FET and mental health

[Voulezvous2727]

Hello. I'm a week away from my second FET (first one failed) and whilst I know fertility treatment is hard, especially emotionally, I'm finding the transfer process in particular is bringing up awful childhood memories. I think combined with the medication, it's leaving me in a place, mentally and emotionally, that I'm finding really difficult to deal with. Before my first transfer in September, I couldn't sleep or eat and I was like a zombie. I spoke to my Doctor about how I was feeling anxious etc and she has been really kind and has suggested Temazepam for this transfer. I didn't want to take it last time as I didn't want to feel out of control and not be able to ask for it to stop and I'm still worried about taking it but have agreed to wait until the day to decide.

I've tried to get in touch with the counsellor the clinic recommend but I haven't heard back, I've tried to get some therapy through health insurance but it'll take a while to be able to start it and I've been on an NHS waiting list for therapy for 3 years. I'm just not sure where to turn. I'm not sure it's really a fertility issue. It's taken me by surprise how it's made me feel and I'm worried it's going to impact on the transfer as I've convinced myself that the first one failed because of it.

I just wondered if anything similar has happened to anyone else or if anyone has any ideas on what I can do?

Gosh @Voulezvous2727 I'm sorry this sounds really tough. I don't think it will have a quick fix. I think considering the transfer is imminent deciding on the day if you need the medication is a good idea.

In the long term I think counselling is the best option, which it sounds like you know already. Is there any way to speed up the process of getting the counselling set up though the healthcare insurance? I was able to set this up pretty quickly, although there was a 1 month waiting list for the psychologist I wanted to see.

Everyone is stressed during IVF so do not worry about it having an impact on outcomes. Don't let yourself go down that negative thought spiral.

In the shorter term, there might be options for other anti-anxiety medications if you aren't keen on how Temazepam made you feel. I had 10mg diazepam for my transfer - I think if I were to have another I'd ask for a lower dose, because it did feel very sedating, but even 2mg or 5mg might be enough to help you feel better? You could maybe ask her if there is a less sedating one you could try.