in the pain and the not knowing, but once I did I found I gradually built myself back up again by getting back into some exercise and booking a trip away. Not that what I’m saying is the correct thing to do. There’s no right or wrong. I hope you can find comfort in all those around you 💖 my best friend said to me ‘this is shit isn’t it’ and just listened to me cry and that helped me more than people saying ‘oh well it wasn’t meant to be this time, stay positive’.

@Ems123456789 I'm so sorry your first round was abandoned; that must have been so so hard. Yeah I was trying to hold it together today and not be upset but I am of course. Even though I expected the worst, it still hurts. Your advice is much appreciated, it's my birthday at the end of the month and I'm looking on Airbnb now! I wasn't sure if i wanted to go away because I knew OTD if we got that far was likely to be around then. I def also need to use this time to shift a few lbs to feel better physically in myself as well as mentally so exercise is a must!

It is shit isn't it. You ladies, who there are so many, have survived the disappointment and carry on inspire me to keep going x I really hope this is your time ❤️

@PMAmostofthetime I have had really restless sleep. Don’t feel like I have had a proper deep sleep for well over a week now. I’m on day 10 of stims so I don’t think it will settle for me but fingers crossed for you x

@HJen22 so sorry to hear this, it's so difficult to get your head round it but take your time and let the emotions come and go. Our first round was similar, and although we made it to transfer, we had been hanging on by a thread and it didn't work...that was our one and only nhs funded round gone in the blink of an eye. So the good news is you still have funded rounds to go.

It's hard to take but you will get there. As difficult as it is now, this is just part of your journey and you will absolutely get there 🥰
Enjoy the glass of vino!

I went for my scan after 13 days of oestrogen only to find out that my lining hasn't thickened! So another week on a higher dose, then scan to see whether I can start the progesterone! I think my body is just resistant to all these hormones and needs silly doses! Anyway, I think I may join you in the glass of vino tonight too!!

I hope everyone is doing okay, I'm really struggling at the moment to come on here and keep up, so much happens in a day! The weekend is here and the sun will be shining so have a great weekend ☀️

@HJen22 thank you, I've ordered some sleep spray :)

@Ems123456789
I'm on Meriofert and Cetrizine started today. I feel a bit better tonight but I felt awful earlier and super tired.
I'm going to take it easy this weekend-
Work has been super emotional and fast paced this week and I've worked a lot more than my usual.

@Steph2345 it's horrible isn't it I keep getting frustrated with myself in the night.

@Coops0406 That's disheartening, hopefully they can find the right mixture for you soon.

I have been feeling sorry for myself this evening, I am a big baby and I know I'm lucky to even be able to try this but when I was scared to have my Injections earlier as I am petrified of needles. The thought of two was just too much and I was thinking why have I got to go through this? It's not fair I'm a good person, I help everyone and everyone else ( most people) just get to do it the normal fun way and some don't even want it too happen.

Anyways they both got done with some tears and now I'm ok again I think.

@PMAmostofthetime - thank you for tagging me into this thread - hello everyone- mind if I join in ? Wishing you all the very best of courage compassion and endurance for your current journies. I’ve been doing this a while - currently in the middle of an FET.
@PMAmostofthetime , hang on in there. I always think the first few days of stims is really hard as your body adjusts to a new hormonal norm. But adjust it will because the body and brain are clever like that. Hope you manage some rest this weekend x

@HJen22 What a time you are having. No need to hold it together - the only way humans can release the stress hormone cortisol is through tears, so let them flow.
You've done a trial run and you'll be ready and strong for your next go. Ivf is such a marathon not a sprint.

On our way to the clinic in Nicosia now. Just hope we get over the border with covid and everything.

@Coops0406 I'm sorry to hear your first round was similar, it really was hanging on by a thread all week and I'm actually just glad to not be getting a call today. We will get one tomorrow just with confirmation that the embryo has stopped growing.

I joined the new gym in my town last night and we've booked a few nights away at the end of the month for my birthday so looking forward to that. We're also going to buy a plant for the garden today as a sentimental symbol and mark the end of this cycle; I read about it in my book and thought it was a nice idea.

That's disappointing that your lining hasn't yet thickened! I really hope the higher dose improves it and you can get started on the progesterone.

@PMAmostofthetime I'm so sorry you're having a hard time; but believe me, I have also had those days thinking why me. As I'm sure we all have. So let yourself have those days, it's so much to take and the hormones don't help, as well as having a fear of needles that must be so difficult. Know that you are doing amazing and you've got this! Stay strong and be kind to yourself this weekend x

@AliceAbsolum yup, I knew it wouldn't be a smooth quick journey, and I think you really do become more resilient than you'd expect, just have to keep going. Good luck at the clinic today, I hope it's ok getting over the border!

@PMAmostofthetime ahh, you've managed to get it done and that's great. Sorry it's so traumatic for you, hopefully today will be a better day. Are you doing them yourself?
Thank you, yes here's hoping! I'm just so glad this is for the biopsies and not transfer or I would definitely be worried, at least this way they will know what's needed for my FET when it comes around!

@Brightertimesahead are you on a medicated cycle for FET? How are you doing?

@AliceAbsolum exciting but terrifying! Really hope all is okay getting over the border!

@HJen22 that's great, I love the idea of planting something in the garden. And it's fab that you have some exciting things planned, it will definitely help.

@HJen22 aw that sound like you are being really proactive about moving forward and giving yourselves things to look forward to! Believe me a few days off the meds will also help your mood immensely - I never feel like they are affecting me until I stop them and then it’s like a cloud lifting!

@PMAmostofthetime wow huge respect for you going through this with a fear of needles, I can’t even imagine how difficult that must be. Well done for getting the shots done yesterday - you can do it!
And that feeling is way too familiar for most of us I’m sure. It is deeply unfair that we have to put our bodies and minds through all this extra stress and then it’s not even guaranteed to work! It is a lot of work to recondition yourself to find gratefulness for being able to do this at all (as you said) because having to “do this at all” is the unfair part! I think we are all allowed and even expected to struggle with these emotions.

@AliceAbsolum let us know how it went!

@Brightertimesahead welcome :) how far in your FET are you? Is it your first? I’m doing my first FET after a failed fresh transfer next cycle.

@HJen22 Great attitude lady

Over the border and were here. Few tears but relieved to have made it.

@Ems123456789 it's your scheduled transfer today isn't it? Good luck, sending all the love x

@AliceAbsolum so glad you're over the border! But sorry to hear there were tears, was it very stressful?

@SamTTC yes I think you're right. I'm currently still having to take progesterone which is messy but never mind!

@Brightertimesahead I'm so sorry I don't think I welcomed you! Welcome 🤗 how are you? Very supportive ladies in here to offer help, advice and listen to any rants needed x

@HJen22 love the plant idea and well done on the trip away and gym. I hope you are doing okay.

Yes one embryo took the front running place as the other wasn’t good enough quality. I’m booked in at 3pm today to have it transferred. Feeling nervous. Thank you for your well wishes.

@Brightertimesahead welcome, how are you doing with your cycle?

@PMAmostofthetime how are you feeling today?

@Brightertimesahead welcome!

@Ems123456789 Good luck today. Hope it goes well.

@PMAmostofthetime You're very brave doing this with a needle phobia. Must add such an added layer of difficulty.
I've got emetophobia so can slightly understand. Morning sickness is a worry.

DH and I had a coffee in the UN buffer zone. So weird! Barbed wire and UN vehicles everywhere. Then we walked through the Turkish side of the city and saw the clinic and I just cried. Been so long since we were last there and I knew they embryos were in there and it was all just real for me.
But a good cry got all the cortisol out and I felt fine 😊
Lining is great, no concerns. Dr wants to add intralipids due to the miscarriage. I literally don't care any more about whether we should or not, I'm just going to go with it, it's only 100 euros.
She wants us to go again on Wednesday, then transfer probably Monday.
We picked up our meds on the side of the road from a pharmacist off Facebook.... She was lovely, recommended by other ladies from my clinic and half the price. But still a seriously weird day all round.
I'll sleep well tonight

@Brightertimesahead glad you found it and sorry you arrived to my mini meltdown!

@HJen22 @Coops0406 @Ems123456789 and @AliceAbsolum @SamTTC

Thank you all for your kind words- My OH does the injections as I couldn't do the myself I can't watch as he prepares them or I cry before it's even time to do them.
I got used to the 1 a night just about, but 2 is proving too much, although todays are done with a lot less tears and less feeling sorry for myself, so hoping tomorrows better.
Day 5 of stims done, another 2 Tomorrow then a scan Monday.

@Ems123456789 hope everything went well today :) I'm feeling better today aside from a raging hormone headache- those I can deal with though.

@AliceAbsolum sounds like you have had a very emotional day today. I literally dread the injections all day, I also pass out every time I have bloods and they find it difficult to get blood- my OH likes to joke about me being a high maintenance patient.

Good news about your lining :) hope you manage to relax before Wednesday.

@HJen22 that's great that you have joined the gym and booked some nights away, it's good to have something to look forward too.
Love the plant idea, do you mind me asking what the book is?

@AliceAbsolum what a wild experience! It sounds kind of exciting as well though. It's good that you (probably) only have to go two more times, considering how much of an ordeal it is. I've never been to Cyprus so I had no idea the border was that difficult to cross. Well, what a story you will have to tell :)

@Ems123456789 how did it go??

@Coops0406 is it an ERA you are doing, or a different kind of test cycle? How frustrating about the lining but as you say, it's great that they can work out how to get your levels right before an actual transfer!

I got my results back from my bacterial swabs and the result was "no abnormal pathogens," which I guess means it's all good? I honestly am not sure what exactly the GP checked (I've read Atopobium vaginae and Gardnerella vaginalis are the ones specifically linked to fertility), but I also have no idea how these tests actually work.
But I'm glad I had the tests done regardless as it's pretty much all I can do at this stage. Does anyone else feel helpless about all the issues that COULD be preventing implantation, but that we haven't been tested for? I can drive myself crazy worrying about whether the lack of endometrial scratching or an autoimmune panel or ERA or AHA or baby aspirin etc etc etc is what is actually hindering me from becoming pregnant, and I am at the mercy of the doctors in terms of finding out if any/all of those things could help.

I'm trying to tamper down what is essentially just me being frustrated with a situation I can't control, at least until I've been through all my FETs for this round. But I just don't like having this idle time and not somehow using it productively 🧐

@PMAmostofthetime it's so daunting I really do understand the worry, and a fear of needles must be so much harder. I was worried about the fact we were doing them and not a Dr or nurse! Well done for getting through the two today, have faith in yourself and you can, and will, do this x

Of course, it's called "How to cope with IVF" by Silvia Dunn. My sister bought me it. I also read the IVF guide which was from both a guy and girls perspective and really good.

We bought a camellia called "Dr King" which should flower some pretty red flowers if we manage not to kill it haha xx

Thanks for the warm welcome all. It’s really quite incredible to find a group of strangers all in each other’s corner over this very difficult part of all our lives. I won’t give you chapter and verse of my back story but I’m very lucky to have my DS from my second FET from my second fresh cycle . We have been trying for our second with the remaining 8 embryos since he was 9 months and needlesss to say I’ve have 8 miscarriages in varying forms. We did a final fresh cycle this January in an attempt to find a chromosome normal embryo with PGT- A testing. Unbelievably we did ( I’m 41) and I’m waiting to transfer that with this current medicated FET. I got covid last week however and although now testing negative seem to have also got a stomach bug. All far from ideal. Especially for our last attempt where the stakes seem so high and the pressure is intense. I’m sure you can all relate. I’ll reply individually in my next message as still feeling ropey but didn’t want to ignore the lovely welcome from you all - thank you x

@SamTTC Sounds like you are doing everything and hopefully that will reduce your anxiety and help with implantation. How many transfers have you had?
The whole thing feels like we are constantly waiting doesn't it, I get your frustration.

@HJen22 the plant sounds lovely, thank you for the book names, I think I'll order those. Always makes me feel better when I'm reading about things and well some of the things that come up when I google are just scary.

@Brightertimesahead hoping this next cycle works for you so pleased to hear your cycle went so well. Lovely news about your DS.

@SamTTC well done on the swabs! I must admit my knowledge of all the different immune tests etc is limited but I hope the doctors are taking you through each test they can to rule things out.

@Brightertimesahead I am sorry to hear about all your losses, you are a true warrior and I’m pleased to hear you found that embryo. Keeping everything crossed for you.

@PMAmostofthetime to be scared of needles too must be so tough, you are doing amazingly! Give yourself a good pat on the back for doing it everyday. I am okay with needles but still used to give myself some chocolate every night after injections as a treat.

I had my fresh transfer yesterday, a good embryo and I’m 34 so at my clinic Apparently the stats for my age are 46% success rate from transfer to successful live birth. So I’ve basically a 1/2 chance. I can test on the 28th, if negative, test again on 31st (though have told family it will be another 2 weeks as want to give myself some space.) nurse was clear to not test early which I won’t. Now to keep myself very occupied - first time I’ve got this far in a round. Any tips for the wait would be welcome.

Oh wow @Brightertimesahead what an ordeal. You have put your body through so much and it seems absurdly unfair that out of so many embryos, none of them have yet resulted in a baby. Surely they must have done testing as to why the miscarriages keep happening? It is wonderful about the new normal embryo and they say that once you have that, the age you are at transfer doesn’t matter, so hopefully your clinic is doing everything possible to support you.
That does sound unfortunate about covid. When would your transfer be? Are you planning to delay in case you are not feeling well at the time?

@Ems123456789 ohh congratulations on being officially PUPO! I am also 34 :) I wish I had tips for the TWW, I’ve spent all of mine mindlessly googling pregnancy symptoms (and the answer is the same every time - this could be a sign or it could not be. And yet I keep googling!). If you want to take your mind off it maybe pick up a simple hobby (I taught myself punch needle last time), and otherwise I recommend watching YouTube videos of other people going through TWW hahah. Also make the most of this gorgeous weather and go for some good long walks!

@Ems123456789 congratulations on your transfer. Those are really positive stats your clinic have given you ( even with a chromsomally normal embryo at my age they say there is still only a 20% chance). I will keep everything crossed for you. Have you tried the Mindful IVF app. Lovely sounding Irish man who talks you through each day of the 2ww with meditations that are only about 10mins long but I found them helpful so maybe you would too.

@SamTTC - yes I had a hysteroscopy, karyotyping and a full thrombophilia screen for the miscarriages but everything cam back normal apart from testing positive for the MTHFR gene which the doctors are not convinced causes miscarriages however they put you on very low dose blood thinner and up your Folic Acid intake. My suspicion is that if I had money, time and the mental energy - we’d probably unearth immune issues but at this late stage the whole process of going down that route felt too overwhelming as time isn’t so much on our side anymore. I have a son and a husband to look after ( he has cancer but it’s under control atm) and steroid treatment side effects made me worry that the other stuff would get too hard. So I’m blindly praying that the doctors are right and the miscarriages are just down to chromosome error and bad luck ( they don’t support immune testing ) of course my mind is loaded with ‘what if’s?’ etc !

@AliceAbsolum that’s some amazing endurance you’ve had to go through by the sounds of your story. I’m so glad you’ve managed to get back to your embryos - wishing you full on baby power ( yes - that’s a thing haha) for the duration of your time there and after x

@PMAmostofthetime how are the headaches? I’m so sorry to hear about your needle fear. I think your amazing for doing this. Well done x

Hi Ladies, I hope you don’t mind if I join in?
I’ve been reading your posts for a while now and it really helped me to realise I’m not alone in my struggle. The ones awaiting their EC and transfers soon - I’m wishing you the very best of luck! And the ones that unfortunately didn’t succeed this time - i’m keeping my fingers crossed for you next time! although it’s hard now, you’re all true fighters and I’m sure your time will come and you’ll all hold babies in your arms xx

A little bit about me - I’m 29 and have been ttc for 3yrs. At the end of December my nhs funding for two rounds was finally approved and here I am today - my EC was on Friday with a possible fresh transfer on Monday. I’m not sure why the clinic wants to do 3day transfer instead of 5day, but I guess they have their reasons. I’m hopeful but also quite down at the same time (cried so many times over the last 3 years and had my positivity crashed every time I had a negative test .. for the last three years I’ve never seen a bfp and so find it hard to believe it will happen now, though I know I should be more positive about it all).
Sorry for venting and have a lovely Sunday all! x